Thursday, April 18, 2024

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Soundtrack to WrestleMania 24

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Welcome to Soundtrack here at Diva Dirt, a hopefully regular feature where we offer you the soundtrack to the big Diva matches of the moment. We’re just five days away from WrestleMania 24 when Beth Phoenix and Melina will team up against Ashley and Maria… so without further ado, allow us to introduce you to our soundtrack to BunnyMania.

  1. Ring the Alarm – Beyonce
    Getting everyone in the fighting spirit is Beyonce’s “Ring the Alarm”, taken from her 2006 album “B’Day.” This song serves as a prelude, riling up the tag teams for the match ahead, with feisty lyrics like: “Ring the alarm / I been through this too long…”
  2. Brave – Jennifer Lopez
    There’s no running away from the Women’s Champion and a former Women’s Champion, once that bell rings, Maria and Ashley. They need to toughen up and Jennifer Lopez’s song is just perfect: “It’s time to feel brave / Say I’m not afraid…”
  3. Unappreciated – Cherish
    The title says it all. Expressing the sentiments of Beth Phoenix and Melina, is Cherish’s “Unappreciated.” As the current Women’s Champion and a former Women’s Champion, Beth and Melina are underappreciated by WWE Creative sticking them in this insta-car-crash.
  4. Superstar – Lupe Fiasco
    “If you are what you say you are / A superstar / Then have no fear / The camera’s here…” goes the chorus of Lupe Fiasco’s hit single. Appealing to Ashley and Maria in particular, who have posed for Playboy for the opportunity to get on the WrestleMania card. You want fame, you got it!
  5. You Know I’m No Good – Amy Winehouse
    As Ashley tags in, we hear the distinct vocals of Amy Winehouse singing, “You know I’m no good…”, describing perfectly Ashley’s in-ring offering to this match.
  6. Stupid Girls
    As we approach half way point, it’s time for the action to pick up to the musical stylings of Pink’s “Stupid Girls.” All about the bimbo-culture that has overtaken today’s media and society such as Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan, the same can apply here, can it not?
  7. Bad Girl – Danity Kane
    As Melina’s vicious streak unloads on Maria and Ashley, the lyrics of Danity Kane’s “Bad Girl” fit her to a tee. “When the red light comes on I transform…” sing Diddy’s proteges. Featuring the legendary Missy Elliot, she raps: “They call me a jezebel / Cause I freaks / I does it well / Got extensions in my hair / Bad girls is y’all up in here…”
  8. Nasty Girl – Destiny’s Child
    Fashion commentary of the soundtrack comes from Destiny’s Child, as we foreshadow more hoochie wear from Ashley. # Nasty put some clothes / I told ya / Don’t walk out your your house without some clothes on…”
  9. Mile In These Shoes – Jennifer Lopez
    Some inspiration for team Beth and Melina comes in the form of “Mile In These Shoes” by Jennifer Lopez. Telling the world that their opponents couldn’t walk a mile in their shoes: # Even if they tried / They still can’t walk a mile in these shoes / They couldn’t even lace ’em up right / Honey, these pumps are too big to fill / Ten million men can’t walk a mile in these shoes # Exerting their talent and wrestling prowess over their opponents and the unexperienced lumberjacks surrounding the ring.
  10. Breakin’ Dishes – Rihanna
    As the match comes to it’s closing moments, Beth and Melina are taking no prisoners: # I’m breakin’ dishes up in here all night / Uh-huh / I ain’t gon’ stop until I see police lights #
  11. Bite the Dust – Pussycat Dolls
    As the match comes to an end, it’s time for the heels to put these Playboy posers to rest! # Bite the dust / Anything you can do / I can do better than you…” scream the lyrics of Pussycat Dolls’ feistier singles.
  12. Resentment – Beyonce
    As the match comes to an end, another Beyonce track, “Resentment” articulates the feelings of Beth and Melina as they win a hard fought *cough* battle against the Playboy posers. Well, in our version of the story anyway! The Divas feel resentment for having to compete in this utter trainwreck (we can foresee the future), when they should be in a competetive Women’s Championship match.
  13. Sorry, Blame It On Me – Akon
    Rounding out the soundtrack is Akon’s apology song, giving us that “morning after the night before” feeling. Ashley and Maria (Ashley, moreso) apologise for what was described overnight by critics from Dave Scherer to Dave Meltzer as a complete and utter mess that should never be spoken of again, never to be acknowledged ever again – in fact, it should even be edited out of the WrestleMania 24 DVD.

That concludes our soundtrack, but what do you think? Those are the songs I know of anyway, do you have more suggestions? Let us know!

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