Tuesday, September 28, 2021

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Impact Write-Up (February 27th, 2014): Tag Team Bedlam

Hey Guys! Chris here, back with another edition of the Impact Write-Up! We’re still on the ongoing, never-ending tour of England, this week in London! We do have a fresh match-up with a brand new Knockout making her in-ring debut on Impact, so let’s get to it!

Knockouts tag team action is featured this week as Alpha Female teams up with Lei’D Tapa (with Gail Kim and Chris Sabin) taking on the on again, off again team of Velvet Sky and Madison Rayne!

I’m guessing it’s okay to one again refer to them as “The Beautiful People” since they are simultaneously shaking their rumps doing the entrance. This started out pretty decently with Madison looking really strong while taking it to both Tapa and Alpha. You can really tell how hard she has been working since her return. I thought it kind of started to fall apart towards the end with four competitors, two on the outside, and a limited amount of time. Velvet Sky seemed more worried about going after Chris Sabin then either of her opponents and personally that confused me a little bit. Also, with this being Alpha’s debut match I would have liked to see her a little bit more in the ring.

And then… the finish happened…. Sabin was distracting the referee, which allowed Gail to interfere and Tapa to pin the champion… Okay, fair enough. But in the words of any great Ronco infomercial ” But wait, there’s more!” This ENRAGES Velvet Sky to the point that she goes into VELVET RAGE! She attacks her ex-boyfriend, pounding on him in the corner like a wild Parana on the hunt! She is then put into the Full Nelson by Alpha Female and then for the save… ODB!

I’m not sure why exactly she was there, but it’s Impact so it’s okay, right? This whole segment happened so fast that it honestly made my head spin. It was insanely difficult for me to keep up with not only WHAT was happening, but more importantly WHY it was happening. As I’m watching this segment so many questions are running through my mind. For example: Why is Velvet so upset with Sabin if she wanted to dump him in the first place? When are we going finally see Lei’D Tapa split away from Gail Kim? Why did ODB go after Alpha Female? Where the ever living hell is Brooke? What time does the replay of ArRIVAL air? TNA has a PPV next weekend, they still have PPVs?

Don’t get me wrong, I like all the women involved in this match but with this kind of booking it’s hard for me to figure out what exactly the hell is going on.

Finally, We have a in-ring segment between Christy Hemme and Sam Shaw aka the Dexter of TNA. There’s not much to note here besides Sam’s usual creepiness, a slap from Hemme, and Hemme apparently now providing the vocals to Shaw’s theme song despite the fact that she finds him creepy… Awkkkkkkkward…. Anyways, It’s always nice to see Hemme involved in a angle. I was always a fan of hers and it depresses me to this day that she was never Knockouts Champion. Plus, who could forget her iconic three week feud with Cookie in 2010?

That’s it for the Impact Write-Up this week, I now need a Advil after watching this. Until next week, choo choo darlins’.

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