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Raw Redux (December 7th, 2009) РA (Relative) Sm̦rg̴sbord of Divas

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With Maryse two weeks into her return, fans have been less than impressed with her all-around performance. Her return was more head-scratching than anything else and her match last week didn’t show her in-ring skills as much as a more refined affinity to sneak out a win. Will she continue on that path this week, or will we see a more ring-focused Maryse?

We start our night seeing that Kelly Kelly has been handed the duty of announcing the night’s first Divas match. I’m not all the surprised that they saddled Kelly with this random job, since the WWE has a tendency to stick Divas in announcing positions when they don’t know what else to do with them. We’ll see if this becomes a regular thing or was just a plot device to bring in Melina post-match.

The match in question is Gail Kim vs. Maryse. I’m psyched to see Gail get some one-on-one action, as she’s usually stuck in tag team matches (aside from the odd Superstars match). Let’s see if she can pull some good things out what’s so far been a lackluster return angle for Maryse:

The match starts off with a requisite show of arrogance by Maryse–she actually shoves Gail by the head twice. Gail seems to keep her annoyance in check until she spears Maryse to the mat, pounding on her until she’s shoved off. Maryse darts to safety at the other side of the ring, but Gail keeps on her, tossing her by the hair and whipping her into the ropes. Maryse hangs on to the ropes, but Gail drags her back to the middle of the ring by a leg, making Maryse hop along. Gail tosses Maryse’s leg aside, spinning her, and then slamming her down with a hard clothesline.

Maryse crawls to the corner, and once she’s to her feet, Gail charges at her, slipping out of the ring and back in under the ropes, out-smarting Maryse and rolling her up into a pin attempt. Maryse kicks out at two and wanders to the next corner, only to be sandwiched into it by a flying Gail. Maryse drops to her butt, and Gail proceeds to drive her knee into her neck, using her standing leverage to apply the pressure. Gail eventually backs off and Maryse gets to her feet, simply slapping Gail in the face in rebuttal.

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FCW (Must) Watch: Gail Kim vs. Mia Mancini

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Gail Kim may have had a disappointing year upon her WWE return but perhaps the standout of her time is this little gem from the television series for WWE’s farm territory, FCW. Gail takes on former SHIMMER standout and current Queen of FCW, Mia Mancini. Watch below: This is a definite step up from Mia’s … Read more

Raw Response: December 7th, 2009

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Tonight’s Raw is hosted by eccentric entrepreneur and the Dallas Maverick’s owner Mark Cuban. Discuss tonight’s show in the comments below! If you have a Twitter account, feel free to tweet us your feedback on the show–we’ll be retweeting the best ones!!

FCW Watch: Mia Mancini vs. Tiffany

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Coming off the heels of two successful title defenses against AJ Lee and Savannah, FCW queen Mia Mancini takes on ECW General Manager Tiffany in a non-title match. Watch below: To be honest, I wasn’t impressed with this match. In fact, I haven’t been very impressed with Mia since her FCW debut. Her new heel … Read more

SmackDown Redux (December 4th, 2009) – Best Divas Action in Years!

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Congratulations are in order for the Divas of SmackDown as I can positively say that this week’s episode was the best Divas action that I’ve seen in quite some time. From the #1 Contenders Match featuring three of the most talented women in the WWE, actual storyline set up afterwards and the return of a Diva — WWE managed to pack a lot into 10 minutes [which is pretty long for a Divas segment on TV] but it all came across as being important. Watch the action below:

On paper, the triple threat match between Beth Phoenix, Mickie James and Natalya seemed full-proof and it was. The work between all three Divas was fantastic, particularly the interaction between the power houses of WWE’s women’s division — Phoenix and Natalya. The way the pair cleared the ring of Mickie James in the early going and then fought among themselves was a great touch. Natalya is probably one of the most talented Divas to ever step foot into the WWE but hasn’t received the same opportunities as Phoenix or James. If we didn’t have spoilers prior, Natalya would be the one I would be rooting for — and to be completely honest, even though I knew the outcome, I still kind of did hope for her to win!

Some beautiful spots in this match including Mickie’s hurricanrana on Natalya, and Natalya’s discus clothesline on Mickie. But perhaps the most impressive is Beth’s effortless Glam Slam on a woman that equals her in stature. A fantastic spot.

The end sees Mickie James dropkick Beth out of the ring and ‘steal’ the victory. I really liked Mickie’s placement in this match, she couldn’t conceivably be considered as physical as Beth or Natalya, so they used her as a scrappy underdog fighting against the larger Divas.

Meanwhile, the real greatness in this match was the work between Beth and Natalya. I’d absolutely love to see a secondary between these two as a result of this week’s show, in addition to Michelle-Mickie. With Beth squashing Divas left, right and center, here she got an opponent that can step toe-to-toe with her and have a knock-down fight with. Perhaps market Natalya as almost an equal to Beth and see which Diva comes out on top.

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Raw Redux (November 30th, 2009) – The Greeks Take Troy (Again)

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Following Maryse‘s turkey-costumed return, fans came to a general consensus that it was pretty disappointing. But with this week came the opportunity to add some legitimacy to this blossoming feud. Would Maryse deliver, or would she–like the turkey she disguised herself as–not even get off the ground?

We begin the night with an entrance by Melina and Gail Kim. The feed cuts to Maryse and Jillian walking backstage, only to be stopped by Josh Matthews, asking Maryse what provoked her to attack Melina last week:

She explained her motives as this: Melina was holding her Divas title (not that Mickie held the title long before Melina and actually won it from Maryse in the first place) and provided a Trojan Horse, which for Melina turned out to be the turkey. I don’t want to go all history nerd and explain the many ways in which that makes no sense, but really.. I know the common usage of the Trojan Horse metaphor is with a “any trick that causes a target to invite a foe into a securely protected bastion or place”, in reference to the tale of the Greeks hiding inside of a giant horse that they left outside the gates of Troy, which when brought inside the gates (as a victory trophy) allowed them to overtake the city at night and win what has been a 10-year siege. But is the WWE ring really considered a securely protected place? Maybe the fact that Melina let the Gobbledy Gooker stand behind her qualifies as that, but that’s stretching it quite a bit. And, correct me if I’m wrong, but wasn’t accepting the Trojan Horse (and ignoring the warnings of others) a sign of vanity? They believed that the Greeks were surrendering and accepted their “victory trophy” without suspicion, and were ambushed and slaughtered for doing so. I doubt Maryse was preyinf on Melina’s vanity with her scheme.

Either way you look at it, Maryse’s metaphor oversold the thing to a ridiculous level. It actually managed to make it look even more stupid, as she (AKA the WWE’s writers) tried to sell it as some mastermind’s trick. However, when the trick involves one party dressing up in a Gobbledy Gooker suit, I think trying to make it look like any sort of “master plan” is more foolish than the idea itself.

But enough of that. Maryse says “gobble gobble” to Josh (which I guess serves as a goodbye), which Jillian sings in repetition, and the two head to the ring. Melina and Gail’s reaction to this says it all, mouthing “wow” to each other a few times. As Maryse and Jillian make their entrance, Michael Cole recaps how Maryse lost the Divas Championship at Night of Champions and–rumor has it–when into a state of depression following her loss. What a crappy excuse.. I mean, is it really that hard to just say she got injured–which she actually did? All that does is perpetuate the stereotype of the “fragile woman”. Though, Maryse’s character is approximately 99% vanity, so such a blow to her ago could probably crush her in such a way. But still, around 5 months on the shelf due to depression? That’s treating pretty lightly what in real life is a big deal–a serious mental illness. But I guess, as we’ve seen several times already this night, analyzing the WWE’s motives is a lost cause.

I really need to stop sidetracking this thing. Let’s get on to the match.

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Raw Response: November 30th, 2009

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Tonight’s Raw is hosted by actor Verne Troyer of Austin Powers fame. Discuss tonight’s show in the comments below! If you have a Twitter account, feel free to tweet us your feedback on the show–we’ll be retweeting the best ones!!

SmackDown Spoilers: December 4th, 2009

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Spoilers for this week’s early SmackDown tapings are in (the brand taped the show early due to a conflict with the Tribute for the Troops taping). Click the ‘+’ to read. Show airs on Friday, December 4th:

SmackDown - December 4th, 2009
Mickie James beat Beth Phoenix and Natayla to become the Number One Contender for the Women’s Championship. It wasn’t specified when she’d get the shot but after the match, since Michelle McCool and Layla were ringside at the announcer’s table, Mickie James attacked them and got double teamed until Maria came out and helped Mickie fend them off. (Source: PWInsider.com)

Thoughts after the cut:

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FCW Watch: Mia Mancini vs. AJ Lee

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Two of FCW’s standout Divas, Mia Mancini and AJ Lee locked horns on the company’s television series over a month ago — footage of which is now online. As well documented, both have previous wrestling experience; Mancini is particularly known for her work in SHIMMER while Lee has worked for WSU. On paper, this match … Read more

SmackDown Redux (Nov. 27, 2009) – The World’s Shortest Interview

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If, like me, you watch SmackDown only for the Divas, let me save you the trouble: Mickie’s not leaving SmackDown. Yeah, that’s all you need to know. Seriously, no need to even watch the show — just read those four words and you’re good to return to your Thanksgiving-induced food coma or Black Friday shopping. … Read more

SmackDown Spoilers: November 27th, 2009

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Spoilers for this week’s SmackDown are in. Click the ‘+’ to read. Show airs on Friday, November 27th:

SmackDown - November 27th, 2009
– Backstage, Mickie James is asked about Michelle McCool’s video last week. James said that no matter how juvenile Layla and McCool get, she’s worked hard to get here and she’s not leaving Smackdown. (Source: PWInsider.com)

Thoughts after the cut:

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What Will It Be for TLC?

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tlc

We may have just put one pay per view behind us but the trail rolls on, because in just three weeks we get WWE’s next pay per view: Tables, Ladders & Chairs. Now before y’all get excited about a Divas stipulation match, may I remind you about the Hell in a Cell pay per view? Like that, it’s likely that only the main events will be contested in those matches.

With three weeks to go, we have two clear feuds on Raw & SmackDown. The Divas Championship race narrowed last night when Maryse made her return and targeted Melina, while there’s been ongoing animosity between Michelle McCool and Mickie James which could lead to a Women’s Title match. Which brand should get the match? Your Raw & SmackDown Redux writers argue for their show:

Raw (Argument by Erin)
Maryse’s return brings a feeling of immediacy to this pay-per-view opportunity. Whatever heat she has built up from her return (even though I doubt returning while wearing a turkey costume builds much heat) will evaporate soon, and the WWE needs to capitalize on this (relatively) fresh feud ASAP. To pass up this opportunity for a big-scale Divas Championship match would be a mistake; They already blew a similar shot with Alicia and Melina by rushing to have the match before Survivor Series. Though Melina and Maryse won’t have enough time for a proper and full build-up, this match could serve as a formal kick-start to their feud. And, to be honest, I’d much rather see this light the fire under the feud than a bloody Gobbledy Gooker attack. Whether or not a Divas Championship match at TLC would result in a Maryse win, I feel that a worthy feud could be built off of it–Maryse could flaunt her quick win in Melina’s face and start a babyface title chase, or Melina could simply frustrate the arrogant Maryse by batting her away in her first title shot. Either way, it could make for an entertaining feud.

The alternative–a Mickie/Michelle match–has been in the works for much longer, but with the high school mentality that feud has had, is it worthy of the “big time” just yet? What kind of feud can be built off of fat jokes and clothes-cutting? I think those two need to build something more legitimate before they have what is destined to be their “blow off” match. Besides, they just had a big PPV match in the form of the Survivor Series tag team match; I mean, it was literally branded “Mickie vs. Michelle”, wasn’t it? Does SmackDown deserve another PPV match so soon? I think if they were to have another PPV match this soon after the “Team Mickie vs. Team Michelle” match, it might put the brakes on the feud altogether (PPV matches signal the end of feuds, quite often), and they need more room to grow before they reach that endpoint and shift to something else. It would be a case of “too much too soon” in my book. I think it’s time that Raw get the spotlight.

For SmackDown follow the cut:

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Raw Redux (November 23rd, 2009) – A Turkey of a Return

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Back in the 1920s, showbiz had a slang term for a failure or flop: they’d call it a turkey*. Fitting, given the failures we witnessed tonight on this Thanksgiving episode of Raw where a certain Diva went so far as to dress in a turkey costume for her big return. So, was it cleverly self-referential or just a bad idea? I think we know the answer to that, but just in case let’s watch the situation unfold and decide for ourselves:

Predictably, the Divas have dressed up for a “Mayflower Melee”, AKA Thanksgiving-themed 6-Diva tag match. The faces–Mickie James, Melina, and Kelly Kelly–are decked out in (*cough* super un-P.C. *cough*) Native American garb, while the heels–Michelle McCool, Layla, and Jillian–are Pilgrims. All look pretty ridiculous, even Kelly, who apparently decided to put on a tan dress and some Nikes and call it a day. But hey, at least she doesn’t look like she’s doing a Kindergarten Thanksgiving play like Michelle & co. I must say, I love how pissed they looked to be dressed in those Pilgrim costumes. At least they’re acknowledging how lame the idea is, unlike so many times in the past.

Before the match starts they are joined by the guest time keeper, the Gobbledy Gooker! …You know, the giant turkey that hatched on live television in what was known as one of the biggest “WTF” moments in WWE history? I guess since they had two Thanksgiving cliches represented, they decided to go for the trifecta. Gooker stands in the corner and awkwardly rings the bell, signaling the start of the match.

Melina and Jillian start out the match, probably praying that they can scrub off some of the bad mojo they’ve had with each other as of late. They start with a tie-up, Melina getting the upper hand by wrenching Jillian’s arm. Jillian gains control, slamming Melina to the mat. Melina reverses an irish-whip into the corner, sending Jillian into the turnbuckle and proceeding to send a shoulder into her stomach. She lays Jillian across the second ropes, prepping her a double-knee attack. Before she can do it, however, Jillian yanks her by her dress, pulling her to the mat. She tosses Melina by the hair and taunts the crowd a bit.

Jillian whips Melina into the ropes but Melina hangs on. Before she can do anything, though, Jillian meets her with an elbow to the face. She whips Melina into the turnbuckle, prepping for her handspring elbow attack. Before she can do any damage, Melina catches her with her legs, choking her and chopping her on the head. Once back on their feet Melina takes down Jillian with a (almost malfunctioned) facebuster. She goes for the pin, but Jillian kicks out.

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Survivor Series 2009 in Review: Melina Leads Team Mickie to Victory

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Last night’s Survivor Series match was billed as Team Mickie vs Team Michelle but it was Divas Champion, Melina that scored the final pinfall and took the win for her team. When originally announced, it seemed odd that the Divas Champ would be playing second fiddle to someone else as team captain, which it makes … Read more

WWE Survivor Series 2009 Predictions

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Mickie James & Michelle McCool lead their teams to war tonight at the 23rd annual Survivor Series. Women’s Champion, Michelle McCool has proven to be quite the thorn in Mickie’s side, reducing the Diva to tears in recent weeks. But when it comes to battling it out in the ring, who will have the last … Read more

WWE Survivor Series: Through the Years

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ssthrough

Survivor Series returns to pay per view tonight for the 23rd time, but before Mickie James and Michelle McCool lead their teams into battle, let’s take a look at past events…

1987
Team Moolah vs Team Sherri

At the very first Survivor Series in 1987, there were only four matches — one of which went to the ladies. Fabulous Moolah lead the team of Rockin’ Robbin, Velvet McIntyre and the Jumping Bomb Angels against the team of Women’s Champion Sensational Sherri, The Glamour Girls, Donna Christanello and Dawn Marie [no, not that one].

Watch a small clip below:

This inaugural women’s elimination match clocked in at 20 minutes…

1995
Team Bertha vs Team Alundra

Some 7 years after the first women’s match, it was a 4-on-4 affair at Survivor Series 1995. Bertha Faye led Aja Kong, Tomoko Watanabe and Lioness Asuka into battle against Alundra Blayze, Kyoko Inoue, Sakie Hasegawa and Chaparita Asari.

More after the cut:

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SmackDown Redux (November 20th, 2009): We’re Not in High School Anymore

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This week’s edition of SmackDown moves away from the juvenile high school pranks of last week and if it’s even possible, regresses to kindergarten, sandbox-esque bullshit. I don’t enjoy seeing any Diva berated and being called ‘Piggy James’, whether it’s ‘acting’ or not. We all know that unlike real scripted television shows, there’s a fine … Read more

What Should Katie Do Next?

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Those of you [read: the two of you] who watched ECW last night will have noticed that WWE’s resident oddball Diva, Katie Lea and brother Paul Burchill were banished from ECW after Burchill lost a ‘Career vs Mask’ match to The Hurricane. So where does that leave WWE’s Twisted Sister and brother Paul? Should they … Read more

Michelle McCool & Mickie James Advertised for Next Week’s Raw

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SmackDown Divas Michelle McCool and Mickie James are being advertised for next week’s three hour episode of Monday Night Raw. The episode, which will likely also see Maryse’s return, is being billed as a tri-branded Thanksgiving special. McCool and James will serve as team captains for the Divas’ traditional Survivor Series elimination match the night … Read more

SmackDown Spoilers: November 20th, 2009

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Spoilers for this week’s SmackDown are in. Click the ‘+’ to read. Show airs on Friday, November 20th:

SmackDown - November 20th, 2009
Mickie James def. Layla. After the match Layla tells Mickie to look at the tron, a video of Michelle McCool dressed like a farmer calling Mickie “Piggy James”. She sings Old McDonald while a picture of a pig with Mickie’s face on it appears. The video ends with another pig with Mickie’s face on it on a Looney Tunes background with “That’s all folks!” written on it. Mickie is shown crying in the ring & walks off. (Source: PWInsider.com)

Thoughts after the cut:

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Raw Redux (November 16th, 2009) – What Championship Match?

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With just two weeks of buildup, we finally have our ~big~ Divas Championship match, pitting champion Melina against challenger Alicia Fox. Will this match live up to fans’ expectations, or will it–like its own build-up–be a mere shell of what it could be? Needless to say us Diva fans are used to disappointment, but we still hope for the best (against our better judgment). Let’s see if this match delivers:

Of course a big one-on-one Divas Title match in Madison Square Garden was too good to be true, because soon after Melina and Alicia’s entrances it is announced (by 30 Rock’s Judah Freedlander) that this will be a Lumberjill match. No, adding Lumberjills (as we’ve learned numerous times over) does not make a title match ~epic, it just sucks the attention away from who it should be on: the challenger and the champion. I understand that this is meant to build up Survivor Series, as the lumberjills are the participants in Sunday’s match, but surely there was a way to have this match and buildup the other match without needlessly combining them? I was actually looking forward to a good, long one-on-one Divas match for once and this move just neutered the match from the get-go.

Alicia starts the match by kicking Melina in the stomach and attempting to toss her out of the ring. Melina, however, gains control and tosses Alicia out to the wolves instead (Somehow I doubt throwing Melina out to the babyface side would’ve accomplished much of anything). Alicia dashes back into the ring before any of the lumberjills can touch her, taunting them when she’s safely back in the ring, and getting rolled up by Melina for her troubles. She kicks out, and attempts a clothesline that Melina matrixes away from. She continues on an offensive drive until Alicia tricks her, allowing her to fall out of the ring to the heel side. Melina takes a beating from the heels and the babyfaces come to her rescue, allowing her to be rolled back into the ring.

Alicia tosses Melina by her hair and goes for the pin (“Not very logical”, says Spock). She attempts to lock Melina into a hold, but Melina drives her into the turnbuckle. When Alicia charges after Melina, she’s met with a flapjack and a series of clotheslines. Alicia irish-whips Melina into the corner and gets two boots to the face, but is still able to counter a charge by Melina into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. She goes for the pin, but only gets a 2-count.

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Natalya Reveals Dream Survivor Series Team

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Ironically, the most notable Diva not involved in this Sunday’s Surivor Series pay per view is the Diva contribution to WWE.com’s new ‘dream Survivor Series teams’ article. Pretty simple: the Superstars and Divas pick the four stars they’d pick to be on their team in a traditional Survivor Series elimination match. Third-gen Diva Natalya unsurprisingly … Read more

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