HOLY LUCHA! How amazing was Ultima Lucha? As much as WWE’s Divas Revolution is hot right now, Lucha Underground is the modern day trailblazer for a revolution in women’s wrestling on a televised sports entertainment product. Last night’s season finale certainly did not disappoint, with appearances from Black Lotus, Catrina, Ivelisse, Melissa Santos, Sexy Star and, of course, the debuting MELINA PEREZ! That’s right, the Princess of Paparazzi is back, and all of the headlines are once again about her.
In short, Black Lotus killed someone and Melina slayed everyone. A truly captivating two-hour epic broadcast. Let’s get into the action.
Our first notable female sighting comes towards the end of the opening match of Ultima Lucha Week 2, a match that saw bitter rivals Johnny Mundo and Alberto El Patron square off. I don’t know what it is about Alberto, yet I absolutely love him as a face and strongly dislike him as a heel. His recent work has massively impressed me and I normally root for heels!
Alberto had already applied his patented cross-armbreaker to Mundo, yet managed to apply it a second time, draping over the top rope in this instance. Out of nowhere, Johnny’s on-off lady friend, Melina Perez rushes from the backstage area and into the infamous temple. The former two-time WWE Divas and three-time WWE Women’s Champion grabbed Alberto’s AAA Mega Championship from the ringside area, and she clobbers him right in the face with the title! She then picks Alberto up, throws him back in the ring and into the path of The End of the World, Johnny’s finishing move. Mundo steals a win, and it was all down to Ms Perez!
The crowd are split (get it?) as the former MNM members make-out in the ring. Alberto is enraged having lost the match, and he breaks up the love-dovey scenario. He throws Mundo the outside as Melina screams like only she can from the apron. Alberto sends Johnny through the glass panel on a door, splitting him open big time. Melina charges at El Patron, delivering a major bitch slap. Alberto responds with some slaps of his own, several straight to Melina’s tush – she just got spanked! Alberto celebrates with his AAA Title as Melina spits venom at him whilst attending to Johnny’s crimson mask.
That one is most definitely far from over. Melina is back on my TV and I couldn’t be happier! Aztec Gods, I salute you.
The next Luchadora whose story continues is Black Lotus, the woman who has endured around about 347,528 twists and turns throughout this season. She has had a season long storyline despite not actually wrestling a match.
Her trainer El Dragon Azteca arrives in her cell room to help her escape, yet Dario Cueto shows up, telling El Dragon that he is going nowhere. Last week, Dario broke the news to Lotus that his brother Matanza was in fact not the man who slayed her parents years ago like she had thought, it as in fact El Dragon Azteca, the man that saved her from being killed by Matanza when she returned to the temple for revenge. And so are the Days of Our Lives…
Black Lotus chose which side of the story she believed this week, and she is seen murdering El Dragon on the spot. Oh my god. Dario frees Lotus, and she tells him that she won’t be going anywhere with him. She got the retribution she wanted, and that’s that. Dario says that her actions will have major repercussions from Mexico, and that he is the only man who can save her. He says that they need to leave and start a new elsewhere… and Matanza is coming with them. Dario unlocks the monster’s cage, was this a trap all along?
CLIFFHANGER! Until later in the episode. Phew!
We’re back in the ring for our next segment, the only match of this week’s portion of Ultima Lucha to feature a female in action. Sexy Star is participating in a seven-way match for the Gift of the Gods Championship, a belt that acts like WWE’s Money in the Bank mixed with TNA’s Ultimate X ‘Option C’. Whoever is in possession of the belt can cash it in for a shot at the Lucha Underground Title one week later. If they don’t cash it in quick enough though, they could be forced to defend their prize!
Entrances are cut (due to most of the roster being in the actual match) as Sexy faces off with Aerostar, Bengala, Big Ryck, Fenix, Jack Evans and King Cuerno.
Sexy goes after Bengala to start off the match, knocking him into the corner with a dropkick. Big Ryck then tosses her out of the ring though. Her and Ryck definitely have some beef as it isn’t the first time they’ve crossed paths. Ryck teases diving to the outside, yet all of the combatants charge back in the ring and beat on Ryck. Sexy hits a leg drop on Ryck, yet it isn’t long before he’s dumped her out again.
Later, Sexy stomps at Bengala before traversing to the top rope. She dives onto the “Endangered Species” but gets kicked in the bits! Oh dear. Ryck then picks her up and gorilla presses her onto Jack Evans outside the ring.
After some more male-orientated action, Sexy looks set to jump over the top rope to the floor. However, she turns around into Marty ‘The Moth’ Martinez, she creepy, psychotic super-fan turned wrestler who Sexy made tap to win the medallion that qualified her for this match. Sexy hits her submission on Marty again and then he creeps out Melissa Santos by getting way too far up into her grill. She pulls off a hilarious expression and will most likely want a shower after that scenario.
Sexy recovers from her ordeal with the unhinged Martinez, and nails a diving crossbody onto Fenix, Aerostar and Evans, just after Aerostar had hit an incredible 20-foot dive! She then hits a rough diving hurricanrana on Big Ryck after being roughed up by him. King Cuerno crosses paths with her shortly after and he obliterates her with the Thrill of the Hunt.
Just when I had counted Sexy out, she returns a few minutes later, breaking up a pinfall attempt. She then goes for her very own unique pin on Aerostar yet Ryck breaks it up. The one-eyed ogre then utterly destroys Sexy with a Ryck Bottom, his variation on the Saito Suplex. Sexy doesn’t get back up again, and Fenix wins the match following a devastating Fire Driver (sit-out Tombstone) on Jack Evans.
Up next, Catrina is all leathered up as she accompanied Mil Muertes for his Lucha Underground Championship match against Prince Puma. Mil hit a sick top-rope Flatliner to win the title, and Catrina showcased a chilling Lick of Death to the first-ever LU Champ. Catrina, Mil and the Disciples of Death end the broadcast by posing with the Stone of Death and all of Lucha Underground’s titles. The Era of Death has begun!
Finally, most of Lucha Underground’s main characters are seen leaving the temple, with storylines and partnerships teased for next season. Black Lotus and Dario Cueto are seen grabbing all of the cash from his office before driving away to ensure that any brewed trouble doesn’t find them… yet. Maybe Dario wasn’t playing Lotus after all, as the two of them drive away together, along with Matanza in a box on the back. He pokes his masked face out from the side of the truck, and his identity has (kind of) been finally revealed. Lotus & The Cuetos has quite the ring to it. Maybe they should start a band?
Ivelisse’s future is also teased. We see that her tag partner Angelico has a motorbike of his own now and Son of Havok promises to win back the Trios Tag Team Titles. Havok and Ivelisse’s “Will they, won’t they?” relationship is also teased as continuing as the pair ride off on a Harley together.
Sexy Star’s season one send-off isn’t as jubilant though. She is seen tied up from head to toe in rope, as a maniacal Marty Martinez laughs at her under a swinging light. Very Joker-esque. Sexy screams in anger as Marty teases that he can’t wait for Sexy to meet his sister! The suggestion that a new Luchadora will be debuted come Season Two is a fantastic way for the current series to draw to a close. A fantastically edited shot of Dario leaving the temple as the lights are turned off plays and the TV show that become a highlight of my life has come to an end for now.
Thoughts: I just want to take this time to congratulate the entire team behind Lucha Underground for creating by far the most intriguing and refreshing wrestling product that I have ever seen. The over-the-top and gripping storylines, high-end camera work and editing plus the incredible in-ring action have combined together to create an utterly superb season of television.
The debut of Melina was a euphoric highlight of the night for me. Melina has always been one of my favourites, and I have longed for her to make a televised return to wrestling. Now that she is back, it is like she has never been away. She is a deliciously heelish ball of charisma and I cannot wait to see her mix it up in Season Two. She has already been shown as fearless, gritty, spirited and fearless in only a few minutes of TV time and I can’t wait to see her status as a game-changer continue to evolve. She has debuted a major player and I can’t wait to see how her game unfolds when LU returns. The trash-talking, camera-loving, leg-splitting, gold-winning, primal-screaming, California-dreaming bitch is back!
Black Lotus’ storyline also ended in an incredibly surprising fashion. This is a woman who I believe has had one of the best ever debut storylines ever created in wrestling. Despite not actually wrestling, she has had a one-of-a-kind story this season, one that has even involved other characters who never wrestled, whom she subsequently murdered! Her type of storyline is simply unheard of in wrestling, and it has been a pleasure to watch the soap-opera like twists and turns unfold. She has had such an impact that now her actions have caused for the setting of Season Two to seemingly change completely. Whoever wrote this storyline should get a major pay rise as Black Lotus has had one of the most fascinating backstories that I have ever witnessed in wrestling. I absolutely cannot wait to see how her allegiance with The Cuetos steps up next season.
The hint at the second ever woman versus woman match in Lucha Underground between Sexy Star and Marty Martinez’s sister is also a fantastic development and a juicy cliffhanger. Hard to believe that there has been only a sole one-on-one match between two women this season yet it just shows how the company treat their women. They are just as powerful and important as the men, whether in the ring or in managerial positions that influence the storylines greatly.
Who do I think will debut as Marty’s sister? It honestly could be anyone, yet what if it is Melissa Anderson? She had a dark match at one of the Lucha Underground tapings so the bookers must be interested in bringing her in. She has dark eyes and hair like Marty, so she could certainly make a believable sister for him. If she is as deranged as him too, then that will be a whole new character for her to take on and miles away from Cheerleader Melissa, Alissa Flash and Raisha Saaed. Now I’m going to be gutted if it isn’t her! Whoever the Lucha team choose, I’m sure I won’t be disappointed.
All-in-all, Lucha Underground has been a resounding success, and I am really going to miss recapping it for Diva Dirt. I hope that anyone who has read my Analyses has enjoyed them and will drop back by for Season Two. Whilst not yet confirmed, Catrina did tweet me to say that Season Two is on the cards.
— Karlee Leilani Perez (@KarleeLeilani) April 10, 2015
I live in hope! Until that day arrives, I’ll see you for the Raw Redux every Tuesday. Goodbye for now Lucha fans!