Monday, July 22, 2024

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Results: IIconic Riots and Never-Ending Stories

Hello, readers!

Mykel is back with another recap, and as always, nothing is ever in sequential order.

We start off with seeing the Iconic Duo, ahem, IIconics hijack the pre-show panel. They were also curiously in their wrestling gear…hmm. They also weighed in on the women’s title match, and are firmly on the Mella Money Train. However, I felt like Booker T at the end, “What the hell was that!”.

We also see Paige make an appearance for a GM Q&A where she explained why she didn’t hand out Absolution title matches, as she felt they weren’t yet earned, wash, rinse, repeat from Tuesday.

Following up, we have entry 3,495,030 in the Sasha-Bayley saga, which has dragged on more than that Twilight book “New Moon” when Bella went all emo for what felt as long as my high school career when Edward dumped her. Anyway, Bayley asks Sasha to be in her corner, the idea Banks scoffs at and tells her to go alone, cue awkward angry faces.

Finally, we have our only match on the show! Riott has her lackies, I mean, “squadmates” in tow, and the narrative of the match was Bayley being discombobulated after whacking her head on the second turnbuckle, which caused her to make a few mistakes, you know, because they never hit their heads on the turnbuckle and come back fine. Anyway, Bayley was urgent in the beginning- landing beautiful pinning combinations, and then Ruby took over and beat her from pillar to post like she stole the last cremation number five charcoal lipstick from Ruby’s makeup kit. However, late in the match, Bayley mounted a comeback, complete with a nice hurricanrana to Miss Sarah Logan… only to fall to the numbers game while The Boss watched backstage, mean-mugging like I do whenever I see that awful hair color back on her head.

Thoughts: Grade C. The match was good for what it was, but it wasn’t all that. The star in all this is Ruby, she’s fresh, and she puts the bad in badass on her looks alone, but can back it up in the ring. She’s to WWE what Christine Von Eerie should have been to TNA. The IIconics honestly, though confident on the mic, and clearly charismatic, didn’t do it for me again in their segment. The impersonations were funny the first week, but now, much like Sunny in WWE’s good graces, it’s worn out it’s welcome. Sasha and Bayley, I’m so over it. There have been so many missed opportunities and WWE can’t seem to carry a feud even if someone double-bagged it. However, Sasha being Angry Spice was the most convincing she’s looked whilst talking in a while, so kudos, and I’ll give Bayley her props. She went from being “afraid to go extreme”, to having a backbone and rising out of her burial like a zombie in Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” video. However, I wasn’t overall impressed with the show. The spotlights on the women’s title matches was well done, however!

Did this pre-show make the grade? What are your thoughts?

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