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Raw Redux (December 14th, 2009) – What’s Wrong With This Picture?

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Last night’s Raw, in all its bloated 3 hour glory, was the annual Slammy Awards edition. Among the awards to be handed out were Diva of the Year, which was to be voted on by the fans at WWE.com. As we waited on pins and needles (not) to find out who won the award, we pondered whether the award would be given to support a storyline via rigging by the WWE or a popularity contest held by the voting public. As is turns out, it was neither, and I’ll explain my theory as we come to it.

We start our Divas action (not counting the Divas presenting awards throughout the night) with a Jerry Springer-esque evening gown tag team match. The babyfaces–Mickie James, Melina, Brie & Nikki Bella, Kelly Kelly, Gail Kim, and Maria are taking on the heels–Michelle McCool, Layla, Maryse, Beth Phoenix, Natalya, Alicia Fox, and Rosa Mendes. Most look out of place and trashy in their gowns, and I would critique them (I’ll save that for this week’s Style Jury), but I’m much more distracted by the fact that they’re WRESTLING IN EVENING GOWNS. Well, this’ll be one mesmerizing clusterfuck:


Skip to 2:52

They start with a line-up face-off, trading verbal barbs before heading off their their respective corners. Mickie and Rosa start off the match, Rosa takign advantage and tossing Mickie around, pounding her head on the mat. They trade slaps, and Rosa tosses Mickie into the corner. Mickie blocks her attack, locking her head with her legs and hitting a hurricanrana. She then pulls her to her feet, hitting her Mickie-T to get the pin an the win for her team.

I have to say, this is one of the few moments where I’m glad that a Diva match was cut short. I’m glad that no more than two Divas had to humiliate themselves by wrestling in their dresses. Mickie and Rosa did as awkwardly as I expected, but hey, someone had to take the bullet. Now that the match is over, it’s time for the Diva of the Year Slammy to be awarded. The girls line up in anticipation as MVP and Goldust present the award.

Our winner is announced as, drumroll please…. Maria??? MVP’s reaction right before he reads her name says it all, and Maria looks as shocked as the rest of us as she goes up to accept her award, saying a typical acceptance speech before being interrupted by Batista in a douche costume, doing a Kanye West impression that’s not only awful but over 3 months old. If the joke were a carton of milk, it would have expired into a living organism at this point and, ironically, would be more worthy of a Diva of the Year award than Maria. Maria plays Taylor Swift as she left the stage and allowed Dave to be “escorted” off by security.

But as we watch the wild pink-polo-wearing douchebag be captured in his natural habitat, we’re left to ponder the reasoning behind this decision to crown Maria as Diva of the Year. Was is it truly a popularity contest, and she was just the most popular Diva among the fans? Or was it rigged for storyline purposes? As I said earlier, I believe it was neither, because I have a theory. Yes, Maria is popular, and I do not doubt that fans flocked to vote for her in the poll, but I don’t believe her star power amongst the casual fans is that much stronger than, say, a Mickie James or a Kelly Kelly.

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Diva Dirt Style Jury: Week of December 7th, 2009

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ddstylejury

Welcome to the Diva Dirt Style Jury! No more are the separate ‘Best’ and ‘Worst’ lists, instead we have come up with a scientific approach *cough* to compiling our weekly fashion column. The Diva Dirt team will weigh in on the different looks from the week gone by & mark each look with a score out of ten. The look with the highest average score will be our best look and the look with the lowest average score will be the worst look. Click each photo to see the look in full size.

Let the proverbial runway show begin!

JILLIAN
Erin: Jillian’s ring outfits are usually pretty dull, but this one is a bit interesting with that color and pattern. It’s still not much, though. 6/10
Melanie: I actually really like this. It’s cute without being boring as with her past outfits. 6/10
Steven: I like the color on her, but would love to see her do something more with her wardrobe. The black pants/colored top combo is getting kinda old. 6/10

KELLY KELLY
Erin: Too “Flashdance” for my taste. I don’t know.. The naked shoulder just looks a little try-hard. It’s not awful, though. 6/10
Melanie: Don’t like it. The top just isn’t flattering on her and I’d prefer pants. 3/10
Steven: Like we said on the Post-Raw Show, Kelly’s outfit this week was… strange. Looks like she grabbed the nearest black bedsheet and fashioned it into an outfit. 4/10

Read on for more of this week’s outfits and to see who’s been branded our winner and loser.

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Raw Redux (December 7th, 2009) РA (Relative) Sm̦rg̴sbord of Divas

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With Maryse two weeks into her return, fans have been less than impressed with her all-around performance. Her return was more head-scratching than anything else and her match last week didn’t show her in-ring skills as much as a more refined affinity to sneak out a win. Will she continue on that path this week, or will we see a more ring-focused Maryse?

We start our night seeing that Kelly Kelly has been handed the duty of announcing the night’s first Divas match. I’m not all the surprised that they saddled Kelly with this random job, since the WWE has a tendency to stick Divas in announcing positions when they don’t know what else to do with them. We’ll see if this becomes a regular thing or was just a plot device to bring in Melina post-match.

The match in question is Gail Kim vs. Maryse. I’m psyched to see Gail get some one-on-one action, as she’s usually stuck in tag team matches (aside from the odd Superstars match). Let’s see if she can pull some good things out what’s so far been a lackluster return angle for Maryse:

The match starts off with a requisite show of arrogance by Maryse–she actually shoves Gail by the head twice. Gail seems to keep her annoyance in check until she spears Maryse to the mat, pounding on her until she’s shoved off. Maryse darts to safety at the other side of the ring, but Gail keeps on her, tossing her by the hair and whipping her into the ropes. Maryse hangs on to the ropes, but Gail drags her back to the middle of the ring by a leg, making Maryse hop along. Gail tosses Maryse’s leg aside, spinning her, and then slamming her down with a hard clothesline.

Maryse crawls to the corner, and once she’s to her feet, Gail charges at her, slipping out of the ring and back in under the ropes, out-smarting Maryse and rolling her up into a pin attempt. Maryse kicks out at two and wanders to the next corner, only to be sandwiched into it by a flying Gail. Maryse drops to her butt, and Gail proceeds to drive her knee into her neck, using her standing leverage to apply the pressure. Gail eventually backs off and Maryse gets to her feet, simply slapping Gail in the face in rebuttal.

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Diva Dirt Style Jury: Week of November 23rd, 2009

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ddstylejury

Welcome to the Diva Dirt Style Jury! No more are the separate ‘Best’ and ‘Worst’ lists, instead we have come up with a scientific approach *cough* to compiling our weekly fashion column. The Diva Dirt team will weigh in on the different looks from the week gone by & mark each look with a score out of ten. The look with the highest average score will be our best look and the look with the lowest average score will be the worst look. Click each photo to see the look in full size.

Let the proverbial runway show begin!

BETH PHOENIX
Erin: The phoenix on the tights kind of looks like a slapped-on decal. The whole thing is rather dull–I really prefer Beth’s more colorful outfits. 5/10
Melanie: I’m not a huge fan of her brightly coloured Glamasuits [the red, blue and green ones] but I much prefer them to this. They have more spark and personality. 4/10
Steven: Nice to see The Glamazon getting back to some normal ring gear. Those shiny numbers were kicking my ass. Nothing different from the norm here, but Beth looks great nonetheless. 7/10

EVE TORRES
Erin: The silver and black aren’t anything special, but I still like the shorts Eve wrestles in. Maybe if there were more color in it, it’d look more interesting. 6/10
Melanie: I really dislike Eve’s ring gear; the shorts could be cute but the tops are just awful. 5/10
Steven: Same gear, different color. This silver one is a tad bland though. I definitely prefer her other metallic corsets over this one. 6/10

Read on for more of this week’s outfits and to see who’s been branded our winner and loser.

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Unwrapped: Divas Thanksgiving Photoshoot

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In celebration of Thanksgiving, this edition of Unwrapped will feature the Divas’ Thanksgiving-themed photoshoot, in which each dress in their best (or most stereotypical) Native American costumes. (Click here to see the full photoshoot.)

We’ll give you the chance to give your own grade to each photoshoot, “branding” each like so: Sweet means it’s great, Bland means it’s on the fence, and Sour means it’s just awful. Now, let’s unwrap this eye candy:

Alicia Fox
Grade: Bland. The color and fit of the dress make it look more like a potato sack than a dress. The matching blue trim and headband are cute, though, and the red feather absolutely pops. But still, for someone we’ve dubbed “Alicia Fierce”, she could have cooked up a far more fierce costume than this!
[poll id=”450″]

Beth Phoenix
Grade: Sweet. I love that Beth went pretty bare-bones and wore (what looks like) a deer skin outfit fashioned with her own two hands. I’d totally buy it if you told me Beth took down and skinned the deer herself. So sexy! ..Not the “killing animals” part, of course. You know what I mean.
[poll id=”451″]

Read more to see the rest of the Thanksgiving looks and vote for your favorite.

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Raw Redux (November 23rd, 2009) – A Turkey of a Return

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Back in the 1920s, showbiz had a slang term for a failure or flop: they’d call it a turkey*. Fitting, given the failures we witnessed tonight on this Thanksgiving episode of Raw where a certain Diva went so far as to dress in a turkey costume for her big return. So, was it cleverly self-referential or just a bad idea? I think we know the answer to that, but just in case let’s watch the situation unfold and decide for ourselves:

Predictably, the Divas have dressed up for a “Mayflower Melee”, AKA Thanksgiving-themed 6-Diva tag match. The faces–Mickie James, Melina, and Kelly Kelly–are decked out in (*cough* super un-P.C. *cough*) Native American garb, while the heels–Michelle McCool, Layla, and Jillian–are Pilgrims. All look pretty ridiculous, even Kelly, who apparently decided to put on a tan dress and some Nikes and call it a day. But hey, at least she doesn’t look like she’s doing a Kindergarten Thanksgiving play like Michelle & co. I must say, I love how pissed they looked to be dressed in those Pilgrim costumes. At least they’re acknowledging how lame the idea is, unlike so many times in the past.

Before the match starts they are joined by the guest time keeper, the Gobbledy Gooker! …You know, the giant turkey that hatched on live television in what was known as one of the biggest “WTF” moments in WWE history? I guess since they had two Thanksgiving cliches represented, they decided to go for the trifecta. Gooker stands in the corner and awkwardly rings the bell, signaling the start of the match.

Melina and Jillian start out the match, probably praying that they can scrub off some of the bad mojo they’ve had with each other as of late. They start with a tie-up, Melina getting the upper hand by wrenching Jillian’s arm. Jillian gains control, slamming Melina to the mat. Melina reverses an irish-whip into the corner, sending Jillian into the turnbuckle and proceeding to send a shoulder into her stomach. She lays Jillian across the second ropes, prepping her a double-knee attack. Before she can do it, however, Jillian yanks her by her dress, pulling her to the mat. She tosses Melina by the hair and taunts the crowd a bit.

Jillian whips Melina into the ropes but Melina hangs on. Before she can do anything, though, Jillian meets her with an elbow to the face. She whips Melina into the turnbuckle, prepping for her handspring elbow attack. Before she can do any damage, Melina catches her with her legs, choking her and chopping her on the head. Once back on their feet Melina takes down Jillian with a (almost malfunctioned) facebuster. She goes for the pin, but Jillian kicks out.

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Survivor Series 2009 in Review: Melina Leads Team Mickie to Victory

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Last night’s Survivor Series match was billed as Team Mickie vs Team Michelle but it was Divas Champion, Melina that scored the final pinfall and took the win for her team. When originally announced, it seemed odd that the Divas Champ would be playing second fiddle to someone else as team captain, which it makes … Read more

WWE Survivor Series 2009 Predictions

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Mickie James & Michelle McCool lead their teams to war tonight at the 23rd annual Survivor Series. Women’s Champion, Michelle McCool has proven to be quite the thorn in Mickie’s side, reducing the Diva to tears in recent weeks. But when it comes to battling it out in the ring, who will have the last … Read more

Diva Dirt Style Jury: Week of November 16th, 2009

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ddstylejury

Welcome to the Diva Dirt Style Jury! No more are the separate ‘Best’ and ‘Worst’ lists, instead we have come up with a scientific approach *cough* to compiling our weekly fashion column. The Diva Dirt team will weigh in on the different looks from the week gone by & mark each look with a score out of ten. The look with the highest average score will be our best look and the look with the lowest average score will be the worst look. Click each photo to see the look in full size.

Let the proverbial runway show begin!

ALICIA FOX
Erin: I usually like it when Divas go with unique colors for their ring gear, but I just can’t like this pukey shade of green. Not to mention the outfit itself kind of looks like a weapon, what with all the pointy-ness sprouting from it. 4/10
Melanie: As I wrote somewhere, she looks like she could double as a bike light. Seriously, it’s like she stuck deflector stickers over a set of pants/bra. 3/10
Steven: I hated this gear when she only had the top, and I hate it even more now that she has the bottoms to match. I would suggest setting it on fire, but all those burning sequins could be dangerous… 2/10

BETH PHOENIX
Erin: I hate those types of tops–the tight, uncomfortable blouses that never look right on anyone. This one looks especially awkward on Beth’s build: the sleeves cut into her arms, the blouse itself is too short, and the jeans do nothing to compliment it. 4/10
Melanie: Predictable for Beth. Not an exciting look but not a bad one either. Just blah. 5/10
Steven: Go ‘head, Ms. Glamazon! Loving this look on Beth. After her ‘look-at-my-bra’ debacle, I was starting to lose faith in her. 8/10

Read on for more of this week’s outfits and to see who’s been branded our winner and loser.

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Raw Redux (November 16th, 2009) – What Championship Match?

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With just two weeks of buildup, we finally have our ~big~ Divas Championship match, pitting champion Melina against challenger Alicia Fox. Will this match live up to fans’ expectations, or will it–like its own build-up–be a mere shell of what it could be? Needless to say us Diva fans are used to disappointment, but we still hope for the best (against our better judgment). Let’s see if this match delivers:

Of course a big one-on-one Divas Title match in Madison Square Garden was too good to be true, because soon after Melina and Alicia’s entrances it is announced (by 30 Rock’s Judah Freedlander) that this will be a Lumberjill match. No, adding Lumberjills (as we’ve learned numerous times over) does not make a title match ~epic, it just sucks the attention away from who it should be on: the challenger and the champion. I understand that this is meant to build up Survivor Series, as the lumberjills are the participants in Sunday’s match, but surely there was a way to have this match and buildup the other match without needlessly combining them? I was actually looking forward to a good, long one-on-one Divas match for once and this move just neutered the match from the get-go.

Alicia starts the match by kicking Melina in the stomach and attempting to toss her out of the ring. Melina, however, gains control and tosses Alicia out to the wolves instead (Somehow I doubt throwing Melina out to the babyface side would’ve accomplished much of anything). Alicia dashes back into the ring before any of the lumberjills can touch her, taunting them when she’s safely back in the ring, and getting rolled up by Melina for her troubles. She kicks out, and attempts a clothesline that Melina matrixes away from. She continues on an offensive drive until Alicia tricks her, allowing her to fall out of the ring to the heel side. Melina takes a beating from the heels and the babyfaces come to her rescue, allowing her to be rolled back into the ring.

Alicia tosses Melina by her hair and goes for the pin (“Not very logical”, says Spock). She attempts to lock Melina into a hold, but Melina drives her into the turnbuckle. When Alicia charges after Melina, she’s met with a flapjack and a series of clotheslines. Alicia irish-whips Melina into the corner and gets two boots to the face, but is still able to counter a charge by Melina into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. She goes for the pin, but only gets a 2-count.

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Raw Redux (November 9th, 2009) – Blink and You Missed It

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Hoping to keep her momentum going following last week’s #1 contendership win, Alicia Fox takes on the woman she beat not too long ago on WWE Superstars, Kelly Kelly. Will this match shine or pale in comparison to that bout? Let us see:

Inexplicably, Gail Kim and Jillian are at ringside, supporting their Survivor Series teammates. I’ll assume that’s the reasoning for this, because there really isn’t any other. The match starts with both girls getting in the other’s face, both looking pretty sassy. Alicia wins the sassy contest, however, because she outright pie-faces Kelly. Kelly responds with a Lous Thesz press, pounding on Alicia’s head. A bit groggy, Alicia wanders over to the corner, drawing Kelly over and sending her face-first into the turnbuckle with a drop toe hold.

She continues the facial punishment by slamming Kelly’s face to the mat and attempting a pin, which Kelly kicks out of. Kelly attempts to find some salvation in the ropes but Alicia drags her to the center of the ring as Melina (or should I say one side of Melina’s face) watches on from backstage. Melina seems impressed, but also kind of like she’s plotting murder, rubbing her hands together in evil speculation.

Alicia plants a boot into Kelly’s midsection, preening for the crowd before dragging Kelly up by her hair. Kelly fights for control though, delivering a few shots to Alicia’s stomach. Alicia puts an end to this offense, sending her to the mat with a clothesline. She again grabs Kelly by her Barbie doll locks (careful, you might pull out a few), pancaking her face to the mat. She locks Kelly into a sleeper, and Kelly fights for freedom as the crowd slowly gets behind her. She gets to her feet and drops to her backside, sending Alicia’s jaw straight onto her shoulder, breaking her free. She goes on a string of offense, ending in a Frankensteiner that she hooks into a pin for a 2-count.

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Diva Dirt Style Jury: Week of November 2nd, 2009

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ddstylejury

Welcome to the Diva Dirt Style Jury! No more are the separate ‘Best’ and ‘Worst’ lists, instead we have come up with a scientific approach *cough* to compiling our weekly fashion column. The Diva Dirt team will weigh in on the different looks from the week gone by & mark each look with a score out of ten. The look with the highest average score will be our best look and the look with the lowest average score will be the worst look. Click each photo to see the look in full size.

Let the proverbial runway show begin!

THE BELLA TWINS
Erin: I like the cut of the tops — it’s unique. But that gold color is kinda putrid, especially seeing it in two places at once. 5/10
Melanie: Enough already! Too much of the same colour, break it up please. 3/10
Steven: Sweet Lord, how many colors do these outfits come in?! Please change it up ladies. 4/10

EVE TORRES
Erin: She kind of looks like she’s wearing a bunch of those reflective safety stickers. I like that she’s going for a unique type of ring gear with the non-matching top and shorts, but it just doesn’t fit together well and makes the outfit look kinda slapdash. I like the purple, though, if that’s worth anything. 6/10
Melanie: The shimmer-y purple is off-putting to me, to be honest. I like purple but not like this. I think there’s far too much Bella-like matchy-matchy going on here too with the arm bands etc. 5/10
Steven: ame old gear, new color. I like the color though, even if it is a little bright for my taste. 6/10

Read on for more of this week’s outfits and to see who’s been branded our winner and loser.

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Report from Today’s Raw House Show in Liverpool, Diva Possibly Injured

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Diva Dirt reader, Lucy sent in the following results from tonight’s house show in Liverpool: The match was Kelly Kelly and Melina vs Jillian and Alicia Fox. Jillian and Alicia came out and Jillian sang “A Hard Day’s Night” in honour of The Beatles. She got seriously booed for that. Then Kelly came out to … Read more

Raw Redux (November 2nd, 2009) – The Fantastic Ms. Fox

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After last week’s debacle of botches and rage-inducing Hornswoggle cameos, things could only go up (I hope). Let’s take a look at how this week’s Diva action got started.

This week’s guest GMs Ozzy and Sharon Osbourne spoofed Sharon’s popular reality show “America’s Got Talent”, opening the door for any a misfit WWE toy to come out and embarrass themselves. This, of course, is right up Jillian‘s alley, so she of course showed up to croon a song for the judges, the results of which are below:

Jillian, with Chavo by her side, sang a duet of Ozzy Osbourne and Lita Ford’s “Close My Eyes Forever”. Before they could get very far the judges hit the buzzer, Ozzy saying that he was going to re-title the song “Close My Ears Forever”. Upset, Jillian told Sharon that she had always been jealous of Lita Ford. In response, Sharon told her to come to the ring (but in much more flowery a way).

As she and Chavo walked to the ring, Jillian began to sing a song by someone she deemed a “true rock icon”, belting out Britney Spears’s “Ooops, I Did it Again”. She gets in Sharon’s face, and gets a slap across the face in response. Jillian cowers in the corner as Chavo gets his due too–a chop to the head by Khali.

The segment played to Jillian’s strengths, namely making a bit of a fool of herself. But hey, no other Diva could do it quite like her, and she’s pretty funny in a shameless way. It must sting to be relegated to the goof-off spot after being in a feud for the Diva Championship just a week ago, but at least if she has to be slapped she’s getting slapped by Sharon Osbourne–it could be a helluva lot worse.

Directly following these shenanigans we have a Divas battle royal for the #1 contendership to the Divas Championship. We have Kelly Kelly, Eve Torres, the Bella Twins, Gail Kim, and Alicia Fox all in the ring. Eliminations, of course, can occur by any means, even by sliding under the bottom rope. That’s Divas battle royals for ya..

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Unwrapped: Divas “Scream Queens” Photoshoot

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We’re again bringing you a special edition of Unwrapped, where we cover multi-Diva shoots in a miniaturized version of our regular “unwrappings”, focusing on the looks and ensembles our Divas have put together. Today, as it is Halloween, our “Eye Candy” will be the kind associated with jack-o-lanterns and bags of sweets. We are looking at the 3-part “Scream Queens” photoshoot, in which the Divas show off their Halloween costumes. Click the following links to see the full photoshoots: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3.

Alicia Fox
Costume: Vampire
Creativity (on a scale of 1-10): 7. A vampire is one of the most cliche Halloween costumes, sure, but I like that she put some effort into it, wearing a cape and fangs and not being too concerned with looking sexy. Her poses are cool too, and make what could be a rather bland costume pretty exciting. Bonus points for looking a like an old school vampire, too.
Grade: Sweet. She looks cute and the extra thought put into it–not just plastic fangs and lingerie–makes it interesting.

Beth Phoenix
Costume: Nurse
Creativity (on a scale of 1-10): 1. Talk about cliche–what’s a more cheesy “sexy” costume than a nurse? Frankly, I expected better from Beth, but she seems content to pose in a skanky costume suggestively holding a stethoscope. Come on Beth, I didn’t think you were that uncreative.
Grade: Sour. This looks so strange on Beth. It’s just not “like” her, if you get my drift, and this is not an instance where that would be a good thing.

Brie & Nikki Bella
Costume: Belly dancers
Creativity (on a scale of 1-10): 4. The sexy “belly dancer” costume is pretty cliche, especially in so scantily clad a fashion. But hey, it’s kind of cool, what with all the veils and such. There’s more to it than other “sexy” costumes.
Grade: Bland. It’s not original by any means, but they certainly look cute. There’s just so much potential with twin costumes, and they sort of dropped the ball on this one.

Read on to see the rest of the Divas’ costumes and vote for your favorite.

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Trick or Treat! Going Halloween Costume Shopping: Part 3

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We’re baaack! You may remember us offering costume advice last year to Divas participating in the now-defunct Cyber Sunday Halloween costume contest. Well, we’re extending that tradition this year, extending the love to TNA’s Knockouts as well. We’ll offer costume possibilities to nearly every Diva and Knockout over 3 installments, all leading up to Halloween night. Get your popcorn ready! (Check out part 1 here, and part 2 here.)

Awesome Kong
Costume: Tinkerbell
Why?: 364 days of the year, Kong is an intimidating, destructive force that barely ever cracks a smile. For her Halloween costume, why not go in the complete opposite direction? Tinkerbell, Peter Pan’s fairy companion, is pretty much everything Kong isn’t–dainty, sparkly, girly–but she still can be pretty spiteful when crossed. I guess they’re more alike than I thought! I think it’d be hilarious to see Kong poke fun at her serious image (and we know she doesn’t take herself too seriously–just look at her Twitter page) by putting on the green dress, wings, and slippers, sprinkling pixie dust with her magic wand wherever she goes.
Get the look: Check out this website to see a variety of full Tinkerbell costumes.

Eve Torres
Costume: Sally Jupiter from “Watchmen”
Why?: Eve has a classic look about her, evidenced by some of the retro looks she sports from time to time. Considering all of that, a perfect costume for her would be that of 50’s-era Sally Jupiter–aka Silk Spectre, crime fighter from the “Watchmen” graphic novel and movie adaptation of the same name that was released earlier this year. Sally’s hot and she knows it, but that doesn’t keep her from stopping all kinds of evil-doers. She eventually gave birth to the second Silk Spectre, who eventually picks up where her mother left off, but not nearly with the same sense of style.
Get the look: Try this this costume, even though the wig’s not red. You’ll need to find your own boots and hosiery, though.

Gail Kim
Costume: Max from “Where the Wild Things Are”
Why?: In the book and movie, Max is a little boy who escapes into his imagination, voyaging to an island that inhabits large, wild creatures. With how Gail has been disappointingly treated since her return the WWE, one could suggest that a little escapism is in order for Gail. I mean, after losing to Kelly Kelly, wouldn’t you want to escape? (I’m kidding of course.. Maybe.) Gail would look adorable in Max’s wolf suit, needless to say. Of course, she would need Max’s crown too–what is a king without a crown?
Get the look: Splurge on an adult-sized costume. But at that price, you might end up wearing it year-round like Max.

Read on to see more costume suggestions.

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Raw Redux Does WWE Superstars (October 29th, 2009)

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This week on Superstars, Kelly Kelly makes her second appearance in as many weeks, taking on Alicia Fox. Will this week’s match be as entertaining as last week’s bout? Let us see:

They start with a tie-up, Alicia roughing Kelly up to gain control and wrench her arm into an arm bar. Keeping the hold locked, she slams Kelly by her hair to the mat, crouching to get the best angle on the hold. Kelly hops up, but Alicia won’t let go, wrapping it even tighter. Kelly seeks refuge in the corner, climbing the turnbuckle, hopping down butt-first onto the top rope, flipping backwards and tossing Alicia across the ring with an arm drag. Not gonna lie, that was pretty impressive..

Alicia is stunned, but manages to beat Kelly to the punch, whipping her into the opposite corner. Kelly stops herself on the turnbuckle, though, pushing herself backwards and over Alicia. She does a back tuck to keep momentum, then meeting Alicia with a dropkick when she charges towards her. Kelly goes for the pin, but is unsuccessful.

Both get to their feet at the same time, trading blows until Kelly runs the ropes, going for an attack that Alicia telegraphs, hoisting Kelly up and into a backbreaker. Alicia goes for a pin, but gets a 2-count. Not satisfied (and obviously feeling that Kelly will change her mind and stay down), she goes for another pin, but gets the same result. She circles her prey before grabbing her by the hair and planting a knee into her back, wrenching her by the neck.

With Kelly’s struggle, the move does a 180, Alicia shifting to her feet but keeping the knee firmly in place. Kelly slowly gets to her feet, but before she can counter, Alicia scoops her up. Kelly scoots over Alicia’s shoulder though, rolling her up into a pin attempt that Alicia kicks out of. Damn, the way Alicia reacted to that counter made me think it was a botch. Just good selling, though. Alicia is obviously pissed off by this, delivering a blow to Kelly’s face and taking her time, pacing the ring and taunting the crowd. This elicits a decent reaction, but I’m not sure if that’s more due to Alicia’s heel spark or Kelly’s success as a babyface.

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WWE Bragging Rights Review: SmackDown Glam Slams to Victory

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brrreview

The SmackDown team may have been led by WWE Women’s Champion, Michelle McCool but it was the newest addition to the roster that was a blue beacon of success for the brand. Decked in SmackDown colours, a royal blue Glamasuit [as we have affectionately started calling them], Beth Phoenix Glam Slammed her way to victory and had a helping hand in SmackDown taking the Bragging Rights trophy last night.

To the beginning now, let’s take a look at the match as it happened… Team SmackDown make their entrance first with the Women’s Champion debuting a new piece to her attire — a robe. Proving she can do nothing right, this one has already hit a sore spot on the interwebz with “AJ Styles rip-off” comments. Mmm… trivial. Meanwhile, Beth Phoenix is looking mighty Glamariffic in royal blue. While Team SmackDown have opted for eye-popping colours like royal blue, emerald green and hot pink, Team Raw are much more subdued in their colour choices.

We kick things off with Beth Phoenix and Gail Kim, in something of a dream match. Beth starts off with a kick to the gut followed by the Divas exchanging forearms. The crafty former Women’s Champion, Gail Kim goes for a mid-rope crossbody but is caught but the powerful Phoenix. Gail manages to flip things over into a pin attempt but Beth kicks out. The Glamazon begins woman-handling Kim before Michelle McCool blind-tags herself in. Gail manages to subdue the Champ with a lovely hurricanrana that is sold well by McCool, who then cowers into her corner allowing Natalya the tag.

Another dream match here; Nattie vs Gail. The physical third-gen Diva slams Gail to the mat. As things progress Gail hits her lovely launch through the ropes on Natalya followed by that unorthodox jumping butt bump. Kelly Kelly is then tagged in to the biggest pop so far, Kelly works well with Nattie and keeps the pace up with a twilt-a-whirl hurricanrana. Natalya then hangs Kelly on the ropes, showing her prowess. Natalya, with her brute force, drives Kelly into the corner and begins kneeing her. This all looks rather ferocious which is perhaps the biggest difference between Natalya and the Glamazon; while both share powerhouse quality — there’s nothing pretty about Nattie’s offense while Beth is a little more Diva-esque. In the corner, Kelly goes for a sunset flip but to no avail as Michelle tags in. After a short exchange, in comes Beth as Team SmackDown begin their ‘wear down’ of Kelly. Kelly makes a desperate effort to tag in Melina or Gail but the powerful Beth manages to drive her back to the Team Blue corner. Michelle is back in now and hangs in there with her team mates, throwing Kelly around like a rag doll. Beth Phoenix then blind-tags herself in much to McCool’s shock, Kelly begins fighting back with a hurricanrana into a rollup but Beth kicks out. Kelly with a jawbreaker on Beth and finally hits a tag to Melina.

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WWE Bragging Rights Predictions

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So the WWE Divas return to pay per view tonight for the second time in a month, but this time rivalries are put aside for brand pride. Melina, Kelly Kelly & Gail Kim will represent Raw as they go into battle against SmackDown’s Michelle McCool, Beth Phoenix and Natalya. Which trio of Divas will win … Read more

Unwrapped: Eye Candy for the Week Ending October 24th, 2009

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In order to consolidate our Eye Candy coverage, we’ve developed a new feature: Unwrapped! We’ll take all the new photoshoots from the week and grade (or “brand”) each based on the following criteria:

• Appearance (hair, clothes, makeup.. you get the drift)
• Poses (are they versatile or just glorified statues?)
• Uniqueness (have we seen this photoshoot a billion times before?)
Grading scale: Sweet (Great)/Bland (Iffy)/Sour (Awful)

Brie & Nikki Bella‘s Sticking to the Pattern
Appearance: Brie and Nikki are wearing matching patterned dresses; Brie is in red, Nikki in gray. I’ve got to say, it’s mile ahead of the directly matching outfits. The girls don’t look as much like they’re in Kindergarten and their mother dressed them identically. It’s a more creative way to embrace their ‘twin’-ness. I can’t say I love their dresses on their own, though–they’re cute, but they wouldn’t look half as interesting on just one Diva instead of two.
Poses: The poses are rather dull, and seem to just be based on them standing next to each other and switching positions slightly. I know there’s only so much you can do with two people in one shoot but this is astoundingly boring, like a cheesy family portrait.
Uniqueness: Brie and Nikki are dressed similarly! What a novel idea!
Grade: Bland. The duo photoshoots are quickly losing their shine. Just let Brie and Nikki do their own things–the results are much more interesting.
• Click to see the rest of the photoshoot.

Kelly Kelly‘s Enchanting
Appearance: Kelly’s wearing a long blue gown in a pretty aquamarine color. It’s pretty, but looks sort of out of place in a WWE photoshoot. Maybe if the dress was shorter or looked a bit more casual it wouldn’t look like Kelly was about to go to a ball or compete in a Miss America competition.
Poses: It’s your standard Kelly Kelly photoshoot, with not much going on around the face. She uses her arms and the rest of her body to make this a bit more interesting, but her posing still bears shades of a mannequin. The floor-length dress doesn’t do much to dispel that illusion.
Uniqueness: A Diva wearing a floor-length dress is something of an anomaly around these parts, I must say.
Grade: Bland. Kelly never seems to put much effort into making her photoshoots interesting. I don’t know why.. Maybe she’s just letting her looks do the talking.
• Click to see the rest of the photoshoot.

Maria‘s En Fuego
Appearance: It’s Maria, so we know a few things are for certain: there will be bright colors, bold prints, and a single glove. Check, check, and check. I can’t say a red leopard print vest is my cup of tea, but it certainly fits her style. The shiny black pants and silver heels keep the wild theme running, but somehow keep it grounded a bit with their neutral tones.
Poses: This is where the shoot goes off the tracks. I understand and appreciate the attempts to excite and surprise the viewer, but posing with a random fire extinguisher just looks odd, and balancing on a chair and the wall don’t look surreal in a Salvador Dali sort of way–it just looks kind of weird. To be fair, I’m always telling Divas to mix it up and makes things exciting, but I think this is taking that a bit too far and into the deep end. I don’t think the objective of a WWE shoot should be to get people gawking, like you’re modeling in a high fashion magazine or something.
Uniqueness: Well, it’s definitely unique. I’m sure that was the intent of this mess.
Grade: Bland. I appreciate her gumption, I really do. It’s just.. not unique in a good way–more of a head-scratching way.
• Click to see the rest of the photoshoot.

Read more to see the rest of this week’s photoshoots and vote for your favorite.

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Diva Dirt Style Jury: Week of October 19th, 2009

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ddstylejury

Welcome to the Diva Dirt Style Jury! No more are the separate ‘Best’ and ‘Worst’ lists, instead we have come up with a scientific approach *cough* to compiling our weekly fashion column. The Diva Dirt team will weigh in on the different looks from the week gone by & mark each look with a score out of ten. The look with the highest average score will be our best look and the look with the lowest average score will be the worst look. Click each photo to see the look in full size.

Let the proverbial runway show begin!

THE BELLA TWINS
Erin: Going for business casual? I guess they’re just trying to compliment Snoop’s dapper look, but it looks so faux-classy. But wait, is Brie wearing anything under her blazer? Okay, not even faux-classy. 4/10
Melanie: I don’t get how Snoop Dogg = business attire. Well at least we didn’t have the Divas coming out dressed as video vixens, no we’ll save that for when Flo Rida guest hosts. Like Erin, I felt this looked faux-classy rather than genuinely classy. I guess I just can’t buy the Bellas in this type of attire. 5/10
Steven: On their first week back on the Raw roster, The Bellas go for classy as opposed to trashy. They definitely look a lot better in darker colors than their usual bright  red. Good to see them leave the big ass flowers home, as well. 7/10

BETH PHOENIX
Erin: I like layering as much as the next person, but this is ridiculous. Cover up your bra, girl! 4/10
Melanie: Is Beth trying to pass on lingerie as an outfit? Good Lord… 2/10
Steven: Did the lights blow out in the Divas’ locker room, because Beth obviously got dressed in the dark this week. Did no one feel obligated to tell her that her bra was showing? The only thing saving The Glamazon from a 0/10, is the hair (which is looking great). 2/10

Read on for more of this week’s outfits and to see who’s been branded our winner and loser.

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Diva Dirt’s Topical Barometer: Highs & Lows for the Week of October 19th

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topicalbarometer
Key: Hot; this was well done. Tepid; this was middle of the road. Cold; this was miserable.

Diva Dirt prides itself on original content, which is why we have totally jacked a fabulous idea from Alan Carr — the topical barometer! Every week, we’ll be looking at the highs and lows and finding out where they rank on our topical barometer. What’s hot? What’s tepid? What’s cold?

topicalhot_102409supesTara & Kim Couture Altercation, Bound for Glory
Tara got a shock at Bound for Glory last Sunday when MMA fighter, Kim Couture showed up in the crowd! The duo got into an altercation that has lead to conflicting reports as to whether it was all an angle or whether it was real.
Verdict: Tepid. I thought the angle at Bound for Glory looked good and came across well, but the lack of follow-through and conflicting reports on what was going to happen here have lead this feud to drop from being ‘hot’ to ‘tepid’. Though TNA seems to have gone to the trouble of bringing in Kim Couture, none of the MMA press or wrestling press for that matter, were too favourable of the angle. Then there’s the lack of mention on TNA Impact also. It looks as though this was a one-shot deal that served very little purpose.

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topicalhot_102409supesDaffney Goes Through Barbed Wire Table, Bound for Glory
Fearless TNA Knockout, Daffney went through a barbed wire-laden table at Bound for Glory last weekend, marking yet another crazy bump that she has endured in the past year. Since joining TNA, Daffney has been part of several crazy spots and this one was perhaps the biggest yet.
Verdict: Hot. While I must be concerned for her health, for Daffney to take part in yet another spot of this caliber should be praised. This was a ‘holy shit’ moment that rivals some of the craziest spots performed by the male stars in WWE and TNA. Daffney truly does deserve an award for her fearless nature.

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topicalhot_102409supesDiva Dancers, Monday Night Raw
Welcome to Raw, Eve! It was disconcerting to see Divas that can wrestle like Eve Torres, Gail Kim and Kelly Kelly relegated to ‘Diva dancers’ on Raw, this past Monday. Serving as Snoop Dogg’s Diva escorts, Eve, Gail, Kelly and the Bella Twins danced in the ring with the hip hop star like video vixens.
Verdict: Cold. If you consider the wealth and talent that Eve and Gail have, it seems pathetic to rub them with the same brush as the Bella Twins. No offence to them, but the only reason they were brought to Raw was to serve as eye candy for the guest host of the week. On the other hand, Eve, Gail and Kelly have carved out decent careers as wrestlers and as such shouldn’t be treated as glorified dancers.

More after the cut:

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