Thursday, March 28, 2024

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Raw Redux (Sept. 28th, 2009) – Rosa is a Beautiful Nightmare

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Somebody pinch me, this match is too bad to be true. When it comes to backing horses, those of you who went with a fake blonde maned stallion named ‘Rosa Mendes‘, I’m sorry to break this to you — you’re out of pocket. Her match last night, her first in a long time [I wonder why] was peer-through-your-hands car crash television. In some ways actually, twas quite amusing. If this was a comedy, I certainly got my money’s worth with a few chuckles at Rosa’s expense. As beautiful as she is, she is just not good in the ring. Divas Champion, Mickie James, who seems to have an iffy chemistry with most wasn’t at the top of her game. Meanwhile No. 1 Contender, Alicia Fox looked hot at ringside & as dirty, pervy uncle Jerry Lawler put it: “How can evil look that good?”

As one reader pointed out, Mickie has had a longer working week than usual so was bound to be a little tired come Monday on Raw. That said, I can’t help but feel her chemistry somewhat lacks with certain opponents and I think Rosa is the latest name to add to that list. Then again, does Rosa have chemistry with anyone? To Rosa’s credit, I felt her selling was much stronger than before, especially at the end when she took the Long Kiss Goodnight. What’s not to Rosa’s credit, is the awful timing that was so painstakingly apparent — a girl does not just sit on you, Rosa.

We start off with a decent takedown by Mickie, into a leg scissors lock counter by Rosa. On commentary, we get the usual “I spoke to XYZ earlier today…” I’m sure you did, Michael Cole. Mickie comes back and hits an arm drag on Rosa & applies an arm lock, Rosa with a knee to Mickie and throws her in the corner but Mickie manages to stop herself. Rosa runs at Mickie, Mickie jumps over her and ends up kinda sitting on top of her. Lulz #1. Mickie hits a dropkick and then a single legged kick as Rosa kinda falls back and it looks silly. Lulz #2. At ringside, Alicia Fox exudes diva attitude [in the Maria sense] commanding Mickie’s attention, allowing Rosa to counter what I expect was a DDT. It doesn’t work however and she gets hit with a neckbreaker anyway.

A few forearms blah blah, Rosa begins to mount a comeback, grabbing Mickie by the hair and slamming her down. Rosa kicks Mickie in the back and apparently that is enough to put her away as she goes for the cover, err… Rosa then applies what is becoming her patented knee stretch. Another shot of the gorgeous Foxy at ringside, as she wills on Rosa & shoots a smirk at Mickie. Mickie mounts her comeback but is pushed into the corner as Rosa begins pounding into her with her shoulders. Mickie hits a nice legscissors which is sold well by Rosa. Rosa throws Mickie at the ropes, she slides through and then goes for a Thesz Press and Rosa just stays standing & Mickie ends up modifying it into a takeover. Lulz #3 & 4.

Alicia is up on the apron, Mickie grabs her hair, Rosa launches at her for a rope hanger thing but Mickie moves out of the way. Lulz #5 & 6 ensue as Rosa kinda buckles on the ropes and I’m pretty sure she hurt her vajayjay. Damn! Mickie hits an awesome Long Kiss Goodnight for the win.

A staredown between Mickie & Alicia, as we look forward to Hell in a Cell on Sunday. Oh man, I think ‘beautiful nightmare’ describes Rosa perfectly. Where was Jillian?

I’m utterly looking forward to Mickie & Alicia’s match this Sunday, I just hope the chemistry is there, we haven’t really seen them square off too much. They have been working together a lot this past week on the overseas tour, so let’s hope they become familiar with themselves by the pay per view. Alicia has come along so nicely, her in-ring ability is there and now she’s exuding a lot of that personality we saw in that post-Bash interview with Michelle McCool. [“OHMAGAWDDDD”] When she was first moved to Raw, I was certain she’d get lost in the shuffle with the Beths and Maryses, I didn’t think she’d rise to the top on this particular brand — especially this soon. If this were Twitter, I’d sign off this message with: #TeamFox

Random observation: I wonder how much hate mail we’ll get from Rosa marks?

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