Wednesday, August 4, 2021

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Raw Redux (September 9th, 2013): ‘Total Divas’ Turn the Tables

Okay! So with Night of Champions right around the corner, we were treated to a Divas’ tag team match, as well as Summer Rae and Fandango trolling The Miz, and Queen Stephanie McMahon being, well a Queen. I hate saying it, but I love this McMahon-Helmsley stuff. It’s almost, kind of good cop and bad cop between Stephanie and Triple H, but not really. Stephanie is like being a master manipulator, but playing the sympathy card. Triple H, on the other hand, is being the douchey butt in this situation. Words are failing in trying to describe it, but you guys have read my stuff long enough now to be able to speak my language!

First of all, HOW DARE THEY!!!! I just can not even with The Shield at this moment in time. My poor precious bb Christian… ugh God. I thought had I retired the sexy nurse’s costume for awhile, but of course not. It’s Christian and he seems to get battered and injured in the blink of an eye. Le sigh. The McMahons are so gross. I truly felt Edge’s anguish in this segment. My little heart broke in a thousand pieces. I sort of want to volunteer myself to put Stephanie in her place…

Sort of. She scares me.

Queen Stephanie also appeared on our television later on in the night. Poor Goldust, who was fighting so valiantly to try and save his little brother’s job, ultimately failed in his quest to get the job done against the evil bastard (can I even write that in this…) that is Randy Orton.

Wow, Stephanie. Could you twist the knife any slower? Why not just go ahead and euthanize poor Goldust while you’re at it. Not only did she Stephanie reiterate the fact that Goldust failed, she let him know just how disappointed the entire world was with him. Talk about kicking someone while they’re down. Harsh.

But that’s why we love Stephanie McMahon, isn’t it?

Summer Rae and Fandango get a lot of love from us as well. A well respected writer from another site by the name of Dave Stephens called Fandango ‘… the world’s greatest troll’ and that is legitimately the best description I’ve ever heard when it comes to the flamboyant ballroom dancer. This week the sparkling duo decided to disrupt The Miz’s match with Money in the Bank briefcase holder, Damien Sandow.

I love them so much! Summer slayed like always and there’s nothing more I can really say. I do find it sad that Rosa was kind of dropped from The Miz’s side because I do think a little mini-feud for Summer would have been nice, but maybe something more will come of it. With the WWE you never really know, so all Rosa fans can do is just sit there with their fingers crossed!

Finally, we come to our Total Divas (Brie and Nikki Bella, Natalya, Cameron, Naomi, Eva Marie, and JoJo) and their adversaries (Aksana, Layla, and Alicia Fox), and the six-woman tag team match. Our feisty champion, AJ Lee, was at ringside to do commentary for this match.

Aksana and Naomi kick things off with Naomi clearly getting the better of Aksana. Naomi ends up taking a sick fall off the top rope thanks to Aksana, and I actually had to cringe during that. The tag is eventually made to Layla, and they continue to work over Naomi. Like any good tag team match, Naomi gets the hot tag to Natalya while Alicia comes in for her team. Nattie dominates and tries for the win, but Aksana breaks it up by splashing her own partner. Nattie rids the ring of Aksana and gets Alicia into the sharpshooter. She taps immediately and the team of Nattie, Naomi, and Brie win the match.

While all of that was going on, AJ was going off on Jerry Lawler on commentary. She threw a lot of shade at him, to which he fired back that was too ugly for him. The commentary was just awful, and so distracting to the match which in all actuality wasn’t half bad. It’s just a shame that AJ and Lawler took away from what was going on in the ring. I don’t like Divas on commentary anyway because the announcers usually come off as so rude to them. But AJ, to her credit, just sat there and fired shots back, and talked over JBL and Michael Cole as well.

At the end, AJ stood up and held up her title as the Total Divas taunted her. Sunday is going to be amazing with this four Diva match. We haven’t really had something like this in awhile and I, for one, am looking forward to this match a lot. I have no idea who’s going to win, but I can say I don’t think Naomi is going to walk about the title. Other than that, I could honestly see Nattie or Brie winning, or AJ retaining to prolonge this feud.

Night of Champions and the mid-season finale/reunion of Total Divas leaves us for a packed Sunday night! I can’t wait and we still have SmackDown! Who knows what else we might get to see before Sunday?! I won’t be here for SmackDown but you guys will definitely be seeing me Sunday, so until then… Khaleesi out!

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