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Impact Write-Up (May 31st, 2012): Brooke Hogan Arrives, But the Knockouts Are Nowhere to be Found

It’s a beautiful day ladies and gentlemen… well, for me at least. Brooke Hogan has made her grand debut on Impact Wrestling, and not only that, but my idol, Saint Dixie Carter is the person who introduced Brooke to the world! And um, that’s really it for the Knockouts this week. Madison Rayne has a brief backstage segment, but the REAL story here tonight came at the very end of the show. We’ll delve more into that thing of beauty later though, because it’s time to get ready for the one and only Mizz Hogan!

First up, we head backstage to see Madison Rayne randomly (yet beautifully) ironing her Queen’s sash. She was apparently asked about Brooke Hogan right before the camera turns on, as she gives her candid thoughts on the situation in that it’s a pretty big deal, much like herself. Madison suddenly becomes more focused on ensuring she looks good for the special someone she’s been fawning over the past few weeks, before ending the Brooke talk by stating she thinks they will get along just fine. Rayne then asks the camera man if everything’s working since “he” might be watching, as this segment comes to a close with us left wondering just who this mystery man for Madison is?

We are taken to a wonderful blue Brooke Hogan graphic, promoting her debut NEXT, before heading to a commercial break. Upon return, the wonderful, beautiful music of the wonderful, beautiful Texan lady, Dixie Carter hits. I now proceed to sing along as the classy saint steps out from the back looking as great as ever. Her glowing smile warms my heart in the way Dolph Ziggler does to Cryssi… okay, maybe not in that way, but I still love her! Dixie takes the microphone and asks how we are all doing tonight, before deeming this a great evening and going over some of TNA’s history.

The crowd applauds Saint Dixie, as they should, as she mentions that she’s proud of every man and woman to ever step in that ring (which I take as a shout out to Lacey Von Erich, one of my other wrestling gods). Dixie credits the workers and the fans for their success, before getting into the Slammiversary pay per view. She announces that at Slammiversary, they will announce the very first TNA Wrestling Hall of Fame inductee which I’m going to assume is Miss Karen! Dixie then transitions to tonight, where she announces that she is here to welcome the one and only, MIZZ HOGAN!

Dixie says that she has a special place in her heart for the Knockouts, much like the crowd does, and in the next ten years, she wants to take them to a whole new level. This will take help, which is why Dixie has magnificently enlisted Brooke Hogan. Without any further ado, my new favorite entrance music hits, as Mizz Hogan steps out from the back! I stand up and applaud while seeing a sign stating “Brooke Hogan = Ratings” that I couldn’t agree more with! Brooke steps out from the back looking great, waving to the crowd and engaging in a hug with Saint Dixie.

Mizz Hogan gets a microphone, as Dixie welcomes her and a “Hogan” chant breaks out! Dixie says that when she called Brooke, her first reaction was instantly accepting the job offer, but the second was that Dixie would have to tell Brooke’s father! Dixie told Hulk, and he was very supportive of the decision. Saint Dixie claims they did this the right way with “girl power” overseeing the Knockouts, and that Brooke excites her when they discuss plans for the women’s division. A tremendous fan screams out “WE LOVE YOU BROOKE”, which I fully agree with, as Mizz Hogan thanks Dixie so much for the opportunity and the fans for having her there. Brooke states that she knows how much the Knockouts mean to Dixie, wanting them to be seen as powerful and talented, and that’s Brooke’s passion as well. Brooke claims that she does have some very big yellow boots to fill, but that she is taking this seriously and the girls are amazing. Brooke says that she will work her butt off for this, thanking the fans and the Knockouts as she engages in a hug with Dixie and the best theme song in the world once again plays. Security helps the two ladies exit the ring, as we officially enter the era of Mizz Hogan!

Skip to 12:36

Christopher Daniels and Kaz state that the fans still don’t believe them about AJ Styles and Dixie Carter engaging in an affair! But that’s going to change, as they have PROOF now that can’t be denied. Daniels orders it to be played, as an audio clip begins with Dixie and AJ saying hello to one another and making plans to meet up this weekend! Dixie asks AJ to do her a favor and not let “him” know that he’s coming into town. AJ says that there is no way he will find out about this, but then asks how long Dixie thinks it’ll be before SERG gets there! (For those who don’t know, Serg is Dixie’s husband.) Dixie says she will text AJ when he’s on the road, but SUDDENLY we are interrupted by a raging Dixie Carter who steals Taz’s headset from him and screams for this to be turned off! She orders Tenay to punch the damn button and for David to (bleep)ing stop it! Oh, my GOD. Impact Wrestling comes to a close as I am left needing more of this ongoing drama.

Thoughts: Alright, I’m going to separate the thoughts portion of this into a “positive” and “negative” section, starting off with what I liked. I loved Brooke’s debut, but that’s because I’m a fan of hers and a huge fan of Dixie. I’m excited for what she’s going to do for the Knockouts, and just because the first week didn’t feature anything noteworthy, that doesn’t mean it’s indicative of how her entire run will go. It could very well suck, but at least give it time to see what happens. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and I at least gathered this was just used to introduce Brooke to us before getting into things more next week. Everyone seems to want Brooke to fail just because of who she is or how she got there without giving her much of a shot, so more power to her and I hope she proves everybody wrong like Karen did. Also want to mention the beautiful segment to close the show with Saint Dixie screaming at the top of her lungs and dropping F-bombs! I am still in awe of how glorious it was and will probably re-watch it over and over.

Now the negative… where the heck were the Knockouts? Did TNA really fly nearly every Knockout in to watch the show from the back? Frankly, they could’ve cut that ridiculously long and awkward Gut Check segment because, not to sound mean or anything, the people signed from it will probably just sit around and do nothing like Tony Nese unfortunately did. There’s already enough people who are hardly featured, and that took up a lot of time that could’ve been used elsewhere. I feel bad for Mickie James especially, who even tweeted her fans that she would be on the show after not being on for what? A month? All because she was flying out, only to realize the day of that she’d just be sitting backstage. Honestly, there was no excuse why they couldn’t be featured in a segment or match, and I don’t really count Xplosion, sorry.

All in all though, I did enjoy the live Impact and Saint Dixie even trended worldwide from all its glory!

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