Tuesday, September 27, 2022

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NXT Redux (August 7th, 2014): The Doctor of Huganomics Makes Eva See Red

What’s up Diva fans and welcome to this week’s NXT Redux. The Doctor of Huganomics herself, Bayley is in action tonight as she hopes to get a win and climb the ladder towards the NXT Women’s Championship. Her opponent this week? Making her NXT debut, it’s #AllRedEverything, Eva Marie. It’s blowing kisses against giving hugs tonight and who will come out on top? Let’s take a look.

TO THE VIDEO!

Out first this week, it’s good old Baylz and her wacky inflatable arm waving tube men are still defying the budget cuts. Hooray for being allowed wind machines! Speaking of props, Eva gets one of her own for her entrance, a nice podium that Eva can pose on and look all sultry. I am not complaining. Yet.

The match starts with Eva getting right in Bayley’s face before being a total scaredy cat and retreating to the ropes. A lock-up then ensues and Eva gets the best of things with a side headlock. Bayley pushes her Total Diva opponent off yet Eva continues to get the best of Bayley as she takes her down with a shoulder tackle. Eva blows a kiss to Bayley yet then gets kissed by one of Bayley’s elbows. Eva’s selling though. Let me find some pins to stick in my eyes.

Bayley throws Eva from out of the corner before mounting her before floating and spinning over her back; she’s going loopy! Eva is rapidly tapping out even though she’s not in a submission and I cannot. What is this girl doing LMAO? The referee gives Eva the benefit of the doubt (WHY?!) and Bayley goes for a roll through pin attempt. Eva somewhat counters and delivers a move which is perhaps the worst and most unconvincing shift in momentum I have ever seen

Eva then goes straight for a submission and whilst I’d normally moan about someone going straight for a basic, bland submission, I’m cool with it this time! Jason Albert tries to big Eva up by saying that her knee is “perfectly placed” yet that is like saying her hand was ‘perfectly placed’ when picking up a bottle of water. There’s no ‘imperfectly placed’ picking up of a water bottle. Nice try Tensai yet I am not buying it one bit! EVa breaks up the submission and hits a suplex before going back to digging her knee into Bayley’s back. Eventually though, Bayley saves me from hitting my head repeatedly off the wall and breaks out of the move! Praise Neysus.

Bayley tries to mount some offense yet Eva delivers a kick to the stomach. Clearly thinking of the sanity of all Diva fans, Bayley shrugs that move off and hits a small package. Although not enough for the win, Bayley soon gets that win as she hits a bottom rope springboard elbow and the Belly-to-Bayley for the win.

Also, check out Bayley and Charlotte have a confrontation from NXT’s Backstage Fallout. Charlotte looks so bloody good. I cannot get over her transformation!

Thoughts: Firstly, the positives. I love Bayley, her new attire is great, her entrance was epic as always and she didn’t lose. Oh, and Eva is mighty DAYUM fine… looking.

Now to the negatives. This match was absolutely god awful. Bayley tried her best to carry it yet there really was no way to make this work. Eva’s selling was terrible, her basic submissions were boring and the way she ‘shifted the momentum’ was honestly pathetic. That is a problem with Bayley too I guess as I don’t know why they came up with that. If Eva had stood up and then full-on slammed backwards onto Bayley, then that would have been effective looking. This honestly looked like they were just taking the piss.

I’m so glad Eva Marie has taken a step back and is wrestling on NXT yet she needs to take another step back firmly into the Performance Center. She has the charisma and flexibility of a tree. When you act like a tree in a school play as a 3 year old, that is what Eva looks like. #AllOakEverything is a more appropriate hashtag.

Sadly, nothing much this week got me excited on NXT, which is rare as it’s the best show on WWE TV. The tension between Bayley and Charlotte was once again spot on in the backstage segment so I’m still very confident in those two pulling off something great. Let’s keep our fingers crossed.

And with that, stay tuned, Jack will be back!

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