Thursday, March 28, 2024

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Total Divas Redux: “Eggs Over Freezing”

So my entire plan is to get my life together and my motivation back so I can get these things written up in a timely matter. Unfortunately, more often than not, my job leaves me stressed out and drained by the time Monday rolls around, and a one day weekend just isn’t enough. That’s why this Total Divas recap is late, and for that I sincerely apologize. But you know, just settling into your third promotion in the last seven months is hard, and the struggle to be an overachiever at your job is indeed real. In wrestling terms, I suppose I’m being pushed. I’m being groomed for that next level, and that next big step, and one thing I’m looking forward to seeing on this season of Total Divas is the behind the scenes look at the rise of the Bella twins and how they handled the build up to the push they are currently getting on television.

This season looks great, to be honest, and for that I’m overjoyed because I was not impressed with Rosa Mendes being added to the cast and I still haven’t been able to watch last season’s finale. I just lost my care, to be fair. Too much “Nena” drama. I’m tired of John Cena‘s excuses as to why he won’t just marry and give Nikki Bella what she wants. I know he’s broken and damaged, and has screwed up views on marriage – hell, I do too – but she’s more than proven herself to him. I’m over Brother Bella, and the Funkadactyls, and Summer Rae didn’t really bring much to last season. And now thanks to Summer shooting a movie, we’re going to have to Rosa, and that’s way too many Divas.

But hey, like I said, the previews made the season look good so I went into episode one with an open mind. I’m not going to say it was the longest hour of my life, because it wasn’t. It was a great premiere that ended with a cliffhanger and honestly, Rosa kind of stole the show for me. Lets jump right on in.

The big story was Rosa returning to the WWE after about a year and half. It was revealed that in addition to going through rehab, Rosa also had her boobs done, and I’ll be honest, she looked really pretty. Obviously her return was met with some drama, and our friend backstage, Mark Carrano, even went as far to ask Natalya if she should be a big sister to Rosa on the road and look out for her. Nattie didn’t appreciate being a babysitter, but she sucked it up and did her job, and turns out, Rosa really needed the support.

When she got wind that she was going to have a match, some of the other divas decided to poke fun at her, including our beloved Naomi. Rosa, obviously, was upset because she’s been through far to much in her life to deal with that, and Natalya was right there to pick up the pieces. She provided much needed moral support and gave us all a glimpse of what Total Divas is going to be like with Rosa around.

I already eluded to the fact that all the “Nena” drama got on my nerves last season, and it continued over into this episode. BUT, it was a different kind of drama, I guess. After going to lunch with Brie, damn Brother Bella, and his gorgeous wife (seriously, she is flawless), Lola, Nikki decided she was going to freeze her eggs. It was a suggestion she had gotten from Brie, after a conversation Nikki had with John when he asked her if marriage would be enough. Apparently, Nikki has always wanted to be a mother and Brie didn’t want to see her twin give up on that dream. The baby fever talk at lunch, and hearing JJ and Lola talk about how they’ve stopped taking precautions to prevent a pregnancy seemed to cement Nikki’s decision and with Brie’s moral support, Nikki started the process.

Apparently a lot goes into freezing your eggs, and at one point, Nikki had to sneak the nurse into her home and away from John, because she made the decision not to tell him right away. Things got even more complicated for Nikki when she was given injections to give herself in preparation for the surgery, and when Brie asked her how she was going to hide them, Nikki said she would just put them in her purse. Well of course, John ended up finding the shots, and we were left with him demanding to know what was going on as the episode ended.

Le sigh.

At least when Eva Marie went to visit her family, things didn’t get to terribly crazy this time. Eva came back home bearing good news this time, letting her family know that she and Jonathan had decided to have a traditional wedding. Obviously, Eva’s dad was incredibly happy about the news because was going to get a chance to walk his little girl down the aisle, but the happiness was short lived when Eva revealed her engagement/save the date, bedroom style photos.

The family weren’t that impressed, but they didn’t give them to hard of a time. What spoiled the moment was when Eva and Jonathan told them that it wasn’t going to be a traditional Catholic wedding. Jonathan isn’t Catholic and isn’t interested in converting because of how strong his own faith is, and when Eva saw how much having a Catholic wedding meant to her dad, she found herself completely torn.

Things got worse for our favorite red head when her mother told her that her dad was taking chemo shots. He had cancer back when Eva was fifteen, and as far as she knew, everything was in remission. She was obviously upset that she wasn’t told, despite the fact it was her dad’s wishes to not worry her with it, and that made her determined to have a traditional wedding to make her father happy. When the episode closed, Eva wasn’t sure how she was going to convince Jonathan to go along with the wedding idea, but making her dad happy was her top priority.

I really did enjoy this episode. Rosa may actually add some interesting elements to show, unlike the addition of Summer Rae last season. I like the fact that Nikki wasn’t completely ready to let go of the idea of having kids despite the fact John doesn’t want them. And I like that Eva’s family seems to have come around to Jonathan and is being more supportive of that relationship. It wasn’t the best episode ever, but premieres aren’t supposed to be. They’re put out there to plant the seeds for the rest of the season and that’s exactly what we got.

Hidden gems

And, most importantly, we got some hidden gems! I’m not going to rank them, because honestly, I’m not sure how many I’ve got. But hidden gems are those perfect little hilarious moments that have no bearing on anything, but make me giggle hysterically.

• When Rosa had her first match back in over a year, and happened to hear a conversation between Eva and Naomi; Naomi had the nerve to say “get the popcorn”, meaning that match was likely going to be an entertaining train wreck. Well, she’s right, for those of us who have seen Rosa wrestle. And when someone who has been on the roster longer than anyone and has yet to win a singles match… just sayin’!

• When Rosa opened the door of her shared hotel room with Nattie and was absolutely naked; Oh Nattie. We know she’s kind of a prude. It was so funny seeing her shock at Rosa’s openness to show off a body she worked hard and paid good money for. To be honest, if I had any Diva’s body, I’d run around naked all the time too.

• When Daniel Bryan offered to donate the sperm to Nikki’s frozen eggs; I cringed a little, I’ll admit it. But why not just keep it all in the family? Identical twins having kids by the same man… sharing is caring, and DB’s joke amused me, as well as everyone else at the table.

• When Brie accidentally got a look at the inside of Nikki’s promised land and actually stared before turning away; And then to top it off, Nikki couldn’t understand why Brie was so creeped out since she has the same one. I laughed.

• When Rosa made a comment that she was 34-years old but looked 24; yes, Rosa. And my body looks like Brie Bella‘s.

• When Nattie continued to be overly dramatic, surprising absolutely no one in the process; It’s always all about Nattie and her perfection reputation. She wasn’t happy in the least when Mark asked her to hang out with Rosa because she only cared about how the other people in the locker room would look at her. She even went as far as to compare Rosa to Jeffrey Dahmer. Until Rosa starts kidnapping and killing young men, and eating their body parts, I don’t really think you can put the two in the same sentence…

• When Titus O’Neil decided to look at Eva’s Save the Date pictures; L-O-L. So very random and so very perfect.

That about wraps us up for today. Tune in next week to see what goes down!

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