Thursday, March 28, 2024

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Introducing “Hit or Miss?”: August 30th – September 6th

Introducing yet another new feature to Diva Dirt – Hit or Miss?! We’ll be examining the week’s news bits and deeming them hits or misses. These won’t be storyline-based – we won’t be judging by a character’s progression. Instead, we’ll be looking at the real-life drama. For instance, did a Diva develop some backstage heat? That’s a miss. What about a Knockout match receiving the highest ratings of the show? That’s a hit. I’ll rate each story by stars (out of 5) – more stars for a hit, less for a miss. Got it? Let’s dive in..

Story #1: Candice makes like Superman and “Returns”.
Candice Michelle made her long-awated return to the ring on this past Monday’s RAW, getting the win for her team and getting one-up on Beth Phoenix. However, her in-ring performance was highly debated amongst fans. The ending was even edited to cut out multiple botches. So, was it sloppy work or simply a case of ring rust?
Rating:
Hit or Miss?: 2 stars makes it a MISS. Yes, she was returning after a year away. Yes, she has every excuse to be a little rusty. However, if you saw the unedited footage, you can tell that it was pretty damn sloppy, and there’s no excuse for that kind of work. We can debate the reason for this until the cows come home, but the bottom line was that she wasn’t ready to wrestle on live TV. The WWE should have given her more time to wrestle at house shows to work off the ring rust. Is that her fault? No, but one would think she’d have prepared herself better for her big return. I’m just hoping she’ll put on a much better performance this coming Monday – after all, this one will be live, and that means no editing!

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Story #2: Maria gets all cam-whore for the Fan Nation.
Maria added a few photos to her WWE Fan Nation profile, and the results were nothing more than a few vain pictures that harkens to a 13-year-old girl’s MySpace page. We got the “digitized” photo, the black-and-white hoodie photos, the trout pout, and the “flatttering angle” photos. All in all, it shows that even a WWE Diva has too much time on her hands every now and then. (See the original post.)
Rating:
Hit or Miss?: 1/2 a star makes it a MISS. Really, all this shows is that either Maria has the mentality of your everyday camera whore (meaning they take a billion photos of themselves, not meaning they’re stripping or anything) or she had a serious lapse in judgment. Honestly, looking sexy in photos you obviously took of yourself is best left in high school. Maria, clearly, is long graduated – but is she really? I’m just glad to see that her famous trout-pout is her own move, not the photo director’s. Now I can aim my hate solely on her for unleashing such a horrid facial expression onto WWE.com and beyond.

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Story #3: Kelly & Beth get digital.
Beth Phoenix & Kelly Kelly were recently confirmed for the roster of the upcoming SmackDown vs. Raw 2009 video game, with photos of both video game newcomers popping up on the web. (Click here for more info.)
Rating:
Hit or Miss?: 3 & a 1/2 stars makes it a HIT. Video games aren’t the cure for cancer, but it’s pretty cool to see some new Divas being added to the yearly game. Their likenesses seem pretty spot-on, and WWE fans should have fun playing as both girls. Usually the Diva presence is pretty limited in video games, but hopefully this year’s installment will change that.

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Story #4: Cherry not “thin enough” to be a Diva?
Not too long ago, Cherry was released by the WWE. Up until now, we’ve been in the dark on why this happened. According to reports, her firing had a lot to do with her lack of a “Diva-friendly” image:

Regarding the recent release of Cherry (real name Kara Drew), 33, she was said to not be a favorite among key people in World Wrestling Entertainment as some of them believed she wasn’t thin enough to be WWE Diva. She originally got in due to her partnership with Deuce & Domino as the act was well-received by the creative team when they were in Ohio Valley Wrestling. Additionally, most of the women in the WWE are either in the company for bikini speads, or in some cases, because they can wrestle well, and she didn’t fit either category particularly well. It’s also interesting to note that Cherry handled most of the business with the office for both Deuce & Domino.

Rating:
Hit or Miss?: 0 stars makes it a MISS. I can’t even express how angry it makes me to think that the WWE is still so hung up on having a certain “image” for their Divas. Cherry was by NO means fat, but I suppose she wasn’t pin thin enough to wrestle in a bikini top, so the WWE couldn’t have any of that. Fuck them. I’ll say it again – FUCK. THEM. I actually thought Cherry could help reshape the Diva image, but so much for that.

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Story #5: Mickie is confronted with her porn past.
Mickie James did the media rounds promoting her cameo on USA Network’s Psych and while on the InsideSTL radio show, the hosts did something she clearly wasn’t expecting – questioning her about certain photos they came across on Google. The photos (from multiple photoshoots) feature Mickie in some pretty raunchy poses. Clearly, Mickie was hoping that people had forgotten about them, as she didn’t have much of a response outside of some stuttering and saying something about people coming from different backgrounds. Obviously, she was caught off guard, and before she could even confirm that she took those photos, the interview was cut short. (See the original post.)
Rating:
Hit or Miss?: 1 & 1/2 stars makes it a MISS. She doesn’t owe anybody anything, but she could have AT LEAST said “Yes, I did that.” In the media, silence is as good as guilt, and looking guilty does her no good. Making excuses does her no good. Those photos are pretty foul, and if she wants to move on from them (which she obviously does), she needs to admit to them. With the massive percentage of children populating today’s WWE audience, it’s highly possible that one of them could come across those photos simply by Googling Mickie’s name (which is what the radio hosts did). As a popular babyface, she has a bit of a responsibility to act as a role model. Ignoring the photos won’t make them go away and wipe it from our memories. If she owns up to them and prefers to keep it in her past, all is well. But to be fair, she was bombarded with the question. However, if I were her, I’d be more than aware that those photos are out there and be prepared (even paranoid) in case someone would bring it up.

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Story #6: Divas invade your television sets.
This week, Trish Stratus‘s new travel series debuted on Candian TV, Mickie James made a cameo on USA Network’s Psych, and Stacy Keibler‘s new miniseries Samurai Girl debuted on ABC Family.
Rating:
Hit or Miss?: 4 stars makes it a HIT. Regardless of the success of any of the shows, it’s nice to see Divas venturing from their usual territory. Stacy’s trying to mount a Hollywood career, while Trish is going on a more humble venture with her Canada-only show. Mickie only made a cameo, but that show is pretty popular, and who knows where that may lead for her? It’s wouldn’t be the first time any WWE Superstar or Diva has been bitten by the acting bug, but for the WWE’s sake I hope Mickie sticks around for a long while. Anywho, here’s hoping for some post-WWE success for all!

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So, what’d you think? Did you think a hit was a miss or vice-versa! Let us know!

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