Welcome to the Diva Dirt Style Jury! No more are the separate ‘Best’ and ‘Worst’ lists, instead we have come up with a scientific approach *cough* to compiling our weekly fashion column. The Diva Dirt team will weigh in on the different looks from the week gone by & mark each look with a score out of ten. The look with the highest average score will be our best look and the look with the lowest average score will be the worst look. Click each photo to see the look in full size.
Let the proverbial runway show begin!
THE BELLA TWINS
Erin: Going for business casual? I guess they’re just trying to compliment Snoop’s dapper look, but it looks so faux-classy. But wait, is Brie wearing anything under her blazer? Okay, not even faux-classy. 4/10
Melanie: I don’t get how Snoop Dogg = business attire. Well at least we didn’t have the Divas coming out dressed as video vixens, no we’ll save that for when Flo Rida guest hosts. Like Erin, I felt this looked faux-classy rather than genuinely classy. I guess I just can’t buy the Bellas in this type of attire. 5/10
Steven: On their first week back on the Raw roster, The Bellas go for classy as opposed to trashy. They definitely look a lot better in darker colors than their usual bright red. Good to see them leave the big ass flowers home, as well. 7/10
Erin: I like layering as much as the next person, but this is ridiculous. Cover up your bra, girl! 4/10
Melanie: Is Beth trying to pass on lingerie as an outfit? Good Lord… 2/10
Steven: Did the lights blow out in the Divas’ locker room, because Beth obviously got dressed in the dark this week. Did no one feel obligated to tell her that her bra was showing? The only thing saving The Glamazon from a 0/10, is the hair (which is looking great). 2/10
Read on for more of this week’s outfits and to see who’s been branded our winner and loser.
Erin: Another “business sexy” look. This one isn’t as bad as the Bellas’ looks, but it still looks cheap as hell. Have any of these girls actually been inside an office? 5/10
Melanie: Like the Bellas, this just doesn’t come across as a natural fit for Eve. She looks stiff and uncomfortable to be honest. 5/10
Steven: Did Eve trip and fall into Tiffany’s closet on her way to Raw? I know she’s going for the classy look, but she kinda reminds me of a secretary. On the plus side, the skirt fits her really nicely. 6/10
GAIL KIM #1
Erin: Simple and sexy. Gail’s showing the other girls that Divas can be a glorified escort for a GM and still dress themselves coherently. The cut at the neck is gives the all-black dress *just* enough excitement. 8/10
Melanie: I really like this! Gail looks super sleek and sexy. Black dresses can be very mundane but I think the little strap around the neck makes it less so. 8/10
Steven: Not much to say here. Gail looks great, but the dress is a little boring. 6/10
GAIL KIM #2
Erin: I gotta be honest. At first, I thought she was recycling her referee outfit from a few weeks back. I like stripes a lot, but in this fashion is looks a little too referee-ish. Maybe if it wasn’t all monochrome? 6/10
Melanie: I like this but not as much as the Raw look. The top does look rather referee-like, but it’s still a solid look. 6/10
Steven: I’m usually very anti-sequins, but Gail made it work this week. Sure, it’s the same old gear she always wears, but the black and silver really made it pop. 7/10
Erin: This is very Britney-ish.. In fact, I’ve probably seen her wear something exactly like this. But that’s probably the point. Fact is, Britney didn’t look good in it, and neither does Jillian. The color just doesn’t look right against her skin. 5/10
Melanie: Flesh coloured outfit on someone with bleach blonde hair also isn’t working for me. 3/10
Steven: Looks like ‘Lil’ Jilly’ took a page out of her idol’s book this week. I like the flesh-tone/rhinestone combo and I doubt any other Diva could pull off this look. 8/10
Erin: As is well docutmented here, I love gray, so I like the top. Also, it’s long enough that the tights don’t look like makeshift pants. To quote the show Popular, it’s “Very Gwyneth.” Paltrow, that is.. 8/10
Melanie: Love it! Kelly is looking very mature, sexy and glamorous while remaining youthful compared to her fellow Divas who opted for casual black. This for me, is just perfect for her and it gets my first ever… 10/10
Steven: K2 is looking smoking hot this week. The color of the top really looks great on her. I’m just glad she decided to wear tights, instead of trying to pass that top off as a dress. 9/10
Erin: The pink/coral-ish color is super cute. The cut is her usual ring style, so I guess the only way to judge it is by its coloring, which I’ve already said I liked. But is it almost <i>too</i> cute-sy for Layla? Hm… 7/10
Melanie: Cute but not loving it. Layla’s outfits work best when they are bright and bold [like electric blue or scarlet red], they just pop off her and look smoking. This is just a little too blah for her. 5/10
Steven: Nice to see Layla adding some depth to her usual gear, but she made the same mistake as Rosa did last week. The baby pink just doesn’t work with her skin tone. Otherwise, a great outfit. 7/10
Erin: Not feeling the microfilament-esque top over her bra. It looks like it could tear at any moment. 5/10
Melanie: Michelle seems to be opting for these low cut tops a lot and while the grey one last week had a ho-hum quality about it that made it work, this one is just a little too “Look at me, look at me” and doesn’t have the same refined class/simplicity as the top last week. Not loving it, Michelle. 5/10
Steven: Once again, Michelle pulls off a stylish ensemble. The top is a little too skimpy for my taste, and the sequins gotta go, but besides that I like it. Not 10/10 material, but it came pretty close. 8/10
So, how did the girls score? Let’s put our scores through our highly scientific “Ensemble Classification Calculationomagraphier”® and see who we’ve deemed this week’s winner and loser. The following is in ascending order by their calculated score:
Beth Phoenix: 8/30
The Bella Twins: 16/30
Eve Torres: 16/30
Michelle McCool: 18/30
Gail Kim #2: 19/30
Gail Kim #1: 22/30
Kelly Kelly: 28/30
LOSER: BETH PHOENIX. Hey Beth, your bra’s showing.
WINNER: KELLY KELLY. Kelly Kelly isn’t that naive young girl anymore!
Thoughts? Complaints? Conspiracy theories? As always, let us know in the comments!