Last week on NXT, we were promised that not only would us fans get a chance to vote, but the pros would cast their votes as well. I’m sad to say that I wasn’t home to vote due to a prior engagement, but had I been home, then maybe Titus wouldn’t have left the competition. But nonetheless, the fourth episode of NXT proved to be full of drama, suspense, highs, lows, tears, ect. To date, this has to be the best episode and we finally got a chance to see where the WWE was going to go with this. In addition to the first ever rankings, we got two matches (one awful and one great), and a surprise elimination followed up by a heartfelt speech. Missed NXT? Go watch it. But read this first, of course! Our adorable Kaval was in the great match of the night so before we get into anything else, lets take a look at that.
Joining our sweetness on Team Kaval was Michael McGillicutty and Lucky Cannon. Their opponents were Team Weirdo comprised of Eli Cottonwood, Alex Riley, and Titus O’Neil. No Laycool at ringside! McGillicutty and Cottonwood kick things off with Mr. Perfect’sspawn going for the early advantage. Sweet Eli simply isn’t having that tonight. He attempts to behead the perfect child with a clothesline and McGillicutty ends up flat on his back. Cottonwood looms over his opponent and when he drags him towards the Team Weirdo corner, Titus tags himself in. Cottonwood is none to thrilled about this but he can’t really do anything about it. McGillicutty is able to get away and tags in Lucky.
Titus powers Lucky into the ropes, and Riley shows off good heel instincts by grabbing a handful of the Pretty One’s hair. That’s enough of a distraction to knock Lucky off his game and he gets taken down with a clothesline. The referee never saw it because Cottonwood had him locked in some type of conversation. They were probably trying to figure out which shampoo is better for damaged hair: Herbal Essence Hydralicious or something fruity smelling by Garnier Fructis. O’Neil stomps away on Lucky and the heels decide to isolate the handsome young upstart by keeping him in their corner. Titus makes the tag to Alex Riley, and we get our first look at Miz 2.0.
After reading the comments last week, a few of you expressed your opinions and said that you didn’t enjoy the long recaps and whatnot. The majority of you, however, enjoyed having the whole show spoken about so in the interest of fairness (I’m not a World Cup referee), I’ve decided to try and come to a compromise. Hopefully no one will complain about my writing style this week, and if you do, then oh well. It’s not my problem because at least I tried. Anyway, lets get down to it! Last week, Kaval saw his first in-ring action against standout rookie, Alex Riley. He came up on the short end of the stick, but this week he had a chance at redemption against creep-o, Eli Cottonwood. Were Michelle McCool and Layla able to cheer their man to victory or did John Morrison’s psych ward reject steal the win?
skip ahead to 5:15
Kaval versus Cottonwood begins after a commercial so that means we have to miss Kaval’s entrance. That saddens me because this week Laycool is standing at ringside. They have on matching tops and skinny jeans, with porn star shoes, and of course, yours truly is already jealous. These two are so hot! Speaking of hot, the man who needs no mic skills comes out with Eli Cottonwood and Josh Mathews begins throwing out a million different analogies to describe this match. Kaval tries to start the match off on his terms, striking the much larger man in the legs. Cottonwood just brushes it off and bullies Kaval into the corner. Kaval fights back and gets Eli to back off, and he hits him with a fancy air move. Eli staggers but he doesn’t go down, much to Lay-Kav-Ool’s chagrin, I’m sure. Kaval bounces off the ropes and attempts to slide under the legs of Eli, but the monster freak catches our plucky little Brooklyn boy and carelessly tosses him half-way across the ring into a turnbuckle.
Cottonwood takes over the match and begins to punish Kaval for just getting into the ring against him. Eventually he ends up lifting Kaval up into a huge bear hug. Laycool begin cheering on their man and bless him, Kaval begins to fight back. He strikes Eli in the head a few times and that prompts the big man to slam Kaval into the opposite corner from where they began. Kaval keeps trying but Eli grabs him by the throat. Kaval doesn’t give up and he turns Eli’s offense into an illegal submission armbar or something on the ropes. Now that’s pretty damn cool. Kaval breaks the hold right before the five and stands up on the second rope. Eli lumbers towards him but Kaval kicks him back. Eli presses forward and tries to throw Kaval across the ring again. The crafty Kaval lands on his feet and runs towards the ropes. He springs off the middle one and nails Eli in the mouth with a stunning kick.
I just ripped off a Sue Sylvester quote for my title this week. I’m so sorry.
I don’t know about you guys, but the lack of Knockouts on last week’s Impact left me pretty bitter and disgusted. It was the last show before their pay-per-view extravaganza, Slammiversary, and they did absolutely nothing to build up to Roxxi versus Madison Rayne for the TNA Knockouts Championship. As awful as that was, the worst was yet to come as we witnessed an absolute travesty take place at Slammiversary. Roxxi was unceremoniously fired from TNA with little, to no explanation and we had to watch her once again sacrifice herself for this company that seemingly has no respect for her sacrifices and work ethic. The way TNA has treated Roxxi is despicable, but life goes on and now I suggest that all of us fans move on as well. As we found out tonight, Angelina Love is now back in action and she already has a title shot at TNA’s next PPV, Victory Road. With that in mind, Angelina stepped into the ring against Lacey von Erich, the woman who replaced her in the Beautiful People. The match wasn’t to shabby which is a lot more than I can say for Angelina’s ugly ring gear
skip ahead to 1:40
Mid-way through the first half of Impact, the camera cuts to a backstage shot of a pair of nicely tanned legs. One of the TNA Knockouts is laying down, or laying out, and as the camera pans up the female’s body, the guys who watch are treated to a barely covered backside. On said backside sits one of the TNA Knockouts Tag Team Championship belts and upon further review, the Knockout who is getting a massage is our girl, Lacey. She’s smiling and at peace with her surroundings as the masseur goes to work on her lower back. One of the commentators (Mike Tenay if I remember right) makes a remark that Lacey has an odd way of preparing for her match tonight.
Angelina made her way to the ring later on. We didn’t really get to see the ring entrance thanks to a video package of some TNA action figures that no one is going to buy, but whatever. I’m not exactly bothered. Angelina is already talking and she mentions that because she’s been sitting on the sidelines for the past six weeks thanks to an injury, she now knows how precarious an athlete’s position in life can be. It basically put everything in perspective for her, because Angelina realizes that every match could very well end up being her last because of all the risk factors involved in wrestling; one wrong move can end everything. Angelina says she is not going to waste another second of her career. She calls out Lacey, saying that it’s them two tonight, and come next week, she’s going to get Velvet. Angelina continues on by saying that at Victory Road she will regain her Knockouts Championship against Madison. Angelina tells Lacey to get out there now and the BP’s theme music hits.
Hello and welcome to another fantastic edition of the Diva Dirt WWE NXT recap! I am your host, the one and only… Cryssi! I wish I could say I’m cute and cuddly, but I’d be lying and I don’t really feel the need to do that because lying is wrong. But what I do feel like doing is going on record as saying that Matt Striker has really gorgeous blue eyes. Anyway, last week season two of NXT officially kicked off and all of us were given a small sample as to what we should expect for the remainder of the season. Smackdown mean girls and co-Women’s Champions, Layla and MichelleMcCool, are the mentors of Kaval, and we got to sample that mixed up relationship very briefly. It was enough of a tease to leave the majority of us wanting more and this week we got more. So sit back, relax, and enjoy!
Blue Eyes himself is standing in the ring to greet us as the show gets underway. As usual, we were treated to a video package highlighting the debut episode of season two, and now Striker wants to have all the unanswered questions, answered. He says they’re going to bring everyone out and that’s just dandy. He announces the rookies first and NXT’s resident frat boy, Alex Riley struts out. He doesn’t really impress anyone because he looks like a love child produced by a DJ Gabriel/Mike Mizian one night stand. Following behind Riley is El Freaky, Eli Cottonwood, and then the adorable Husky Harris. Harris certainly gets a better introduction this week since the bland Cody Rhodes isn’t speaking and that makes me happy because I quite fancy Husky. He’s precious. Our boy, Kaval, is fourth and I love that Josh Mathews mentions that the most intriguing pairing is Kaval and Laycool. It really is. Percy Watson comes out and dear Lord. I still have issues with this person but he took a step in the ring direction this week by wearing puple. I can handle purple a lot better than I can handle red and he doesn’t really stick out like Megan Fox’s deformed thumb this week. Michael McGillicutty, the extremely hot and pretty Lucky Cannon, and Titus O’Neil round out the rookies.
The pros are announced next and Mr. Beautiful gets the coveted position of walking out first. As good as JoMo looks in his ring gear, he looks even better in street clothes, and the dapper button down tie-dye looking shirt he is wearing tonight is simply stunning. The man should be a model. He’s just that perfect. Behind Morrison, is none other than Cody Rhodes but really, who cares? It’s Cody Rhodes. The reason we watch NXT, Laycool, is out third and like usual, they look FLAWLESS! Michelle and Layla are both sporting minidresses again this week and they’re of similar style. Michelle’s is more my thing, but Layla is rocking the hell out of hers. Loving it! MVP, the Intercontinental Champion and my fellow Celtics fan Kofi Kingston, and Mark Henry all come out.
It’s the night of Slammiversary and all through the world, wrestling fans are waiting, shaking in anticipation. It’s the biggest night for TNA, their anniversary. The granddaddy of them all for the little Orlando company that has kept on chugging for the past eight years. When most ragtime, no name, mediocre companies would have folded, TNA has truly stood the test of time. That speaks volume about their resiliency and their efforts to make their company better…
My God. I sound like a TNA supporter.
Let me start over. Tonight was TNA’s version of Summerslam (since it’s not Wrestlemania apparently), Slammiversary. How the company has managed to survive this long is beyond me, but nonetheless, it’s made it this long and they decided to oblige us Knockout fans with an absolutely scorching hot contest for the Knockouts Championship featuring Madison Rayne, the champ, against the babyface challenger, Roxxi. I would love to sit here and act all excited for the match, but I’m really not. TNA did absolutely nothing to build up this match and this past Thursday on Impact the title match wasn’t even mentioned. The lack of hype for this Knockouts title match has left a lot of fans frigid, including yours truly, and put an immense amount of unfair pressure on Madison and Roxxi to perform. Whether or not they can live up to those expectations remained to be seen. Personally, I didn’t have high hopes. Did you?
As it turns out, I was absolutely right to not have high hopes. What happened tonight was an absolute travesty. It was a miscarriage of justice. It was the biggest crime committed since OJ Simpson walked away a free man thanks to Kim Kardashian’s father (… and some other old guys). Roxxi, as far as we know, is now gone from TNA and it’s total bullshit if you want my honest opinion. I’ve never in my life been more disgusted with a single television program in my entire life. I find it completely laughable that Eric Bischoff went on record this week saying the Knockouts division was a staple of the company. It’s not an absolute farce and I’m ready to give up on it. There’s really nothing else I can say. For those of you who spared yourselves from watching, I commend you. Lets just get on with it.
Roxxi is out first and thank God she is in a new outfit tonight. It’s not that pretty and it’s certainly not that flashy, but it’s not a gross brown color. It’s a nice red ensemble etched with a bit of gold. As Roxxi comes to the ring, the feed cuts to a highlight of Roxxi beating Madison a few weeks ago in a non-title match, which is basically how she earned this chance tonight. After that, Madison walks out solo and she’s dressed in this little pink skirt and a black top. It’s interesting to me that she’s alone, and I respect that. It makes me wonder if the Beautiful People will end up getting involved towards the end. The champ gets into the ring and does her usual thing, while Roxxi stands back and watches, focused on her match and highly unimpressed by Madison’s sexy antics. Madison is looking so confident, totally ready for this match and she hands the title over to the referee who sports a nifty bow-tie. Cool.
Shockwaves reverberated throughout the internet wrestling community last week when the WWE made the announcement that Smackdown starlets and the self proclaimed, co-Women’s Champions, Layla and Michelle McCool, would be involved on the next season of it’s rookie competition show, NXT. Instead of getting stuck with a nobody, or getting a chance to work with a second or third generation star, the two vivacious divas were paired off with former indy star, TNA star, and ROH stand-out Low-Ki, known to all of us as Kaval. So much butt hurt was expressed over this pairing by so-called “journalists” and “experts” and yes, I just used the term “butt hurt.” It was incredibly ridiculous and extremely disrespectful to the two women who have worked their asses off to make it in the WWE. Lets face it, the Divas division is horribly managed and the girls aren’t given a fair chance. But the comedic pairing of McCool and Layla is totally gold and they’ve managed to make enough of an impression to get a chance to “mentor” a “rookie.”
I do realize I’m using a lot of quotation marks, but we all know NXT is a scripted show with a predetermined outcome. None of the pros can teach the rookies anything they don’t already know except for how to handle the pressure of the schedule, how to manage their backstage attitudes, ect. That’s why it baffles me that so many people were horrified over this pairing. If anything, they should bow to Kaval for the simple fact that he now gets to hang out with two of the hottest divas on the roster. Heck, I’m jealous and I don’t even go that way! The storyline possibilities for these three are endless. There’s so much the WWE can do with it. I’m excited about NXT! Are you?!
This past week on the Post Raw Show, I unsuccessfully attempted to articulate my hopes and ideas for this Laycool/Kaval angle. I’m certainly not the most eloquent speaker on the Diva Dirt staff but I can certainly write my ideas down! What I want to see from this pairing is total domination by Laycool. Kaval seems like a straight-laced, no nonsense type of personality who likes for his wrestling to do the speaking for him. Laycool is funny, mean, out there, and totally fierce. They need to overwhelm this poor guy and do their best to make him into their minion so to speak. I don’t really like that adjective, but it works and it’s a nicer way of saying they should make Kaval their bitch. Of course I don’t expect him to just conform to their needs. He should absolutely not do anything they want and what could unfold is so many funny, entertaining segments of back and forth, married couple bickering. Someone has to stand up to Laycool one of these days and why not their pro despite the fact Michelle towers over him?
The WWE likes to bill itself as an entertainment show and I hope they can deliver. If they go down the route of Kaval rebelling against Laycool, it could lead to problems between the girls about how they should go about approaching him. They could start bickering, Kaval could be forced into the role of peacekeeper, and this can carry over to Smackdown. I love this and I was so happy when I was asked to recap these NXT shows. My enthusiasm shows, doesn’t it?
Anyway, I guess you guys are waiting on me to get into the good stuff so without further ado, lets find out who Lay-Kav-Ool’s competition will be for this upcoming season.
Today’s Impact Write-Up is brought to you with a heavy heart and a rather somber approach. Last night, my precious kitty, Tygrr, succumbed to the afterlife after a very brave fight. She wasn’t but six weeks, but I was attached, and sadly she’s no longer with me. As sad as I am about her passing, it’s a relief to not have to watch her suffer any longer. This Write-Up is dedicated to my little baby and like the great Freddy Mercury once sang, “The show must go on.”
It did go on last night and in a big way, no pun intended of course. TNA saw the debut of a new Knockout; one who’s hiring was rather controversial in the first place. Rosie Lottalove made her first televised appearance against the number one contender to the Knockouts Championship, Roxxi. I’m pretty sure none of us looked at this match on paper (or computer screen) and expected an instant classic. Personally, I can’t believe someone who brutally injured another Knockout got a job but it is what it is (still my favorite saying). Rosie was the first woman to make her way to the ring and good lord. Words don’t even begin to do her outfit justice so I’m not even going to try. She’s certainly got a sparkling personality. I love the way she was announced too.
Instead of focusing on Rosie’s ring entrance, TNA showed their class by highlighting Rosie’s tryout match against Daffney. You can bet that alone is going to make my “Ugly” section because a lot of rude things are coming to mind right now. Maybe I’ll calm down before I get to the ranting part of this column. Nonetheless, the video package gives Taz the opportunity to put Rosie over by saying Daffney is now on the injured reserved list and that’s why we haven’t seen her in quite some time.
Question: Taz, why haven’t we seen ODB and Hamada in “quite some time”?
It’s just after 4 AM and I’m feeling quite sprightly at the moment. The French Open is on my television. Rafa Nadal is playing. The entire Impact show is up on YouTube so I don’t have to leave the comfort of my livingroom desk and big screen TV in order to recap the Knockout action for each and every one of you. At the time of this introduction, I have yet to watch the match itself but it features Lacey Von Erich. That fact alone makes this an epic in the making and I know that secretly all of you are closet Lacey fans. Without Lacey, you’d have nothing to look forward too or complain about! And speaking of our girl, she her part of the show involved a tag team title defense alongside the devious Velvet Sky. The two Beautiful People were in action against Sarita and Taylor Wilde, who to my knowledge have done nothing to earn a tag title shot, but whatev. At least they’re on television for like the third week in a row so I’m not going to complain.
The Knockout portion of Impact starts with a stupid promo for Halfpint Brawlers which isn’t a surprise if you read spoilers. Something named Puppet is sitting at the commentary table with Taz and Mike Tenay. Apparently he’s the owner of the new midget show and he puts it over before we go to the backstage area. Christy is standing by with Roxxi, who last week defeated Madison Rayne in a non-title match. Roxxi is wearing her ugly brown outfit again, but Christy sports a pair of fit jeans and a white wife beater. Christy talks about Roxxi’s victory over Madison and welcomes her back to TNA with open arms. Roxxi replies that it’s great to be back and that she’s looking forward to her time in TNA. As she’s talking, the video of her injury is being played. I’m totally shutting my eyes because it’s just far to gross to watch again. Roxxi says that the position she’s in now is a familiar one but this time, she’s not going to let her chances slip through her fingers. Roxxi’s pretty pumped and ready to go, and Christy decides to drop a bomb. She mentions to Roxxi that because of her (Roxxi’s) victory last week, Roxxi will be Madison at Slammiversary for the TNA Knockouts Championship. Roxxi gets all excited over the opportunity and basically freaks out. Christy is super giddy herself and Roxxi finally takes the microphone and tells Madison that she will meet her at Slammiversary.
Christy sends it back to the ring area where Sarita and Taylor are waiting for the Beautiful People. Puppet is invited to stick around for commentary (oh joy) and the BPs begin to make their way to the ring. I refuse to talk about their entrance ever again so to take up this writing space I want to say that Rafael Nadal is wearing my favorite color combination at this year’s French Open – lime green and turquoise. True story. Instead of discussing the in-ring action, the announcers and the midget begin to talk about Halfpint Brawlers. Shocking. Velvet and Sarita are looking to kick things off and Sarita catches Velvet around the waist. Velvet reverses whatever Sarita was planning and hiptosses her to the mat. Velvet’s super proud of herself but Sarita’s not down for long. She Shawn Michaels’ up to her feet and when Velvet turns around she shrieks and goes back at Sarita. Sarita brings her down and goes for a quick roll-up, but she only gets a two count. Velvet’s back up in a flash but is brought down with an elbow. Sarita makes the tag to Taylor, then splashes Velvet just to do it. Taylor mounts her first bit of offense by somersaulting on top of Velvet and she goes for the cover. Another two count.
This past Sunday at Sacrifice we sadly watched as Tara’s TNA career came to an end at the hands of TNA Knockouts Champion, Madison Rayne. The young champion finally earned her stripes and hopefully a little respect within the wrestling community with her big win over Tara. This week, on the heels of her biggest TNA victory, Madison competes against TNA familiar face, Roxxi, in a non-title match up. How did they both fare? Well stop wondering and keep reading! Like duh!
Roxxi is out to the ring first and to be honest, I probably wouldn’t have recognized her if I hadn’t read the spoilers. She looks pretty good. Her hair has grown into a cute bob and the highlight job… superb. She’s got a great hairstylist, let me tell you. The only thing about her appearance that bothers me? The weird brown outfit. Not a fan really. TNA explains her mysterious, five-month absence by taking us back to New Year’s Knockouts Eve and the match featuring Roxxi and Hamada. Like a moron, I pause the video to type this little section up and I pause it on the grotesque angle that shows Roxxi foot being broken. It’s a horrible angle and I’ll probably have nightmares when I go to sleep.
But hey, all you Hamada fans should be happy. She got mentioned and we got a three second video!
Yes, I’m cruel tonight. Not sure why I feel so damn feisty. Anyway, I’m getting sidetracked. Roxxi stands in the ring and homegirl looks stacked and fit. I’m loving her appearance and now it’s time for the champion to come to the ring. Madison is alone and that suits me just fine. I really didn’t want to write about the lesbian entrance of the BP for the 3490749327402th time. Madison looks pretty adorable herself and I just appreciate the way she’s carrying herself now. Since winning that title, Madison has started to carry herself with this very appealing little swagger. It suits her, as does championship gold.
Mike Tenay reminds us that Roxxi has had issues with the BP for ages as the bell rings and the match gets underway. The more powerful of the two women, Roxxi, takes control right off the bat. She rolls Madison into several pinning combinations before beginning to work over Madison’s arm and shoulder. Eventually the champ is thrown into one of the corners, flattened against it thanks to a splash, and once she comes tumbling out of it, Roxxi bounces off the ropes and flies at her with a knee. Madison luckily dodges this and Roxxi gets hung up on the ropes. Madison clubs her taller opponent in the back a few times before grabbing her by the hair and slamming her down to the mat. Roxxi’s head bounces off the ground and she’s in obvious pain now. Welcome back, right?
This is a bittersweet day for me and I’m sure a lot of readers will share my sentiments. The Knockouts division is on a decline and last night it lost one of its best performers. We knew it was coming, but that didn’t help dull the sting. Tara put her career on the line against Madison Rayne‘s Knockouts Championship and the champion walked away with the victory. Our last TNA images of Tara will forever be her being escorted from the ring by a security guard but the effect and impression she left on us fans will always be remembered.
The Knockout portion of Sacrifice begins with the Knockouts Tale of the Tape. They have a cute little joke up about how these BP spill gold, not oil. For some reason, I didn’t laugh. Maybe it’s because the oil spill has basically threatened all the businesses in my little town and that indirectly threatens my job, and yeah. Oil spill jokes equal not funny. They also mention that this is Madison’s chance to prove herself and that this could be the last time we ever see Tara. Speaking of, the former Knockouts Champion is the first woman to make her way to the ring. Now in my opinion, she already seemed a little emotional. I don’t know if it’s just me, but she seemed to sense that this was it, basically, and you could tell in her face and in her eyes. She savours her ring entrance and then her music is cut and replaced by that belonging to the Beautiful People.
The lovely trio makes their way to the ring and for once, all three look classy and gorgeous (ignore Velvet’s bra straps showing, plz). Lacey wows me in her maxi dress and I really like Madison’s top. They do their usual shtick must to Tara’s annoyance and once that’s all said and done, Madison decides to send the girls to the back. She wants to go at this alone and Velvet’s unsure. Madison reassures them both that everything is fine and as Lacey and Velvet are trying to leave, Tara attacks Madison from behind and sends her spilling out of the ring. It takes a second for Madison to gather her bearings but she does just in time and bounces up to fight back at Tara. She punches her a few times and then sends her back into the ring. Madison looks fairly confident and takes her time getting back in the ring. Tara greets her, rudely, but Madison is able to get control back and she levels Tara with a vicious kick to the face.
So it’s been awhile since I’ve had to do an Impact Write-Up and to be honest, I’ve enjoyed my little vacation from the asinine side show that has become Total Non-Stop Action. I, for one, am incredibly glad that TNA copped out on this whole Monday Night Wars 2.0 thing because they were getting anally raped and not in some sadistic, kinky way. Once upon a time, the Knockouts flourished on Thursday nights. They ran the company with their perfectly manicured hands balled into tiny iron fists. They set the standard for women’s mainstream wrestling and made the Divas seethe with envy over their greatness. If there truly is a wrestling god (I’m talking to you, JBL!) then this move for TNA back to Thursday nights will light a fire under the collective asses of “management” over there and us Knockout fans will get to see our girls shine like the sun on a perfect, late Spring day. No more clouds in the sky for the Knockouts. Use them wisely, TNA. They are your ratings!
How’s that for an intro?
So this week’s Impact is the first official Thursday show, not to mention the last show before TNA Sacrifice. There was a lot of Knockout action tonight and you know, it actually seems slightly interesting. Tara competed not once, but twice tonight against Taylor Wilde and Sarita. The Beautiful People had a backstage segment and Madison Rayne finally told everyone they needed to let the new girl run with the ball and basically just accept the fact she is champion. Velvet Sky continued to be snarky towards Lacey Von Erich, who showed the first signs of what I feel could be a face turn coming in her future. And Chelsea starred in a fun angle that basically dominated the entire show. I hope you guys are ready for all the HKA… hot Knockout action!
The Beautiful People are backstage with Jeremy Borash and it’s basically Madison’s chance to get people hyped up for Sacrifice. She calls Tara out on her ridiculous behavior and psycho-like obsession for the Knockouts Championship. Madison reminds everyone that she is champion now and that basically it’s her turn to run the Knockouts division. Madison puts over the fact that she’s a fresh face for the division and then Velvet chimes in that all the gold will stay where it belongs come Sunday because she says so. Lacey Von Erich, who’s been spastic this entire time, cuts Velvet off before she can finish, steals Velvet’s line, and basically runs off to pee. Velvet gets seriously irritated but Madison gently reminds her that Lacey is really pretty and the segment fades back to the ring area. Tara versus Taylor Wilde is next.
Taylor Wilde is out to the ring first and she has Sarita with her. They do their horrible ring entrance (what’s up with female tag teams having choreographed entrances now?) and then Tara makes her way out. She’s looking fit and feisty, and we get reminded about all the drama she had last week with Taylor and Sarita. Wilde is attempting to look tough at this point and honestly, her acting makes me laugh. She’s like a little poodle who’s trying to stare down a raging bulldog and it’s not going to end pretty for her, I’m sure. The referee orders Sarita out of the ring and now we have two former Knockouts Champions about to go at it.
Tara turns her back to Wilde, and begins to badger Sarita. That gives the Canadian a chance to catch Tara off guard and she fights the bigger woman down to the mat. The referee pulls Taylor off of Tara, and Tara rolls out of the ring. She attempts to collect herself, but Taylor is perched on the ring apron and comes flying off. Tara is taken to the ground, mounted, and punched repeatedly in the face and head. Taylor is once again pulled off Tara and she’s not really overjoyed by it. Tara rolls into the ring and when Taylor follows after her, Tara attempts to take her down. Taylor ducks and takes Tara down with a knee to the abdomen.
Tara backs up to the ropes and begs Taylor to stop. The blonde is understandably weary at this request and motions at Tara to come at her. Tara is pleading with Taylor, saying that they’re friends and whatnot, and all Taylor can do is glare. She’s not buying it and for some reason, she gets the bright idea to charge at Tara. Tara sends her flying through the ropes and Taylor lands on the entrance ramp. Tara gets out of the ring and slams Taylor’s face off the floor only once before tossing her back inside. She grips the ropes and attempts to somersault onto Taylor, but Taylor moves and Tara lands on her pancake!
Taylor springs into action via the middle rope and launches herself off. Tara catches her with a sloppy kick to the stomach but Taylor sells it anyway because that’s her job. Tara goes for the cover and gets the three count, which is a shady ending to a pretty nice little match but oh well. Tara rips off her own kneebrace and begins to beat down Taylor with it. Taylor acts like she’s getting nailed to the cross. Apparently the pain she’s feeling from this post match attack is excruciating. Sarita finally makes the save and Tara bolts, receiving a nice round of applause and a light chant on her way out.
When it comes to TNA, they always drop the ball when it comes to the live shows so imagine my surprise and shock when they exceeded even my low expectations this week. Announced over the weekend, was a title match where all three titles were on the line; The Beautiful People defending against Tara, Taylor Wilde, and Sarita. It sounds good on paper (sort of…) but it was an actual hot mess on television. The MIA tag team known as Saritaylor were mere stand-ins tonight and TNA’s weird booking once again came into play. If you want to watch the mess unfold, go ahead and click the video. If you don’t, then I don’t blame you. I want to forget Impact was even on television last night.
Even though it was a crappy night for the Knockouts as a whole, it was a decent night for the Beautiful People. Earlier in the show, Madison Rayne, Velvet Sky, and Lacey Von Erich were seen backstage in their lockerroom. All three girls were either sitting or standing at their vanity table and they were messing with their make-up and just generally looking at themselves in the mirror. They were having a conversation about how hard it was to be a champion and Lacey starts talking about how her back is always killing her. She goes on to say that things aren’t so bad during the day but when she wakes up after a good night’s sleep she is basically in a world of hurt. Velvet gives her a look and politely tells her she’s not supposed to wear the title to bed. Lacey is like “I thought we weren’t supposed to take them off” and the other two girls just groan. Madison is a little annoyed that they’re being forced to defend the belts again but Velvet calms her down and states what we all know to be true: the BP are the entire Knockouts division. Velvet goes on to say that no one is a threat to them and this and that, and the segment ends with Lacey triumphantly announcing that they weren’t supposed to take the belts off and that she knew that all along.
Tara and Saritaylor are in the ring as the Beautiful People begin to make their way down the entrance ramp. I’m not going to bore you with the details of their entrance but it’s certainly sparkly this week. Tenay and Taz run down the rules for the match and when the bell rings, Tara decides she’s going to begin the match for her team. She tries to tell this to Sarita and Taylor, and when they don’t seem to get it, she demonstrates by shoving Taylor rather stiffly a few times to get her out of the ring. Taylor is like whatever and does what she’s told and Tara turns her back. Lacey is waiting for her and she’s looking pumped to start this match. The sultry blonde is decked in silver and black, and she’s ready for action. Lacey begins to dance around in the ring much to the chagrin of Tara, and Tara finally kicks her, doubling Von Erich over in pain. She slams Lacey down, rolls over her for a pin, but changes her mind and goes for a front guillotine choke instead. Tara shoots dirty looks over her shoulder at her partners while the referee tries to get her to let up on Lacey. Finally she spits at Taylor and Sarita, which is pretty unsanitary, and she picks Lacey up.
This Impact Write-Up is bittersweet for me. As great of a night as this was for the Knockouts, I think of the repercussions it had. We learned last week that at this particular taping not one, but two Knockouts were ultimately injured and it’s unclear when they will return. One of the stars of tonight’s Impact, Angelina Love, suffered a few injuries thanks to the segment we will get to see. I’m not sure how bad her injuries were or if she will miss any time, so maybe someone in comments can clear it up for me. I want to dedicate this Write-Up to Angelina and our Zombie Hot goddess, Daffney. Get well soon and get back ASAP. TNA needs you both and so do all of the fans!
Now with the sap out of the way, lets get down to business. A lot of us were annoyed last week with the lack of Tara and Angelina in our lives and thankfully, TNA made up for it this week. Angelina and Tara squared off in one amazing post match fight that gave Knockout fans from around the world ample opportunity to get to their feet and cheer their faces off. But prior to that, there was a match featuring brand new Knockouts Champion, Madison Rayne, defending against the two former champions; Tara and Angelina.
Skip ahead to 3:45 unless you want AJ Styles hotness!
Before the match starts, we’re treated to a backstage segment featuring the Beautiful People and to say they’re unhappy about Madison’s title defense would be an understatement. The BP are downright furious that Madison has to step into the ring against two former champions. As Madison rants, she points out that doesn’t even need to be pinned in order to lose her Knockouts Title and Velvet makes a highly disgusted sound. They talk about how it’s total BPD and after a minute, Lacey is like “oooh. Boston Police Department.” An awkward silence ensues for a half second before Lacey starts getting stroked and informed that BPD stands for “Beautiful People Discrimination.” Velvet claims that the minute the Beautiful People get things under control, TNA management literally starts falling over themselves to try and find ways to screw over the group. Lacey declares that no one can screw them and Velvet very gently reminds her that they can’t screw the Beautiful People “over.” Lacey agrees to that as well as Madison stands in the background shaking her head. Velvet’s getting super upset so Madison intervenes and says that as the new Knockouts Champion she is going to take care of both Angelina and Tara tonight. With the way the two of them have been barking over the title as of late, Madison will easily be able to cleanse TNA of not one, but two ugly people tonight.
A video package is played highlighting all the events that have led up to Angelina and Tara feuding and finally it’s time for the match. Angelina is the first woman to make her way to the ring and the crowd gives her a great pop. We’re reminded that she lost her title at Lockdown without getting pinned or submitting, and Tara comes out next. Tara has her mascot in hand and the cameras cut to a view of the ring where the referee is having to restrain Angelina from running down the ramp and attacking Tara before the match even begins! Tara reminds stoney-faced and taunts her rival, while the music of the Beautiful People begins to play. As usual, they make their way to the ring as the solid, cohesive unit they are and I must say, I want Velvet Sky’s shoes added to my closet right freakin’ now. Can someone please find out where she got them? Anyway, they do their usual thing but in a fun twist of events, the referee ejects them which leaves Madison on her own for this match.
Extreme Rules is done and over with, and the mixed reviews continue to pour in. Last night, each and every one of us were able to watch the first ever Extreme Makeover Match which starred the reigning WWE Women’s Champion, Michelle McCool, and the lovely, beautiful Beth Phoenix. These two talented Divas fought within the confines of the match regulations and delivered one of the best diva matches we’ve had in awhile. Michelle’s cohorts and resident SmackDown mean girls, Layla and Vickie Guerrero, would make their presence felt, and as the match reached it’s crescendo we all watched as the Phoenix rose again. When the dust settled and the smoke cleared, Beth Phoenix was crowned the ultimate Queen of the WWE once again and Simply Flawless were sent limping to the back with their heads bowed down in silent defeat.
Before the match begins, the WWE gives us a close up of the make-up table and the so-called weapons that are going to make this match extreme. Michelle McCool and her Simply Flawless stablemates make their way to the ring first. Michelle does this unnecessary dance at the top of the ramp before she begins to saunter down to the ring. It’s not as if we were able to see her walk to the ring because the ‘E decided to get in a sponsor announcement but hey, at least they didn’t go to commercial a la TNA. Michelle and Layla are matching and Vickie is sporting some sexy mom jeans that didn’t have an elastic waist thus making me wonder if they were even mom jeans at all?
As the Vickie insults start to fly thanks to our wonderful broadcast team, the Glamazon’s theme music hits and Beth receives a massive pop as she makes her way onto the stage. As always, the shapely blonde looks gorgeous and her face reads of nothing but absolute confidence as she stalks down to the ring. As tonight’s “Buffet of Beauty” waits to get underway, Beth poses to the crowd while Laycool plus Vickie try to not look that effected. When things settle down, the referee holds the championship up for everyone to see and then calls for the bell. Michelle and Beth circle one another before locking up and jockeying for position. Beth forces Michelle to the ropes and the ex-teacher slips between them temporarily. Beth doesn’t break the hold but Michelle does get the advantage and nails the Glamazon right in the face. Beth staggers back and Michelle follows it up with a kick, an uppercut, and a whip into the turnbuckle. Beth jumps on the ropes, over a charging Michelle, and rolls her up for a quick pin. Michelle is out after the one count, but the match is off to a fantastic start.
For all the crappy booking we’ve been forced to watch on TNA as of late, this past Sunday’s Lockdown was a refreshing treat. The cage match between The Beautiful People and Angelina and Tara signaled the end of some old angles and the beginning of some fresh ones. We were privy to a Tara turn, a brand new Knockouts Champion, and the culmination of the Beautiful People who have now reached their highest peak. The thought of a face Angelina and pyscho Tara feud was salivating to say the least and the announcement of a Knockouts Tag Team Championship match for Impact with the stipulation that Daffney would have a mystery partner led to plenty of afternoon speculation of just who that could be. Impact looked promising and the Knockouts seemed to be floating leisurely up, up, up.
Then Impact aired and what we got was a horribly short, stupidly booked match that made little if any sense. An injured competitor made her return and it went unnoticed because she wasn’t given a ring entrance. Angelina and Tara were left off the show which lead to much shaking of the head. How can you have such a dramatic angle the night before and not have it picked up or even mentioned on the next show? We got to watch Lacey Von Erich wrestle instead of Madison Rayne, who’s Knockouts Championship win wasn’t given the proper respect. Then we had to watch a big, powerful woman go down to an aerosol can of spray and get pinned for her team. There wasn’t really anything good about Impact. There wasn’t anything bad, either. It was all ugly considering everything that could have been done.
As I stated earlier, Daffney and ODB weren’t given entrances. This random ass pairing is pretty ridiculous in my opinion. It’s great that they decided to use someone different, but to pair her with Daffney? These two have nothing in common and to my knowledge, no previous interaction with one another. Maybe TNA were going for the comedy effect by making these two oddballs a team but it simply didn’t work. They were already in the ring as the pre-match glitz came to fruition which made it even more strange because TNA went out of their way to promote this match as something that could potentially be interesting. Whatever, right?
As the Beautiful People come to the ring it’s clear that the new Knockouts Champion isn’t going to be wrestling tonight. Madison is dressed in a little black dress with strappy wedge sandals. Despite all this, the ring announcer says she is going to be in the match anyway, while Lacey is the one at ringside. Madison didn’t even try to hide the can of what we’re going to call hairspray for the sake of this recap. I mean you can just see it and tell she is going to use it and that’s how the match is going to end. After TBP did their thing, Daffney and Lacey are two who decide to start the match off. It takes all of two seconds for Lacey to change her mind about that and she tags out to Velvet Sky before the match even properly begins.
It’s definitely a beautiful world these days when it comes to TNA. Last night on Lockdown, quintessential Beautiful People jobber, Madison Rayne, shocked the wrestling world as we know it and became the new TNA Knockouts Champion. The surprising win came just weeks after the title had changed hands in the controversial Lockbox segment. With the way TNA works these days, nothing should come as a surprise, but putting the title on Madison Rayne definitely made for great television last night in St. Louis. Lets take a look back at Madison’s historic win, as well as the long anticipated heel turn of Tara.
The Knockout portion of Lockdown begins with a video package highlighting the hot mess that has been the intertwining storyline these five women have found themselves in over the past couple of months. A rundown of the rules also takes place and the Beautiful People are the first team out. These three women look absolutely stunning. The best part of pay-per-views is the new ring attire that always debuts, and TBP did not disappoint. Between their amazing fashion and lesbian-like entrance, fashion gurus and pervs alike were satisfied. Not surprisingly, Tara and Angelina were given separate entrances. Tara was out before the Knockouts Champion and she took the time to pose with a guy who was holding a sign that read “Tara’s Future X-Husband.” Amazing. Tara was sporting a St. Louis Cardinals’ baseball cap (gag) and she had her precious baby with her as well. Tara gives a disgusted So Cal Val the spider, tosses the baseball cap to the crowd, and makes her way into the ring where TBP are just chillaxing. Angelina Love is out last and Velvet Sky starts to mock her ex-BFF by running around the ring with her hands behind her back mimicking being handcuffed.
Angelina pays no attention and starts pose, basking in her championship glory. She holds the belt up, showing it off, and finally gets into the ring in her own beautiful person style. She hands the title off to the referee, who shows off all three belts. Angelina and Tara don’t really seem to agree on who will start the match off, but Angelina eventually does and she takes Velvet down with a nice, girly spear. Velvet ends up getting beat on for a few seconds before she escapes, but since she’s not Houdini, she can’t make herself disappear. Angelina easily catches her and connects with an elbow, taking Velvet to the mat. Velvet is clearly flustered and scrambles to her corner while begging the referee for a time out. There’s no time outs in wrestling so Velvet smartly makes the tag and we get out first look at Madison.
Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past few months, it’s plain as day to see that the Knockouts division is slowly going down hill. The girls are being turned into pretty face divas instead of being allowed to get down and dirty, and be the Knockouts we all know they can be. This week’s Impact was another sign that the times are changing with the little Florida based company that desperately wants to compete with the billion-dollar empire that calls Connecticut home. Last week’s lock box disaster included contract winner, Velvet Sky, announcing that she would be facing Angelina Love in a Leather and Lace match. We got that match this week (sort of) and a lot more.
Angelina is the first competitor to make her way to the ring. I’m not seeing much lace on her outfit, but whatever. She’s got the TNA Knockout Championship strapped around her waist so I guess she can do and wear whatever she wants. That’s fair. She looks gorgeous, either way, and right at home with that title. The crowd gives her a nice reaction and it’s cool to see Angelina as champion again even if she won it in a cheap way. Velvet comes out second and she’s got her title and a microphone. She stops at the ramp and announces that tonight’s match is not going to be leather and lace because none of the perverts deserve to see her goodies (nevermind that she was more covered up this week than usual). Angelina rolls her eyes, not surprised, because she knows better than anyone than Velvet is all about shenanigans. Velvet smiles so pretty and says that tonight she is going to face Angelina in a handcuff match and that she was gunna whip that booty. Angelina perks up and gets annoyed, especially when the referee starts to manhandle her. He slaps those cuffs on her pretty tightly and Velvet makes her way to the ring once Angelina is secured.
To Velvet’s surprise, Angelina is the first to mount some offense. She stiffly kicks Velvet as she’s slipping between the ropes. Velvet goes down and begins screeching her head off, while Angelina happily puts the boots to her ex-best friend forever. The referee eventually pulls Angelina off Velvet, which gives the devilish Miss Sky the chance to grab the Knockout Championship and hit Angelina with it. Angelina goes down like a ton of bricks and Velvet takes control. She motions for the microphone and tells everyone that she forgot something. The match is now under “I Quit” rules. Velvet starts to beat on Angelina and show her who the true beautiful person is. Angelina basically has no fight at this point because well she’s handcuffed and got smacked with a gold belt. The beat-down is pretty weak, but props to Velvet for protecting Angelina during it. Velvet continues her offense and in a really cool spot, she starts choking Angelina with her own hair. Once Velvet tires of that she gets up, grabs the microphone, and demands that Angelina say those two magic words. Of course Angelina refuses.
Wow, I don’t even know how to start off this Write-Up. First, I guess, we all got a surprise last night when the 8-Knockout Tag Team match that was announced was mysteriously changed into this hot mess of a match with rules that were more confusing than a episode of Lost. If you want an in-depth explanation of what went down, please go and listen to the Post Raw and Impact Show or just watch this video of Christy explaining what’s going to happen with the Knockouts tonight.
So there you have it. The Beautiful People kick off the live Impact after Christy explains the rules and what’s at stake. Velvet Sky and Madison Rayne are looking adorable with their pink outfits and tag titles, but Lacey is missing in action interestingly enough. Velvet starts off by saying that the Knockouts continue to revolutionize this business and tonight the Beautiful People will own three of the four lock boxes. She claims they’re going to get the spider and squash it like they should have done ages ago. Then she says they’re going to get the open contract so they can dominate whoever they want, and last but not least, they’ll get the TNA Knockout Championship, which is apparently the highest honor for women in wrestling today. Madison takes her turn speaking next. She agrees with “Vel Vel” and says tonight the Beautiful People will get it all; everything they deserve and everything they are owed. While she’s talking, Lacey von Erich walks out of the bathroom wearing nothing but a smile and a fuzzy white towel. She takes front and center and says no one will ever forget the night they saw Lacey von Erich strutting around in her bra and panties.
LVE: “Tonight, everybody wins.”
Oh boy.
With the Knockouts basically spread through out the entire show, it’s awhile before we get another segment, but when we do, it’s Christy Hemme standing with Team Tara. Team Tara is comprised of soon-to-be former champ, Tara, Angelina Love, ODB, and Hamada.
After a crappy weekend and night for Diva action, fans turned to TNA in hopes that the Knockouts could shine a positive light on the face of womens wrestling. Impact featured a First Blood Match between TNA Knockout Champion, Tara, and her fiercest rival to date, Zombie Hot Daffney. But not only did we get that match, we got a new Knockout debut and a Knockout promo. Lots of lady action so lets get on with it.
The first thing we got to see tonight is the debut of a brand new Knockout and low and behold she is a somewhat familar face if you watched ECW a few years ago. Former ECW diva and Extreme Expose member, Brooke Adams, showed up on Impact in the role of Eric Bischoff’s personal assistant.
skip to 7:37
The segment opened up with Bischoff on the telephone with someone and the old man lover in me enjoyed watching this. I’ve always found Bischoff hot and I still do. But anyway, once Bischoff is done with his phone call, he hangs up and calls for Miss Something or the Other. The ex-diva formerly known as Brooke Adams comes shuffling into his office in a too short business suit, high heels, and *gasp* glasses. Bischoff tells her that there is going to be someone coming into his office later on and it’s up to her to stop that person, no matter what it takes. She agrees but before she can do anything, Jay Lethal walks into the picture, his stupid Macho Man Randy Savage gimmick apparently still going strong, and starts talking in jibberish which I can not decipher not even for the good of this Write-Up. Bischoff doesn’t really seem impressed and Brooke stands there like a pretty prop with no expression on her face. Lethal says something about the Megapowers and I start rolling my eyes and wish I hadn’t bothered with Brooke’s TNA debut.
Anywho, Lethal goes on and on, says something to Brooke, who finally blinks and moves a bit, and finally Bischoff has decided he’s had enough. He tells Lethal to go put together a main event or something, sends him on his way, and then looks up at Brooke. He tells her to go find Beer Money Inc. and of course she obeys, and hurries off. Well that wasn’t exactly “Serena Debut Awesome” now was it?
Over the next few days, in the lead up to this Sunday’s big WrestleMania 26 event, we’ll be taking a look back at some of the memorable moments in WrestleMania history that involved the WWE Divas. Each of the Diva Dirt team have picked a moment that they loved to share with you all. Today, … Read more
Being inducted into the Hall of Fame is one of the most prestigious honors a wrestler can achieve and in this business there is no bigger Hall of Fame than that of the WWE’s. Over the years, many amazing superstars of the sport have enjoyed their night including three of wrestling’s most talented women. The Fabulous Moolah, Sherri Martel, and Mae Young have all enjoyed getting immortalized in the WWE Hall of Fame and this year, Wendi Ritcher will have the same privilege. Ritcher’s accomplishments certainly speak for themselves and every Diva fan will enjoy watching on Saturday as Wendi Ritcher takes her rightful place among wrestling’s elite. Wendi Ritcher isn’t the only one with the credentials to be in the WWE Hall of Fame. We’ve seen many women come and go over the years and quite a few have made enough of an impact to be considered Hall of Fame worthy. This column is going to take a look at who could potentially be the next four women to enter into the WWE Hall of Fame. Three of these should be a given, one is a bit of a long shot. All of them have reasons as to why they could be considered Hall of Fame material.
Joanie “Chyna” Laurer’s chances of getting into the WWE Hall of Fame range slightly higher than unlikely. With Vince McMahon proving he can bury the hatchet with people he’s had problems with in the past, Chyna could very well end up in the Hall of Fame someday. She was one of the biggest Superstars, male or female, of the Attitude Era, and she was the true definition of sexy, smart, and powerful. Chyna was one of the first WWE Divas to grace to pages of Playboy and she was also the first Diva to break down the gender barriers in World Wrestling Entertainment. She debuted for the company in February of 1997 after being pursued by both WCW and WWE. Chyna started off as a mere valet/bodyguard to Hunter Hearst Helmsley and eventually became a part of Degeneration X. When her DX days were over, Chyna emerged as a singles star and became the first woman to ever compete in the Royal Rumble, hold the Intercontinential Championship, and qualify for the King of the Ring tournament. She had memorable and feuds with Chris Jericho, the late Eddie Guererro, and Ivory. During her time in World Wrestling Entertainment, Chyna was embraced by fans, male and female, and looked to as a role model for her ability to never back down from a fight or challenge. She was also a one-time Women’s Champion.
Chyna departed the WWE for personal, real-life reasons, and those reasons are the ones that could stop her from achieving Hall of Fame status. Her post-WWE career has been less than memorable and it’s fair to say it’s sort of been a trainwreck. She’s had numerous substance abuse problems, a failed relationship with another trainwreck, Sean “X-Pac” Waltman, and a sex tape that the majority of us wish we could erase from our memories. It’s a miracle that Joanie Laurer hasn’t become another sad wrestling statistic and so many people hope to see this woman pull herself together. It’s never too late for a person to get their life back on track and for all we know Chyna could be doing just that. What matters to this article is that if any Diva or woman in wrestling deserves Hall of Fame status, it’s Chyna. She opened doors for women in the mainstream wrestling world that had never before been open. If not for Chyna and her determination to work her hardest to become a success, us fans may never have gotten to see Beth Phoenix compete in this year’s Royal Rumble. Chyna’s truly a trailblazer for the sport and it’s interesting to ponder of what could have been had she not left the WWE under such messy circumstances. Who knows how many more accolades we could have added to her Hall of Fame worthy career.
Twenty-four hours after Daffney and Tara wowed us with their impressive match at Destination X, the Knockouts were back in action live on Impact with an 8-Knockout Tag Team match that had a scary Diva feel to it in a sense that they were trying to cram as many Knockouts into one segment as possible. The team of Knockout Champion, Tara, Angelina Love, Sarita, and Taylor Wilde took on Team Beautiful People (Lacey von Erich, Velvet Sky, and Madison Rayne) and Daffney.
The Knockouts had the privilege of being the opening match this week and the Beautiful People were the first ones out. Madison and Velvet had matching outfits on again while Lacey stuck out like a sore thumb as usual. That said, the von Erich spawn looked gorgeous. Madison and Velvet had their tag team titles strapped around their waists and on a personal note, I love seeing these girls with titles. Their tag team partner, from Sybil, Texas, Daffney came out next in the same outfit from Destination X. She’s proudly carrying Tara’s kidnapped pet and the Beautiful, who have high tailed it to the outside of the ring, are freaking out over the gross little critter. Daffney is showing off the tarantula when Tara comes storming down to the ring. She gets inside before Daffney sits the spider cage thing down and threatens to stomp on it. Tara begs her not to do it, and that gives those sneaky Beautiful People a chance to sleek into the ring and start stomping and beating on Tara. For the second week in a row, Daffney and TBP work together and Tara is the victim of a four-on-one beatdown until Saritaylor come running to the ring to make the save in their horrendous, circus freak matching outfits. Angelina isn’t far behind them. Shit hits the proverbial fan and we have an eight woman brawl which has really gotten the crowd going.
After getting snubbed last month, the TNA Knockouts were finally allowed back on pay-per-view in the form of Tara and Daffney, and the match was for the Knockouts Championship. Over the past month or so, we’ve all sat and watched the evolution of Daffney. She’s gone from having a supporting role in matches to starring in her own and it’s been refreshing and rewarding for everyone involved and for everyone who has watched. A lot of people have been waiting for Daffney to finally get her chance at some Knockout gold. Just how successful was Daffney in her quest to rectify the fact she’s the only Knockout on the roster to never hold gold?
The Knockouts match is the first TNA title match of the night and probably the best one, and before the two heated rivals make their way to the ring we’re given the briefest of recaps about their history with one another. Mike Tenay and Taz run down a few things and they speculate that this could be the night of the zombie …hot. (Thanks for the title, TNA!)
Daffney makes her way to the ring first in a nice red outfit and tiny little hat. She has an extremely sexy entrance and once she rolls to the middle of the ring she lets out an ear piercing shriek that gets the fans popping. Tara’s music hits and the fans go crazy for her as well. She looks so pumped and focused for this match and she strides to the ring with a purpose. Once Tara gets into the ring she sits Poison and the title in her corner and goes right for Daffney. The women begin exchanging blows and after going back and forth, Tara finally gets the upperhand by knocking Daffney to the mat and then following it up suplex. Tara rips her T-shirt off, much to the delight of the fans, and hits her trademark standing moonsault. She goes for a quick pin but Daffney kicks out. This match is far from over! Daffney gets to the corner and lures Tara into her clutches. Tara’s face connects with the middle turnbuckle pad and Daffney begins jumping off the ropes and onto Tara’s back, painfully almost compressing the champ’s spine. It just looks terrible to take that abuse and for the opening minutes of the match it’s pretty insane to see. To add insult to injury, Daffney lifts Tara up by the legs and kicks her in the vajayjay. Here’s hoping Tara didn’t want to start a family anytime soon.
To follow the trend of recent weeks, TNA recycled their Knockouts’ storylines and twisted them into a pretzel to make both seem original. Was there progression? Did the it all make sense? Are we actually going to get a title match on pay-per-view this month? All these questions and more will be answered… after the break! Just kidding about the break! This isn’t American Idol and I am not Ryan Seacrest. If you do want answers, then you must continue reading.
The part of Impact worth watching begins with an amazing promo by Angelina Love. Christy asks Angelina how she feels seeing the group she founded walk away with the Knockouts Tag Team Championships. Angelina gets a great look on her face that’s a mix of disgust and annoyance that her ex-best friends are actually champions and she starts to vent about it. Angelina flat out admits that it sucks to see the group with the titles and that it made her mad. She claims she is going to do something about it and issues an open challenge to any member of the Beautiful People to meet her in the ring tonight. She says she doesn’t care which member it is because all of them have been ducking her for weeks and as far as she is concerned, they’re all trying to be like her. Angelina is an original, and she adds that she is going to start cleansing TNA one Beautiful person at a time.
After a promo featuring time wasters and a tag team match, the Beautiful People are seen backstage with their newly won titles discussing their options. They make plans as the show fades to commercial and after one more segment, we finally get our Knockout match of the night. Angelina comes to the ring first and her hair looks absolutely fabulous. Her ring entrance is short lived because as soon as Angelina gets into the ring, the Beautiful People’s theme song hits. Velvet Sky and Madison Rayne are carrying the titles on their shoulders while Lacey von Erich remains the sole possessor of the ugly stick. The three BP members are carrying themselves with a renewed sense of confidence this week and their smiles are so blinding white the Impact Zone doesn’t really need all those harsh lights while they’re around. Velvet has a microphone and she looks down to the ring with a sneer across her lovely face.
Tonight was a historic night for wrestling as round two of the Monday Night Wars kicked off and in grand fashion for both the Divas and Knockouts in my opinion. Both shows featured tag team action but on Impact we got a treat. With Awesome Kong basically done in TNA, the question has remained: “What’s going to happen with the Knockouts Tag Team Championships?” We got our answer and in spectacular fashion. Missing in action Knockouts Taylor Wilde and Sarita returned to television to take on The Beautiful People (Madison Rayne and Velvet Sky) and the team of Angelina Love and Tara in a triple threat tag team match.
Before the match gets underway, we’re told that due to the champions not defending the titles, Hamada and Awesome Kong have been stripped of them. That’s unfortunate for Hamada because she’s an innocent victim in all of this but life goes on and Tenay tells us new champions will be crowned tonight in a triple-threat match. Taylor Wilde and Sarita sort of get an entrance in the fact it’s nearly half over when the camera cuts to the ring area. They’re in terrible matching outfits but the fact they bother to coordinate their outfits give you a sense that they’re a real team. As the inaugural Knockout Tag Champs, it’s been far to long since they’ve actually gotten to perform on a televised show. The audience loves them and they receive a nice reaction as they play to the crowd and pose in the ring. Their posing is short lived because the theme music of the Beautiful People started to play and those three devilish Knockouts walked onto the ramp. They do their usual posing and flirting with each other, before finally getting in the ring and settling down for business. They know what a huge opportunity this is and how winning tonight could solidify this version of the Beautiful People as the real deal. Team number three consists of our Knockouts Champion, Tara, and ex-TBP member Angelina Love. Angelina is basically foaming at the mouth at the chance to get in the ring against her haters and Tara just looks fierce like usual.
Upon entering the ring, Angelina makes a beeline right for her former friends. Velvet and Madison are quick to get the heck out of dodge but a sluggish Lacey von Erich nearly gets caught in the clutches of a furious blonde Canadian. TBP start screeching at Angelina and Tara, causing an annoying distraction, and that allows Saritaylor to quickly go for a roll-up pin on both. The bell rings but before a count can be made, Angelina and Tara both kick-out. Nice explosive start to the match. Thankfully it doesn’t take long for the chaos to get sorted out and each team of ladies take a corner. Taylor and Tara are the two who officially kick us off. Taylor hits a nice kick to bring Tara down to the mat and she immediately goes for a quick cover. Tara kicks out after a one count but that doesn’t stop Taylor’s effort. She uses the ropes for momentum and goes to leap over Tara, but Tara catches her, holds her for a second, then just brutally drops Taylor down to the mat on her chest. In obvious pain, Taylor makes the tag to her partner. Sarita comes in, ducks a clothesline attempt, and delivers a nice modified neckbreaker to Tara, sending the Champ staggering. Sarita goes flying to the ropes to get momentum for a crossbody and Velvet smartly tags herself in. Sarita is unable to go for the pin on Tara and Velvet takes over.
This week on Impact we were treated to a slight change of pace. Instead of more Tara/Daffney build-up we got a video package, backstage fight, and in-ring segment all featuring the Beautiful People and Miss Angelina Love. Ever since Angelina made her return to TNA, the Beautiful People have gone after full force and this week was no different. The backstage beatdown was pretty intense but what happened in the ring was even better. Lets get down to business.
Skip to 4:46
The video package starts to play and it highlights everything that has happened between Angelina and TBP so far. We’ve already seen the highlights of all these incidents so they’re not really worth reviewing. Once the highlight reel is over, we’re told that earlier in the evening, Angelina Love was in a photoshoot that was interrupted by the Beautiful People. The Canadian Knockout starts swinging as soon as Madison Rayne and Lacey Von Erich arrive on the scene. Madison gets knocked back thanks to a stiff looking shot to her face and Lacey suffers the same fate. An official tries to hold Madison back but she shoves him to the ground and goes after Angelina. The two-on-one situation eventually overtakes Angelina and she’s forced into submission. Madison and Lacey beat the hell out of Angelina and throw her into a random steel barricade that is sitting backstage. Lacey grabs Angelina’s arm and pulls her through the railing, trapping her and leaving her as an easy piece of prey for Velvet Sky who finally gets in on this.
When Velvet shows up she has a hot pink belt in her hands. She starts screaming at Angelina like some kind of psycho and then begins whipping her. It’s pretty intense segment. Lacey tries to calm Velvet down and tells her “that’s enough” but Vel Vel’s not having that. She marches behind the barricade, gets right in Lacey’s face, and screams at her that “it’s only enough when I say it’s enough.” A meek Lacey can do nothing but agree with Velvet and Velvet gets in one last good, hard lick. She slams the belt down and declares “now it’s enough” and she stalks off in a fit of rage. Madison and Lacey gulp and stare at each other quickly before leaving the beaten Angelina down on the ground and hurrying off after their teammate.
