Saturday, December 2, 2023

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Missy Hyatt’s Million Dollar Manifesto

Over at, Missy Hyatt spoke on Vince McMahon’s “Million Dollar Giveaway”, revealing that she’s entered the contest herself and even writing a “Million Dollar Manifesto” specifying just what she’d do with all that money:

1. I’m paying Jakks to produce 500 limited edition Missy Hyatt Legends Figures. I will than sell them on ebay.
2. I’m buying my own indy promotion to brutalize ticket sellers, stooges, and hanger ons. I will also make myself the champion.
3. I will have Chikara create a masked Missy Hyatt character
4. I’m going to pay WWE for the right to induct Terry Funk in the WWE Hall Of Fame and manage him at Wrestle Mania.
5. I’m going to pay TNA to allow me to steal Black Machismo from So Cal Val at their wedding.
6. I’m going to get a internet radio program on or sirius radio
7. I’m going to get Luna Vachon‘s neck fixed. That way I can team up with her. [Luna will be doing all the work in the ring. Just don’t tell her].
8. Pay Amy Lee to be my body guard/enforcer. Lets see if any promotion got the balls to try to throw Amy Lee out!
9. Buy Terry Funk new knees and hips. That way Funk can give us another twenty years of great matches.
10. A million dollars worth of dog kibble to feed all the hungry Jack Russell’s of the world.

Hm.. Missy’s pretty generous towards Terry Funk – Luna too. And making her own indy promotion to lord over? Sounds like a ripe idea to me! So, what would you do with the money? I personally can’t even fathom having that kind of money to burn..

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