Thursday, March 28, 2024

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TNA Victory Road in Review: The Loco Latinas Spice Up the Gold!

If only the road to victory were always paved with gold. This past Thursday on Impact, we saw a six way match between The Beautiful People, Angelina Love and Velvet Sky teaming up with Winter to take on Cookie, Sarita and Angelina Pivarnick of the Jersey Shore. Yeah. That’s what I said..however, thankfully, TBP and Winter survived and now, the real Angelina and Winter must team up to defend their coveted TNA Knockouts Tag Team Championships. Who are their opponents, you ask? Well, only the Loco Latinas, Sarita and Rosita of course! I know you’re ready for this and I can say that I’m ready for this. So let’s do this!

The Knockouts action for the evening begins with a backstage segment with The Beautiful People and Winter, interviewed by Christy Hemme. The resident backstage redhead congratulates Velvet Sky on her win over Sarita and maintaining her spot with the company. She also points out that what seems the most surprising is not that win but the fact that Winter actually defended Velvet this past Thursday on Impact. Winter states that her actions last week proved that all she has ever wanted is for all of them to have friends. She says she doesn’t have an issue with Velvet but Velvet has an issue with her. She is just glad that Angelina has finally seen it all too. She is totally jealous of those leggings you’re rocking, Winter. I mean, who wouldn’t be? Velvet can’t believe it but given how Angelina just walked away, I’m wondering if she’s starting to as well… (Apologies for the lack of video).

Out first, with a shimmy salsa and fiery flip are the cousins, Rosita and Sarita. Both are decked out in gold and black, predicting their future perhaps? They move and swivel their hips down to the ring, jumping over the top rope to live it up on the mat. Quick on the draw, Sarita is handed a microphone by SoCal Val and it is time for a little pre-match trash talk. Just a little note, I’m loving Sarita’s hair. She states that tonight is a great night because she and Rosita are walking out of the ring as the Knockout Tag Team Champions. Sarita claims that she doesn’t know about the kinky love triangle going on between TBP and Winter. She says they are not focused and then starts rambling off in spanish. I’m sure I could decipher it if I took the time but my time is precious at this moment. Haha. I’m sure it was really important. Really.

Just know that Sarita says toward the end that she is bringing the titles home for Mexico. Viva La Mexico! I could say something about that but I’ll keep my mouth shut. Out last are the team of Angelina Love and Winter to the theme of TBP(odd huh?), dressed like some sort of sultry ninja and a nightstalker. I have no idea what’s going on with that getup. I’ve learned not to question Winter’s motives. Anyway, Angelina sticks to her nature and LETS THE PIGEONS LOOSE!…while Winter looks like she’s about to hit up an Olivia Newton John music video. Oh lets get physical. Physical!

These four women are definitely about to get physical and I’m curious to see how it works out. Starting things off first are Angelina and little Rosita, curcling each other in the ring before the lockup. Angelina gets the upperhand with a side headlock until Rosita throws in the elbows, pushing A. Love into the ropes. Bring up the rebound with a shoulder block then off to the other side to come back with a flying clothesline. Quick on the taunt, Angelina gives Rosita just enough time to get over to the corner to tag in Sarita, who comes in to a nice hip toss across the ring. She wobbles over to the opposite corner and Winter gets right in her face, causing to back off quick. I’d probably be scared too, Sarita. El Chupacabra!

Turn about she goes into a nice snap suplex from Angelina Love but Sarita’s run in the ring doesn’t last long. Rosita tags in and becomes victim of a drop toe hold while A. Love tags in her partner. Winter pounces into the ring and throws a feisty back elbow into little Rosita, vicious on the attack. A nice backbreaker across the knee and Winter goes for the first pin of the match, getting a two count. Rosita is quick to kick out and crawl to the corner, tagging in Sarita who comes into a flapjack from Winter. A very quick back and forth exchange before Winter lands a nice northern lights suplex bridge, going for another pin but Rosita sweeps in, taking out Winter’s leg to break it up. I think I just got a case of whiplash. I had to blink a few times to keep up with that one.

Winter wrenches Sarita into a nice side headlock and drags her over to the corner, tagging in Angelina. Love comes in with a kick to Sarita’s ribcage but gets taken down and dragged to the other side before momentum can pick up. In an odd attempt at a tag team maneuver, Rosita crawls up on top of Sarita’s shoulders and they set up for a dropping crossbody but instead, little Rosita gets dropped on her face when Angelina rolls out of the way. Sarita gets knocked to the outside and Angelina picks Rosita up, dropping her down with authority. Another pin attempt and another two count gets us yet another tag to Winter. It’s like riding a carousel. They just keep going around and around and around. Let me also point out that the crowd is now starting up a USA chant and I found it funny because Angelina is Canadian, Winter is British and Sarita and Rosita are portrayed as Mexicana. Mhmmm.

Winter is in, giving a quick kick to Rosita and tosses her into the ropes, going for a back heel kick but Rosita trips her up, tagging in Sarita. Across the ring and Sarita rebounds, coming back fast with a dropkick….right to little Rosita. So much for the teamwork effort, huh? Winter takes advantage and wrenches the arm of Sarita, flipping her over harsh. Yet another tag and Angelina Love is back in, keep each other fresh and clean. Still working on that arm, Angelina finally gets thrown across the ring, receiving a punk shot from Rosita from the outside. Tag on the Latina side and Rosita goes for that flipping leg drop but Angelina slides out, coming right back after her. A nice jawbreaker against the shoulder and Angelina goes for another pin attempt. A little slow on the take there with the attempted Sarita breakup. Enter slow motion action here.

The official orders Sarita out as Angelina gets Winter back into the match. A nice firewoman’s carry from Winter on Rosita and Angelina gets in a swift bicycle kick into the temple. Winter in for the pin but Sarita is up to her old cheating ways. She causes a distraction, gets Angelina in trouble and then creeps out, going for one of the tag team titles. Sarita brings in one of the belts but Angelina catches her quick, knocking her out of the ring. However, the belt lays center of gravity and Rosita picks it up, ready to use it against Winter, who has her back turned. The crowd is hyped up and just as soon as the noise becomes louder, Velvet Sky slides into the ring out of nowhere, snatching the belt from Rosita’s grubby hands. Oh no no no, she says and gets out of the ring with the title.

Winter goes in for the roll-up and it looks like she might have it but Sarita stalks her way back in, flipping the two women over which leaves Rosita on top. Oh geez. The referee catches attention and counts the three, which gives the straps of gold new owners. Angelina and Winter cannot believe it and neither can Velvet. She calls Winter a spaz and tells her to chill out but Angelina is more upset than anyone. She doesn’t even look at Velvet as she storms to the backstage area, Winter in tow. Both women are still arguing over what just occured but all I know is….

The winners of this match and NEW TNA Knockouts Tag Team Champions, Sarita and Rosita!

Thoughts: Well, it wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be. I say that because Rosita is still so green when it comes to her in-ring ability and it just seems like Sarita has to carry her through matches. I get it. She’s new. She is also very, very tiny. I do have to say though that I was highly impressed with the chemistry that Winter and Angelina have as tag team partners. They make a great team and their dynamic is incredible. I’m hoping that Sarita and Rosita are able to come by some of that chemistry in their run as champions. It’s nice to see Sarita with gold around her waist again. It isn’t the Knockouts title but it comes in a close second. I am curious to see where this leaves TBP but I am sure we will find out soon. Major congratulations to the Loco Latinas on their win.

Match Rating: 3.5/5

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