It’s definitely been a dismal two weeks for new SmackDown Diva, AJ. Two tag team matches, two losses, and two weeks of non-helpful advice from the Queen of Harts herself, Natalya. But with a new week comes new opportunities and our girl finally gets a singles match. Her opponent is none other than second-generation starlet, Tamina. Will AJ’s losing streak continue or will Tamina continue to impress on Friday nights?
AJ’s big singles debut kicks off with her standing backstage with some random announcer dude that is not Matt Striker. He introduces her and when AJ starts to speak, she gets interrupted by Tamina and Rosa Mendes. They have a present for AJ and when she opens it, it’s a block of fake cheese. They call AJ a mousey loser, which is stupid, and AJ tells them that Lay-Cool want their gimmick back.
Oh boy. Rosa and Tamina are not convincing bitchy heel characters and that segment was all kinds of lame. I’m not usually so harsh but that was Kelly Kelly/Drew McIntyre bad. Yikes.
Good evening everyone and welcome to the third or fourth edition of the Southern Belle Smack. It’s been so long between columns that I can’t even remember how few I’ve written but that doesn’t matter. What matters is that, as I’m writing this, I’m currently on pins and needles watching this French Open final between … Read more
This week’s episode of SmackDown brought us a rematch of sorts from last week. The ChickBusters (Kaitlyn and AJ), with Natalya at their side, took on Team Heel featuring Alicia Fox and Tamina. The most notable difference this week is that the heels countered Natalya’s presence by adding the rarely seen Rosa Mendes to ringside (I guess she is heel again). Will Rosa’s presence bring anything to the match? Will AJ and Kaitlyn pull out the victory this week? Will Alicia continue to just be the fiercest Diva ever? Lets stop wasting time and find out.
When SmackDown returns from what I can only assume has been a commercial break, A-Fox’s music is playing in the background and the so-called bad girls of SmackDown are posing in the ring. It’s only a few seconds later that Alicia’s theme fades and Natalya’s begins to blare across the PA system. Dressed in the most gorgeous sequined mini I’ve ever seen on SmackDown, Nattie leads her rookies out onto the stage. Kaitlyn and AJ look ready for battle and they all head to the ring. Much like last week, a backstage video begins playing while this is going on.
Earlier this week, SmackDown Diva Layla made an announcement that she was going to have surgery to repair two injuries; a torn MCL and a torn ACL. That announcement just happened to coincide with the debut of a new Diva at Tuesday’s tapings, former Queen of FCW and third place NXTS3 rookie, AJ. A lot of people have been awaiting the arrival of the spunky life-long pro wrestling fan and it’s unfortunate that her debut has to happen right as Layla goes out from an injury. Whether AJ was brought up to take Layla’s place, I don’t know. But what I do know is that AJ’s debut was a rather dismal one. She teamed up with NXT winner and BFF, Kaitlyn, to take on the team of Alicia Fox and Tamina. Birthday girl, Natalya, was at ringside with the faces. Lets take a look at what went down.
Tonight we begin things with Alicia and Tamina in the ring.
Random Thought: I can only assume that Tamina and her cave-woman attire are heels by default now due to the severe lack of them on the blue brand, but who knows? Maybe Rosa won the coin toss this week and didn’t have to play the heel?
Today’s SmackDown Redux comes to you with a heavy heart and somber mood. The wrestling world lost an absolute icon today as “Macho Man” Randy Savage tragically lost his life in a car accident. If any of you are anything like me, you grew up watching him steal the show night after night. Savage’s talent, charisma, and personality made him the total package when it came to this sport as far as I’m concerned. His matches with Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat, Hulk Hogan, The Ultimate Warrior, and a young, brash Shawn Michaels are instant classics that will live in my heart, the hearts and minds of many others, forever. For me personally, Savage was the last remaining childhood hero that I had. I’ve watched all the others have their lives end far to soon, most notably Owen Hart. I was watching In Your House that night and I’ll never forget what I saw. If we can learn anything from the events of today, and from the past, it’s that life is way to short. It can be taken from you in an instant. You’ve truly got to cherish every moment and live like it could be your last. Rest peacefully, Macho Man.
For the past two weeks we’ve been watching the rise of the most exciting performer to ever grace the WWE. The artist formerly known as Awesome Kong, Kharma, debuted back at Extreme Rules giving Michelle McCool the greatest exit of any Diva. Since then she’s been scaring Divas on both Raw and SmackDown, taking out the likes of Alicia Fox, Maryse, and Eve Torres along the way. This week not only does Kharma add another Diva to her list of casualties, she sets her sites on someone else. Dun dun duuuuuuuun!
This week’s Diva portion of SmackDown kicks off after an unfortunate plug for the main event later in the evening (which I won’t be watching because I’m still boycotting, haha). Layla is in the ring, dressed in street cloths and holding a microphone, and her music is playing. I’m just going to call it her music now because it’s the second week in a row that she’s used it. Anyway, once the music fades, she starts speaking. Layla says that at Extreme Rules her friendship with Michelle McCool came to an end when she finally beat her in a Loser Leaves WWE match. Layla continues on by saying that during the match she ended up hurting her knee, but as painful as the injury is, it was worth it. She’s glad she finally rid the WWE of the poison that is Michelle McCool.
The title ‘What A Difference A Week Makes’ is basically the gist of this entire Redux. Think about what you were doing at this time last week and take a look at how far we have come in just seven days. Last week, Layla and Michelle were brawling inside the ring with one another until Layla (wo)manned up and challenged her former best friend to a match at Extreme Rules. Michelle accepted and added a stipulation that the loser would have to leave the WWE. At this time last week, all of us were still sitting on her hands wondering when the artist formerly known as Awesome Kong would debut in the WWE. I was a proud worshiper of Randygod. Christian had never touched main event championship gold. And as far as we knew it, Osama Bin Laden was still living large somewhere in the Middle East.
And now?
The decorated career of Michelle McCool is nothing more than another chapter in the history books. Layla is/should be the top face on SmackDown. Kharma is running rampant on both brands (as we will see later). I no longer support Randy Orton title reigns because it prematurely ended the first ever, and well deserved reign of Christian.
Oh yeah, that Bin Laden guy is dead, too.
So yeah, what a difference a week makes, right?
SmackDown opens up for the Divas by showing a highlights from the Layla/Michelle Extreme Rules match. The match itself still gives me chills for the sheer emotion it brought to the table. They leave out Kharma’s debut and when the show returns, the Lay-Cool theme song begins to play. I suppose we have to call it Layla’s song now, but anyway, the feisty little spitfire makes her way to the ring. She’s still sporting the word “Flawless” on her gear, which I love, and she plays to the crowd once she enters. After a second, her music fades out and is replaced by the sassy little beat belonging to new SmackDown Diva, Alicia Fox. Foxy sashays her way out to the ring dripping with attitude and beaming with confidence. She enters the ring, plays to the crowd as well, and gets settled for her first match on the blue brand in awhile. Once Fox’s music fades, the referee calls for the bell.
Last night at Extreme Rules, we were all witness to two things: LayCool came to an end signifying the destruction of arguably one of the best Diva tag teams of all time. And two, one Diva’s career came to a premature and sad end as the loser was banished from the WWE as per the stipulation.
Michelle McCool and Layla have both come a long way in their careers. Michelle has gone from being a Diva Search reject to a world class athlete and performer, and her WWE career has been lined with many historical “firsts” and championship gold. Layla has gone from being a Diva Search winner, to a glorified dancer and ECW side-show, to a jobber, to the most improved Diva on the roster, to the last ever Women’s Champion in history. To say LayCool are to be respected is a gross understatement. Love their characters or hate them, the women behind those characters have proven themselves time and time again. For the past year and a half, two years… hell if I know, they have been the centerpieces of an often dismal Divas division and losing one of them is going to hurt. Speaking from a personal standpoint, it truly hurts me as a fan to know going into the match one of them is leaving. We all knew who it might be. Regardless, we went in on the edge of our seats as we watched. It doesn’t matter if you’re Team Lay or Team Cool. Both of them have been defined by each other. Unfortunately, last night it all came to an end. Let’s have a look…
The action kicks off with a shot of a group of Divas standing around in the lockerroom. A silent, rather timid Layla walks in and she looks like she’s about to face a firing squad. The chilly reception she receives is hardly surprising given the fact she’s had a hand in torturing every girl on the roster. Nonetheless, Layla womans up and shyly apologizes for all the wrongdoings she’s had a part in. The Divas aren’t quick to forgive but Kelly Kelly admits that everyone hates Michelle more than they could ever hate Lay. Layla swallows this and Kelly wishes her good luck. Layla leaves the lockerroom and the scene backstage fades.
We cut to the ring and you guessed it, it is match time!
It’s fair to say that it’s been one heck of a week in WWE Diva-land. We’ve seen epic brawls, exciting Diva drafts, and we were given something incredibly exciting to look forward come SmackDown and the weekend. At the Tuesday night taping, the former BFF duo known as Lay-Cool, squared off in a match that would seemingly put all their issues to rest. Michelle McCool and Layla didn’t wrestle, they brawled. And needless to say their match didn’t happen. But the gauntlet was thrown down and the stipulations were added… and come to find out, very badly edited later. Lets take a look!
The ‘Cool’ part of Lay-Cool is the first to make her way to the ring. Michelle is sporting her SmackDown pride shirt and she does her usual playing to the crowd once she enters the ring. The Lay-Cool theme music continues to play as Lay makes her way out. She is dressed in her blue brand shirt as well and she looks a lot more hesitant to get in the ring than Michelle! Perhaps she’s having regrets over beating the tar out of Michelle?
Happy Good Friday and Earth Day! I hope you all celebrated Jesus and everything he did for us if that is your religious belief and I also hope you recycled because it’s important to protect our planet. Welcome to another wonderful edition of the SD Redux and without beating around the bush (because I have nothing witty to say) lets on with the show. This week’s Diva portion of SmackDown kicks off with a replay of the Lay-Cool disaster from the previous week, as well as a new edition of Couple’s Therapy. Lets take a look at how it all played out this week.
Michelle McCool and Layla are both dressed much better this week than last. Layla returns to being sexy in short shorts and a wife beater, and Michelle is also rocking daisy dukes, as well as a slinky silver, off-the-shoulder top. LOVING it! Michelle tells the doctor that this therapy has been working wonders for them because last week on SmackDown, Layla lost yet another match! Michelle gives a sarcastic “yay” and Layla pretty much kills her with a dirty look.
It’s poor form to jack my intro simply to gush about Edge but since this is my Redux and my platform, I’m going to do exactly that. Besides if you want to be technical he has starred in a couple of these Reduxes and he’s had more than his fair share of Diva storylines. Edge is a brilliant performer and someone who I’ve adored ever since I first got into wrestling. He has it all; looks, talent, charisma, and the ability to make you feel what he feels. On Monday night, when he shockingly retired, I felt numb. I felt like I had just lost a little piece of my wrestling heart. I kind of did, if you want to be fair. No heel has ever made me cheer for them louder and I swear it has nothing to do with the fact Edge is gorgeous or that we share the same birthday. Edge is just that talented. And he is going to be sorely missed. I truly hope everyone can recognize the brilliance that Edge brought to the table. Love him or hate him, he got you talking about him. And I respect the hell out of him.
Thank you, Edge.
Okay, now on to tonight’s show! My mascara is fixed. I’m not going to drown in my tears any longer. Last week, Beth Phoenix and Kelly Kelly returned to action with a victory over Michelle McCool and Layla. This week, Kelly steps back inside the ring to try and prove that her victory in the tag team match was no fluke. She takes on Layla, who’s desperate to try and repair her relationship with her former BFF.
Toss in a therapy session and Rosa Mendes auditioning for Telemundo’s hottest telenovela, Los Herederos del Monte, and you have this week’s amazing edition of the SD Redux!
The doctor welcomes both girls to their first session and immediately Michelle questions why they’re there. They’re not Brangelina, Beyonce and Jay-Z, or any other “couple” in the world for that matter. She also wants to know why Layla is holding her hand and promptly jerks it away. A tissue holding Layla tells Michelle that they’re a team, kind of like Burt and Ernie or “Thelmer” and Louise. Michelle rolls her eyes and corrects Layla’s pronunciation of “Thelma” and says it’s great that Layla wants to compare them to puppets and two characters who drove off a cliff together. Layla says they were best friends like she and Michelle used to be. Michelle places emphasis on the “used to be” part and both girls go silent for a moment.
FINALLY… FINALLY! CRYSSI HAS COME BACK TO THE SMACKDOWN REDUX!!!!!! Don’t you just love it?! It’s been a minute since I’ve actually sat down to type one of these up. As you all know I had the privilege of going to SHIMMER two weeks ago and that was followed up by my first ever WrestleMania week experience. It would take me hours and hours to express my thoughts and feelings on everything that happened during those twelve glorious days I was away from home so I’m not going to bother. Instead, I’m going to jump right back into the swing of things and indulge all of you in another amazing Redux. I sure picked a heck of a week to return, mind you. The rarely seen Divas known as Beth Phoenix and Kelly Kelly were in action. Time to put those milk cartons away, kids. They’re no longer MIA. On this hot and steamy Friday night they teamed together to take on ‘Mania losers, Michelle McCool, and lovely Layla.
Lay-Cool kick us off tonight with their ring entrance. They talk amongst themselves as they make their way down the ramp and of course, we are reminded that Michelle was destroyed by Snooki sometime during that infamous ‘Mania match. Michelle is not thrilled with the replay and Booker T makes a comment that tension has been brewing between Lay-Cool since that match. Interesting.
My biggest pet peeve as a wrestling fan is when I read spoilers and the only description the Diva match gets is “it was a typical Diva match.” Well seriously, what in the world does that mean? Is that your polite way of saying the match was crap? An even more polite way of saying that you didn’t even watch it so “a typical Diva match” just sounds good enough to send in? I don’t get wrestling fans. I really don’t. They’re the worst sports fans in the world. They never look outside their specific comfort zone. It’s awful and ridiculous, and before I turn this into a full fledged rant, let me just get back on subject by saying this was NOT a typical Diva match. I don’t know what that means. This match was a chance for Kelly Kelly to showcase how far she’s come and how she’s able to kind of carry matches now. And it was also a chance for Layla, Kelly’s opponent, and Michelle McCool to start building up their characters towards Wrestlemania. The match itself was short and sweet, but the action itself was a lot better than the offerings the past couple of weeks.
Lay-Cool make their way to the ring first. They’re clearly back on the same page and Michelle is back to being a fashion goddess with her amazing grey mini-dress this week. Talk about one flawless looking human being! Layla looks like she always does, in case anyone cares. Unless she’s wearing the wrapping paper ring gear she looks gorgeous. So yes. Anyway, as Lay-Cool make their way to the ring, SmackDown cuts to a commercial break. It returns with Layla in the ring and Michelle sitting at the commentary booth. Josh Matthews and Booker T are hilariously no-selling Michelle, and she doesn’t even care. She takes over the broadcast with Micheal Cole. Brilliant.
It’s been brought to my attention that since the Elimination Chamber, SmackDown doesn’t really have a clear cut storyline for their Divas. Other than the Lay-Cool teased tension, nothing has happened for anyone unless they’re named Layla or Michelle McCool. Other Divas have of course had supporting roles in this storyline and this week, it was NXT season three winner, Kaitlyn, who got a chance to take a backseat to Lay-Cool. Kaitlyn has rarely been seen since winning NXT3 a few months ago so it will be interesting to see how far she’s come, if at all. Lets take a look at how it all plays out this week.
Lay-Cool are out first. Michelle seems to have gotten a new weave and Layla’s outfit doesn’t look like an eyesore this week. Michelle, however, is not at her fashion best and I just can’t get behind the LBD/camel-colored boot combo. We are off and running, right? This is and always will be the Real Wrestling Fan’s guide to SmackDown. Kaitlyn out second with her own theme song and video. The song is horrendous but her new ring gear compliments her curves nicely; still hating on her hair. She gets a thunderous pop being the hometown gal and all, and it’s just nice to see her on SmackDown for a change.
Welcome to yet another edition of the SmackDown Redux. As always it is written by yours truly and proudly sponsored by ClickWrestle dot com. Wait, this isn’t an audio show. It’s been a long week, what can I say? And honestly, speaking of long weeks, it’s a few long weeks since we last got a chance to see Beth Phoenix in action on SmackDown. This week, the Glamazon returned to the Blue Brand, teaming with her former Raw running budding, Rosa Mendes. They took on the team of former co-Diva Champions, Michelle McCool and Layla. How did the match go? Well lets take a look, shall we?
The team of Beth and Rosa make their way to the ring first. Brings back memories of Rosa being Beth’s sidekick doesn’t it? Beth is wearing her awful red Glamasuit (sorry David, but it’s an eyesore) and Rosa is wearing silver-gray and black. They pose for the fans once they’re in the ring and Lay-Cool’s theme music begins to play. Michelle and Layla, both in their eye sore outfits, do their usual shtick on the stage before they go to the ring. A video recapping Rosa’s shock win over Layla last week is shown and the dissension between Lay-Cool is teased despite the fact Michael Cole insisting everything is fine now. We switch back to the ring and Lay-Cool can’t seem to decide who will begin the match. Michelle finally takes the initiative and the bell rings. Beth and Michelle (hurt foot and all) lock up and the Glamazon is quick to get behind Michelle, lock her arms around her waist, and take her down to the mat. Beth hops up and grabs the injured foot much to Michelle’s horror. The ex-schoolteacher starts screaming and pleading, but Beth shows no mercy and slams her fist right into that boot. Michelle screams like she just got stabbed with a rusty butcher knife and while she’s withering around in pain, Beth tags in the Freakin’ Costa Rican, Rosa!
(Sorry for the lateness of this Redux. I don’t make this a habit but last night a migraine hit me and I couldn’t finish it. So yeah, apologies everyone.)
The six-hundredth episode of SmackDown went off without a hitch in my humble opinion and to say the Elimination Chamber was amazing would be an understatement. The momentum kept on rolling with a solid Raw, so with history not on the side of the Divas, this SmackDown can either be a hit, or it can be a total miss. I’m not entirely sure which it’s going to be because I’m writing this intro without having watched the show. So how about you great readers take this journey with me this week?
SmackDown doesn’t really waste any time getting started this week. Before the intros even roll, a video package highlighting last week’s firing of Dolph Ziggler is shown. This is relevant to us Diva fans because number one, Dolph is sexy, and number two, it involves Vickie Guerrero. And Vickie is made of win. Once the package concludes, SmackDown General Manager, Theodore Long, is shown on the screen. He says that due to Vickie’s involvement with Dolph and Dolph’s attack on him (Teddy), Teddy has every right to fire Vickie. But instead of doing that, he is going to give Vickie a chance to fight for her job. Tonight’s main event is going to be a mixed tag team match featuring the team of Vickie and former Intercontinental Champion, Drew McIntyre, taking on the team of Kelly Kelly and the World Heavyweight Champion Edge. If Drew and Vickie lose, then Vickie can kiss her SmackDown career goodbye. Teddy smiles, takes off his glasses, and the SmackDown intro begins to play.
It’s funny how things work out sometimes, isn’t it? You take a throw away pay-per-view like the Elimination Chamber, the show that’s get stuck between the big two, and you put together a rather weak card of five matches that leaves so much to be desired. For Diva fans the show appeared to suck even more because there wasn’t a match announced at all. I can’t speak for everyone, but I didn’t really want to watch the show. All day I debated whether or not to order it and my gut kept telling me to do it; give the show a chance and you won’t be disappointed. The show ended up getting ordered and low and behold it blew the Royal Rumble completely out of the water. Not only did the matches deliver, but the show was full of surprises. New champions were crowned, both Elimination Chambers far exceeded expectations, and the WWE continued their theme of shock/awe returns. That Diva match never happened but if you want my humble opinion (and you know you do), what we got was much, much better.
When an announcer gets in the ring for what seems to be no apparent reason, I, like all Diva fans should, cringe because it usually spells bad things for the girls. Diva dance offs or bikini contests, or something that’s not a match, usually ends up taking place. So when Booker T got in the ring, my reaction was natural. Booker T has a microphone and he says that he wants to introduce somebody and that this somebody is going to be a trainer on the new season of Tough Enough along with himself and “Stone Cold” Steve Austin. He glances in the direction of the stage and a few seconds later some very familiar theme musics begins to play.
Welcome everyone to this glorious edition of the SmackDown Redux dedicated to the A-List’s show 600th episode! Congratulations to the WWE and to all the Divas and Superstars who have appeared on the Blue Brand over the years. SmackDown has proven to itself to be the home for better wrestling, better storyline, and overall, it’s just more consistent on a week-to-week basis. That especially rings true for the Divas, who usually get pushed off the show for special occasions on Raw. SmackDown’s 600th episode provided us with a tag team match that featured Diva’s Champion, Eve, teaming up with the Glamazon, Beth Phoenix, taking on the team of Layla and Maryse. An injured Michelle McCool was at ringside providing commentary.
We kick things off this week with Eve’s terrible theme music blaring throughout the arena. The champ and her partner, Beth, make their way to the stage. They do their trademark poses, play to the crowd, and make their way to the ring. Once inside they pose some more and SmackDown goes to commercial break. When it returns, ex-champ Michelle is at ringside with the trio of announcers that does NOT include Matt Striker anymore (so bitter), and Maryse and Layla are in the ring. Everyone is ready for action.
Last week during Diva Dirt Live, David decided to call me out on the fact that I haven’t written a Southern Belle Smack column in a long time. Well, I’m here to change that… sort of. This is not a SBS feature but it is me doing something other than a Redux! I figured that I would give each and every one of you a special little treat during this fine holiday. Earlier today, the Diva Dirt staff took you down a rose-petal lined stroll on memory lane with a special feature on some of the greatest wrestling couples of all time. Remembering the likes of Savage and Elizabeth, Lita and Edge, and Molly and Spike brought back wonderful memories, but it also got me thinking. For every great wrestling couple from the past, there’s an equally bad couple. Who could ever forget Bertha Faye and Harvey Whippleman, Dawn Marie and Al Wilson, or Vickie Guerrero and Eric Escobar? And thinking about all these couples got me thinking about the point of this feature. With the emergence of Gail Kim and Daniel Bryan as a power couple in the making, and Vickie Guerrero absolutely dominating SmackDown on behalf of her beloved boyfriend, Dolph Ziggler, what other couples in the WWE should be happening right now? It is Valentine’s Day afterall, and cupid’s arrow can land anywhere, so April, David, Eric, Steven, and myself have decided to play matchmaker and help cupid aim in the right direction.
MARYSE AND KING SHEAMUS
Every king needs his very own queen and what better Diva to fit the role of queen than the Sexiest of Sexy of herself, Maryse? Her relationship with Ted DiBiase has clearly run its course thanks to DiBiase’s inability to win matches and a woman like Maryse demands perfection. Or at least someone who has money, power, or a championship belt. She doesn’t seem picky and why be picky? Everyone knows true love comes in the form of presents and Sheamus would no doubt consider himself lucky to have a girl like Maryse on his arm. He would shower her with presents and worship the ground she walks on. Together, they could rule the WWE with an iron fist; the Celtic Warrior and the French-Canadian bombshell. There’s no need to understand the words they speak because no one really can. The only thing that the Superstars and Divas of World Wrestling Entertainment need to understand is that both Maryse and Sheamus will do whatever it takes to make sure no one stands in their way. Of course, this pairing likely won’t last. Expect Maryse to bolt almost the minute the King of Kings, Triple H shows up to extract his revenge on Sheamus. The first time she nearly gets Pedigreed, Maryse is gone, and it’ll be lights out for the terror-filled reign of King Sheamus and Queen Maryse. But don’t expect Ted DiBiase to take her back because…
A not so appropriate title for this week’s SmackDown Redux would be “The Hangover Edition” but that’s incredibly unfair to the newly crowned Diva’s Champion, Eve, and her opponent on this week’s episode of the A-List show, Layla. However, after last week’s epic episode, I truly felt like this week was nothing more than a buzz kill. The match itself was okay, and so was the backstage segment that featured Michelle McCool and Vickie Guerrero(…and Dolph Ziggler). But unfortunately it just failed to live up to the high expectations that last week set.
Of course, I’m getting ahead of myself. This is not the time to talk about my personal opinion. This is merely the introduction so let me get all generic on you people and say…
WITHOUT FURTHER ADO HEREEEEEEE’S SMACKDOWN!
Tonight’s Diva portion of the show kicked off with a segment. Lay-Cool are walking backstage with Layla dressed to wrestle. They’re chatting about the Royal Rumble and Michelle calls Eve a snake. They agree that she didn’t deserve to be in that match at the Rumble and Michelle says that it’s all because it was Lay-Cool’s rematch. They can’t decide how Eve got into the match and Michelle seems a little annoyed that no one ever seems to help them out like that. They agree that Eve’s victory was nothing more than a fluke and Michelle makes the statement that had the referee been doing his job correctly that she would be the new Diva’s Champion. Layla stops them and goes “don’t you mean we?” Michelle just looks at her and goes “yay, whatever Lay.” This insults Layla and rightfully so, but before she can reply, the door to Vickie’s office swings open and out walks the woman herself.
For the first time in the history of my SmackDown Redux, I’m going into the A-List show absolutely cold turkey, unsure of what exactly is going to happen. On Tuesday night I took a serious vow to remain spoiler free this week and to not watch the show until it airs in the U.S. on SyFy. I’m pleased to report that I stuck to my vow and as I write this, the show is getting closer to starting. All I know is that the main event features the team of Kelly Kelly and the World Heavyweight Champion, Edge, taking on the team of Michelle McCool, Layla, and Dolph Ziggler. As cool as mixed tag matches are, this one gets even better because on Raw, VickieGuerrero announced that this match would be for Edge’s championship. Call it his punishment for using the banned spear at the Royal Rumble. I call it freaking epic because this is going to be the best Redux in the history of Reduxes.
I really should not be this excited for a taped wrestling show.
And so the show begins. We kick things off with Booker T in the ring announcing that he is the newest addition to the SmackDown broadcast team. This upsets me because I am a Matt Striker fan. I’ll miss you blue eyes. Anyway, Booker T does his spinaroonie thing in the ring and as that concludes, Vickie Guerrero and Dolph Ziggler make their way to the ring with extreme, massive heat. Vickie is screaming excuse me and they get in the ring with Dolph helping his girlfriend get in like a true gentleman! Vickie says that tonight will be a SmackDown we will never forget. She has set up qualifying matches for the SmackDown elimination chamber and then she begins to talk about tonight’s main event. She calls Dolph the uncrowned world champion and she brings up Kelly. She calls her a tramp and orders her to come to the ring.
Last week, I proudly presented each and every one of you with the good, the bad, and the ugly of SmackDown. This week, we’re not going to be so fancy because not a lot happened. We had the usual continuation and follow-up, which is more than what happens on Raw so no complaints, please. Beth took on the other member of Lay-Cool in a singles match while one reader’s prediction of a Drew/Kelly/Trent love triangle may actually end up coming true. Let’s kick things off this week with the match featuring Beth Phoenix and Layla
SmackDown’s fierce duo make their way to the ring first. Michelle McCool is dressed to thrill in a gorgeous grey mini and boots, while Layla is rocking purple better than anyone I’ve ever seen in my life. So jealous. The girls have their Slammys and confident looks on their faces despite Michelle having lost to Beth on last week’s episode. They play to the crowd and to each other, and Beth’s music starts up. The Glamazon walks to the ring with a smile etched across her lovely face. Upon seeing her opponent, Layla’s look of confidence kind of dissipates. After Beth flips onto the mat, she eyes up Layla, and the match gets underway.
The title itself should explain the theme of tonight’s Redux. This week’s edition of Friday night SmackDown truly was good, bad, and ugly. But before we jump to conclusions, lets take a minute to reflect on the week in wrestling in general. There was a horrific match at TNA Genesis (popular consensus, of course. I, myself, have not watched it). There was an axed Diva’s match from Raw and lets face it, that’s not always a bad thing. Superstars saw the underused and underrated Alicia Fox and Gail Kim square off in a match that many people are saying is one of the most enjoyable matches in awhile (again, I have not seen it). And to cap things off, SmackDown delivered.
And it delivered in a truly ridiculously wonderful way.
To kick us off this week, we’re going to launch right into the good. That’s the whole point of good, bad, and ugly right? Michelle McCool (with Layla at ringside) taking on Beth Phoenix looks damn good on paper. It certainly looked brilliant when I saw the spoilers earlier in the week. The question is, did it deliver?
Lay-Cool, aka the Dynamic Duo, make their way to the ring first. Layla is rocking a hot, blue mini-dress and boots, while Michelle is in her green ring attire that I don’t like very much. They’re still carrying their Slammys and they’re still delicious heels. They play to the crowd as only they can and they get inside the ring to wait for Michelle’s opponent, the one and only Glamazon. Beth walks out in a rather plain Glamasuit but the crowd doesn’t care because they’re in Birmingham. No offense to my fellow Alabamians, but the majority of the state isn’t really up to par fashion wise. I am the exception. Anyway, once Beth is inside the ring and her entrance dies down, the bell rings and the match begins. The two statue-esque blonds circle one another. Beth gains the early advantage when she breaks the lock-up and forces Michelle into the turnbuckle. She drives her shoulder repeatedly into Michelle’s mid-section and follows up with several nice punches to the former school teacher’s skull. Beth finally backs off and Michelle moves from the corner, but she’s still positioned by the ropes. Beth whips her across the ring and takes her down by clubbing her in the chest.
Love is in the air as the first SmackDown of the new year graces our HD television screens and YouTube pages. The on-going saga of Kelly Kelly and Drew McIntyre continued on this week as Drew’s affection for Kelly burned bright. He begged her to support his actions in the ring and promised her that he would stand by her no matter what in a tumultuous attempt to win her love. Kelly, of course, remained hesitant and unsure as once again, Drew displayed how ferocious he is inside the ring in an unfortunate losing effort. If that unsettled Kelly, she didn’t show as she waged war with Lay-Cool member, Michelle McCool, in a glorious match that saw both Divas at their best. The ending for Kelly, well it wasn’t a storybook. Michelle’s partner-in-crime, Layla, teamed up with her bestie to harass Kelly at the end. But oh, surprise surprise. Miss Kelly Kelly had someone luscious come to her rescue.
Backstage Kelly Kelly, who looks strikingly like a real Barbie doll tonight, is stopped by who else but Drew McIntyre. He starts speaking to her in his sexy Scottish accent and as if my name was Kelly, I get goosebumps when her name is spoken. Drew says the he wanted to make sure he caught her before her match so he could wish her good luck. Kelly pulls back and just shakes her head. She doesn’t really believe he means that because with him, she can never tell. Drew reminds her that even though she doesn’t like the man she sees in the ring, wrestling is his whole lively hood. He says that tonight he has a chance to make his dreams come true because he will be competing in a number one contenders match.
That so worked out well for ya, didn’t it Drew?
Drew says that he isn’t looking for Kelly’s trust, he wants to earn that. But what he is asking from her is her support tonight because it’s the same support he plans on giving her. He wishes her good luck and Kelly smiles and thanks him. She walks off and Drew is left standing there like a love sick puppy.
Could he be any prettier? I’m just trying to find the good in this situation. Bear with me.
The match Drew eluded too would take place later on in the night. Ya know, after he lost to PERFECTION!
SmackDown tonight provided us with the perfect ending of the year. Glama-Hart and Lay-Cool put together one last blow off match (I think…) and it was nothing short of spectacular.
Happy New Year!
Backstage at SmackDown, there’s a party going on. Superstars, Divas, general managers, and a leprechaun are milling around as Rosa Mendes comes into focus. She’s hanging out with Hornswoggle for whatever reason. She’s feeding him cheese cubes from a silver platter and makes the comment that two thousand and ten was a pretty good year for her. ‘Swoggle starts making noise, so Rosa corrects herself and says that it has been a good year for “them” and that now, it’s time to celebrate. NXT rookie, Conor O’Brian, appears and stands over Rosa’s shoulder. He eyes her platter of cheese and begins to sniff it. Rosa freaks out a bit and wants to know what he’s doing, all the while turning away from him in disgust. Conor says that he admires Rosa’s cheese and his face starts to twitch. Thankfully for Rosa, the sexy Latin stallion, Alberto del Rio, walks over and demands to know what his rookie is doing. Conor motions towards the cheese and an apologetic Alberto turns to Rosa. He tells her not to mind his rookie and makes a comment about Conor looking like a rat. He then turns to Conor and warns him to leave the lady alone (Rosa smirks), as well as the thing (‘Swoggle enunciates). Alberto and Conor, as well as Ricardo, walk off and Teddy Long stands up on a platform. He welcomes everyone to the party and asks for volunteers to come up and make New Year’s resolutions.
Cue Drew McIntyre who gets up and smiles at Kelly Kelly. He says that all of us can mark it down that in two thousand and eleven, Drew will be a champion. He turns to Kelly and adds that he also wants to be a better person. A smiling Kelly seems to approve of this and unfortunately that probably means that in two thousand and eleven us fans are going to be subjected to more horribly acted segments between these two. Womp womp.
