Friday, February 3, 2023

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NXT Redux (September 14th, 2010): Knock Knock. Who’s There? Jamie. Jamie Who? Jamie Keyes, Your Next WWE Diva?

Last week during the season premiere of NXT, we were treated to a dominating performance by Naomi, a pretty decent performance by AJ Lee, and a dance contest. As seen on Monday Night Raw, dancing skills are must haves for all potential Divas! This week, the Divas got a chance to prove that they have a sense of humor by competing in an exhilarating joke telling contest. We also got two matches. Lots going on so lets get started.

NXT did NOT kicked off in its usual fashion with Matt Striker announcing the pros and rookies. Vickie Guerrero started us off tonight and she came out screaming “excuse me.” She said Kaitlyn embarrassed her last week so she decided to bring someone out this week that would make her proud. She announced her boyfriend, Intercontinental Champion Dolph Ziggler. Dolph, Vickie, and Kaitlyn make their way to the ring while a package of Vickie getting punked by AJ played. Zolph got ready for ring action and then helped Kaitlyn in the ring. Their opponents are AJ and Primo Colon.

Dolph and Primo begin the match and the guys start jockeying for position. Dolph struck Primo and Primo replied with a dropkick. Dolph didn’t appreciate that and he tagged in Kaitlyn. Kaitlyn didn’t seem to happy but she got in there anyway. As the rules of a mixed tag go, AJ had to come in. So she did.

Kaitlyn taunted AJ for a second and the Jersey girl wasn’t impressed. She motioned for Kaitlyn to come on, so they locked up. AJ got Kaitlyn around the midsection and ended up getting in her a quick pinning combination. Kaitlyn powered out. AJ applied a side headlock to Kaitlyn and the greenest rookie of them all tried to power out of it. AJ held firm until Kaitlyn was finally able to force the smaller woman into the ropes and knock her down with a clothesline. With AJ down, Kaitlyn decided to be smart and step across AJ’s midsection. She tried to pick “Pocket Rocket” up by the hair, but AJ responded with a kick to the skull and got up. Kaitlyn came rearing back but AJ pancaked her with a kick to the gut. AJ continued her onslaught with forearms to the face and a kick, before running to the ropes and flying at Kaitlyn with a crossbody. Kaitlyn caught her like she was supposed too (and set it up so we could see how choreographed it was, haha) and fell back, with allowed AJ to hook the leg and try for a pin. Kaitlyn kicked out, got to her feet, and snapped AJ in half with a clothesline. She made the tag to Dolph.

Dolph got in the ring and knocked Primo off the apron with a cheap shot. That left him alone in the ring with AJ. He toyed and taunted her, but AJ wasn’t scared. She fired back at Dolph with some wicked shots and sent him tumbling down to the mat. Love it! Dolph was pretty pissed at having his ass beat by a girl and AJ made the tag to her pro. Primo came roaring in off the top rope and sent the IC Champ crashing to the canvas. What followed was some gymnastics into a dropkick that took down Dolph as well. Primo tossed the blond headed piece of man candy into the corner and started punching him. Dolph ended up reversing a whip to the opposite corner but he was unable to capitalize because Primo caught him with a clothesline. Dolph got to his feet eventually but Primo used a legsweep to get him down again and go for the cover. Dolph was able to kick out.

Dolph crawled over to the corner and helped himself up. Primo came running to him but Dolph moved just in time! He also managed to get Primo sucked into his finisher, The Zig Zag. Poor Primo. He never saw it coming. Dolph got the three count and scored a huge win for Kaitlyn. After the match, Kaitlyn and Dolph started to celebrate. On the outside, Vickie was happy. But then the mood shifted. Kaitlyn leaped into Dolph’s arms and they hugged. And hugged. And hugged. Vickie started to glare at the happy tag team in the ring and she started to walk off. Kaitlyn and Dolph didn’t seem to care. They just kept embracing. The cameras cut to Josh Matthews and Michael Cole and they spent a few seconds speculating about why Vickie seemed so unhappy. A comment was made that Vickie and Kaitlyn need to get on the same page like the way Alicia Fox and her rookie, Maxine, have.

Maxine’s video package started to play.

Maxine introduced herself as the next WWE Diva and let us know that she came from a large family. She’s part Spanish, Cuban, Italian, Chinese, and Hawaiian. She went to school for criminology and worked for on-scene investigations for the state attorneys. Maxine said she did modeling on the side for several years because she grew up around the camera and then went on to say that her greatest feature are her eyes. She said that she loved to dance, especially Salsa, and that she was a very strong minded woman. Maxine said we don’t want to step on her because she’ll be our best friend until we become her enemy. She continued by saying that all she wanted was power so she count control everything. Sexiness won’t get you everywhere, but power will. Maxine really wants to be the next WWE Diva because it’s important to her and she will do whatever it takes to make it happen. She said the other girls need a new dream.

The first challenge of the night, a Joke Off, will take place after the break.

When the show returned, Striker was finally in the ring! Kaitlyn and AJ were standing beside him. He introduced the rest of the season three rookies. Aksana, Jamie Keyes, Maxine, and Naomi walked out. A highlight package of Naomi’s dominance played. Striker began with a speech, blah blah. He’s really hot. He reminded us that the Diva who wins the most challenges will be immune from the first elimination in three weeks. He said that tonight the girls had a unique opportunity to entertain the WWE Universe by telling a joke. Whoever told the best/funniest joke would win. The live audience would be the judge.

AJ went first. Needless to say she bombed. Aksana was second. She told a popular joke from Lithuania. She directed it at Maxine. She was perfection. Too bad I’m the only one who liked it. Jamie and her well rehearsed self went third. She was actually really great. Loved it. Naomi was fourth.


“What do you call a dog with no legs?”

I don’t know, Naomi. What?

“It doesn’t matter what you call it because it a’int gunna come to ya.”


Maxine was second to last. She said that everyone in the ring with her was a joke. She picked one and went to AJ. She grabbed her by the face and started to harass her. She gave AJ a twenty and told her to go to the back and get her something minty. AJ threw the money (which Naomi picked up and pocketed) and a catfight broke out. Striker got all up in the middle of it and attempted to break it up, but he needed the help of everyone else. Then he promptly declared that he loved his job once things called down. Kaitlyn was last. She was hilarious and everyone thought it was hilarious, except for AJ who was the butt of it. Needless to say, AJ got in another fight. Striker got to grope Kaitlyn. I’m jealous, yet happy all at the same time.

Striker told the crowd to pick a winner and it was really a no contest. Jamie took the victory and while everyone was celebrating in the ring, Cole got up and started beating on a gong. He told all the rookie Divas, Striker, the crowd, and said the whole show should be “gonged.” He began to beat on the gong and never stopped, even after the next match of the night was previewed (a one-on-one between Aksana and Jamie) and NXT went to commercial.

The show returned with Brie and Nikki Bella walking to the ring to join Jamie. After they were done, Goldust came to the ring to join Aksana. The bell rang for the match to begin and Jamie immediately began to work over Aksana’s left arm. The nice exchange eventually shifted momentum when Aksana applied a side headlock to Jamie. Jamie punched Aksana in the kidneys to get her to release the hold and Aksana sent her into the ropes. When Jamie came back, Aksana knocked her down with a clothesline. Jamie gingerly got back up to her feet and when she did, Aksana was waiting. She powerslammed the Sarasota native back down to the ground and went to the ropes. She used them for momentum to drop an elbow to Jamie, but the ex-cheerleader was able to move out of the way and get back to her feet. Aksana rolled around in pain and Jamie went back to work on the left arm, forcing Aksana chest first into the corner.

Jamie continued her offense but eventually Aksana made it to the ropes and Jamie had no choice but to break the hold. Aksana pushed her away and that really insulted Jamie. Jamie pushed her back and the estrogen started to flow. Jamie and Aksana started battling for position and finally Aksana brought the Floridian down. Aksana picked up the pace with a few clothesline takedowns and a stiff knee to the jaw. She followed it up with forearms and tossed Jamie into the corner. When Aksana went in for more damage, Jamie rolled her up. Of course Aksana was magically unable to kick out and Jamie got her first win on NXT. Jamie celebrated with the Bellas while Goldust consoled a pouty Aksana.

A video package for Naomi played next.

Naomi introduced herself and described her personality as spunky, sporty, and spontaneous. She grew up with four brothers and that prepared her well for the WWE. Naomi has been dancing since the age of ten, but by the time she turned 18, she was no longer elibiable to compete. That was when she began her career as an Orlando Magic dancer. In addition to that, she was a Dunkin’ Dancer and they showed some sick footage of her dunking a basketball after flying off a trampoline. Amazing. Naomi said she has a lot to show WWE fans. She’s not just a dancer. She said she will stand out by doing everything she knows they can’t do. She said no one else has her athletic ability and can perform like her, and she thinks real WWE fans will appreciate that. (She’s right.) Naomi’s message to the other Divas is for them to bring their “A” game.

The second challenge of the night is next. It will be an obstacle course. NXT goes to yet another commercial break.

The show returned with a bunch of crap that doesn’t really matter. The Night of Champions card was recapped, and then Cole and Matthews highlighted what happened between Dolph and Kaitlyn earlier that night. They quickly cut to the backstage area where Dolph and Kaitlyn are standing and talking. Kaitlyn said she is really excited about her first win and Dolph said something about how he is a big deal. They’re standing really close together when Vickie showed up. She praised them both for doing a swell job and the politely asked Kaitlyn to excuse her. Kaitlyn went to leave, but she turned around one last time to thank Dolph for getting the win. Vickie screeched and Kaitlyn hurridly walked away. Dolph asked Vickie what the deal was and Vickie demanded to know what was going on between him and Kaitlyn. Dolph said that nothing was going on but Vickie accused them of being all over each other. Dolph kind of defended Kaitlyn by saying that she was just excited because it was her first win. He’s used to it but it’s a whole new territory for Kaitlyn. Vickie got up in her man’s grill and told Dolph that if that ever happened again, he was going to lose all this. She made some funky hand motions to go with it. Beautiful.

The obstacle course is set up at ringside but of course, the show goes to commercial break.

When it returned, Striker explained how the obstacle course would work. When he was finished he told Kaitlyn that she was going to go first. Kaitlyn said “why am I always first” but nonetheless, she got ready. She blew a kiss to AJ and right as Striker was about to give her the signal to take off, Vickie interrupted. And yes. She was in a track suit.

Oh man.

Vickie told Kaitlyn that since she was horrible last week and used Dolph tonight, that she had no choice but to win this competition. Vickie said she was the best pro this season and was going to show Kaitlyn how to win. Needless to say, it was an epic fail. But Vickie drew some awesome heat during her pre-run warmup. She also had a brilliant tantrum mid-way through. She finished at 1:27. Awesome.

The show went to commercial.

When it returned for what was the final time, the other girls took their turn at the obstacle course.

Kaitlyn: 36.5
Naomi: 57.4
Maxine: 39.05
Jamie: 36.7
AJ: 46.0
Aksana: 37.2

Kaitlyn won the competition thanks to the referee miscounting AJ’s push-ups and Naomi being scripted to throw it. No other way to describe that. Vickie came out and was all smiles since Kaitlyn won. They hugged and celebrated and unfortunately, Cole started to beat the gong again. He got on the microphone and said the whole show was ridiculous. He went on a douchebag rant. He got heat. He quit NXT.

Thank you, Jesus/God/Allah/Buddha.

Everyone told him goodbye. He will not be missed.

Tonight’s show was fun, yet telling in so many ways. In one week Kaitlyn has managed to get herself over with management. She was the star tonight and I don’t have a problem with that. Her backstage segment with Dolph was fun and I wouldn’t mind seeing a nice love triangle develop. Whatever gives me a chance to see a Vickie mental breakdown. Love it.

Naomi is the clear cut stud. Her performance in the obstacle course made me so sad. She clearly threw it because that’s how it was written. But still, so so sad. Girl is ripped and can rock some light blue.

Jamie has a personality! She was so good tonight. Way better than last week. I really enjoyed her joke and appreciated her work in the ring.

AJ is a terrible actress. I wasn’t buying her at all tonight. I don’t know why the WWE is forcing her to be this spunky, spitfire face character. She’s not pulling it off. She’s coming across as fake and I really can’t take her seriously right now. Loved her beating the snot out of Dolph though.

Aksana lost again but her ring work was a lot better this week. She bumped well and there were no botches. I thought she worked really well with Jamie and I wouldn’t mind seeing another match between the two of them.

That said, between the two matches tonight we got to see how limited the girls are in the ring. Both matches were the same. They consisted of basic wear downs, clotheslines, and side headlocks. I’m not sure if anyone is main roster ready at this point, but it’s not like the WWE does any justice to their girls. We have a title unification match for Night of Champions that hasn’t even been mentioned since last Friday’s SmackDown. Last night, we got a sing and dance off. Whatever.

NXT was another decent show, and better than last week in my opinion. We didn’t see jaw dropping wrestling, but when do we ever? I have a  low standard for the WWE and tonight they met that standard and went a little above. I could have done without all the Michael Cole focus, but if we don’t have to listen to him next week then I’ll consider it worth it. Sound off in comments about what you think!

Cryssi… out.

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