Thursday, September 21, 2023

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SmackDown Redux (September 30th, 2011): If You Can’t Beat Her, Make Her Scream

The Divas of Doom have been having a tough time delivering said doom to anyone with the initials K.K., but this week Natalya‘s been given the chance to live up to the hype, facing Kelly Kelly while Beth Phoenix sits in on commentary:

Natalya gets a bit up close and personal with her pre-match taunts, provoking Kelly into slapping her. Meanwhile, on commentary, Beth claims that she knows she can get the job done this Sunday, and that Kelly’s wins so far were only flukes. In the ring, Kelly delivers a few more blows before trying to Irish whip Natalya into the corner, but she resists. Here Natalya’s strength advantage shows itself as she instead pulls Kelly into her arms and charges, driving her into the turnbuckle. Natalya backs up to ready herself for another charging attack, but only gets two boot prints on her chest. Kelly climbs the turnbuckle and hits Natalya with a flying Lou Thesz press, pummeling her with a series of right hands before she is shoved off.

She gets Natalya in a belly-to-back hold, but Natalya runs to the ropes and shakes her off, and on the return slams her to the mat with a vicious clothesline. She props Kelly up, wrenching one arm behind her left leg and locking her hands beneath her chin. Kelly quickly starts to fight out of the submission (Almost too quickly, if you ask me.. Clearly, this match has a strict time limit), but Natalya keeps her hands locked, eventually slamming Kelly head-first to the mat to stop the onslaught.

Natalya brings Kelly to her feet, slapping her and sending her into the ropes. On the return, Kelly blocks Natalya’s attack with one kick and another before she scrambles onto her shoulders, rolling to the mat and holding her in a tight pin. Kelly gets the 3-count and the win.

With yet another blight to her reputation, Beth storms the ring and attacks Kelly, taking her out with the Glam Slam. Not to be outdone (though technically she already has), Natalya locks Kelly’s legs in her own and hangs her upside down, holding her arms back as Beth delivers a message. Mic in hand, the Glamazon holds it close to Kelly’s mouth to capture her sobbing and screaming, saying that that is the sound Kelly will make when she takes the Divas Championship from her this Sunday. Finally, Beth gets to her feet, Natalya releases Kelly, and the both of them stand triumphant over their foe.

Thoughts: Yet another instance of the Divas of Doom being full of talk, but unable to get the job done where it counts: in the win/loss column. Natalya and Kelly’s match was nothing special, just a chance for Kelly to one-up them again and draw the ire of Beth. Clearly, the DoD are stronger and more vicious than Kelly and can string her up for punishment quite easily, but it’s between the bell rings that they just can’t seem to get the job done. Beth has promised (again) to take the title from Kelly this Sunday, so I suppose we’ll see if she will finally make good on her promise, or if the DoD’s achille’s heel, the dreaded roll-up pin, will be their downfall once again.

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