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In Video: Rare Documentary Featuring Angelina Love, Kristin Astara & Taylor Wilde

A rare short documentary featuring TNA Knockouts, Angelina Love and Taylor Wilde as well as Diva Dirt’s Kristin Astara was brought to our attention today and I thought it’d be cool to post it. ‘Learning the Ropes’ features the three ladies during their time training in Deep South Wrestling back in 2005 when all three … Read more

Trick or Treat! Going Halloween Costume Shopping: Knockouts Edition

For the past two years around Halloween, (view 2008 and part 1, part 2, and part 3 of 2009) we’ve suggested some tongue-in-cheek costumes for Divas and Knockouts. This year, we continue the tradition. We started with the NXT Rookies, and next up are the Knockouts. The Divas will follow later this week, leading up to Halloween. Enjoy, and be sure to vote for your favorite below!

Cookie
Costume: A scientist.
Why?: She hasn’t been around long, but it’s safe to say that Cookie, in emulating “The Jersey Shore”‘s Snooki, won’t be making any medical breakthroughs in the near future. So, to best lampoon her lampooning of the shallow, less-than-genius, party animal, why not dress up as a scientist? Wearing the typical white labcoat and gloves while spouting different stereotypical “smart” phrases (E=MC^2 anyone?) in a New Jersey accent would make it pitch perfect.
Get the look: Go for a mad scientist look or tone it down to look more like the real deal.

Daffney
Costume: The Cheshire Cat from “Alice in Wonderland”.
Why?: Daffney’s definitely got a soft spot for the quirky, and Alice in Wonderland seems to fit in that spot nicely. Hell, she even dressed as a version of the Queen of Hearts in a Halloween-themed photoshoot on TNA’s website. The Cheshire Cat is easily one of the most iconic characters to come out of the iconic work, and if Daffney wants to up her quirky-ness, dressing as a shape-shifting and disappearing cat is certainly a step in that direction. To keep herself from looking like an extra in the stage show “Cats”, Daffney could act in the lazy, dreamy way the purple-and-pink cat’s known for instead of simply hissing and crawling around. Of course, the disappearing act could be a complication, though if any Knockout could pull off something so strange, it’d be Daffney.
Get the look: Put a costume together and watch the animated movie to get the act down pat.

Tara & Madison Rayne
Costume: Pinky and the Brain from the “Animaniacs” cartoon.
Why?: Former friends Angelina Love and Velvet Sky have recently dubbed the duo of Tara and Madison “Pinky and the Brain”. How about turning that insult into a fully realized costume? The fact that Madison was called “evil” in connection to that comparison leads us to believe that she would be Brain, the short, surly, evil rat who plots every single day to take over the world. His sidekick (or rather, cage-mate) Pinky is a taller, dimmer, sillier rat who goes along for the ride and usually screws us Brain’s plans. Tara is known for her silly costumes, and this would fall right in line with them. It’s far too easy to picture Tara putting on the voice and stumbling around like Pinky, isn’t it? Are you thinking what I’m thinking?
Get the look: Find a partner to pair up with, put on some rat ears, don a tail, wear all-over white clothing, and assume the attitude of your chosen rat–Pinky’s loveable but dumb, and Brain’s serious and conniving.

Read on to see more costume suggestions.

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TNA Knockout Announces Engagement

One half of the Knockouts Tag Team Champions, Taylor Wilde announced her engagement via Twitter this morning. Taylor wrote: “I can’t contain my joy and excitment anymore! I’m engaged to @olivermitchell. :)” Congratulations to the happy couple!

Angelina Love & Taylor Wilde Discuss Visa Issues, Favorite TNA Moments

TNA Knockouts Angelina Love and Taylor Wilde joined The Fight Show With Mauro Ranallo, discussing an array of topics including the wrestlers that inspire them, Angelina’s visa issues from last year, the origins of The Beautful People, and the people currently in charge of running the Knockouts division. Highlights include: • Trish Stratus was a … Read more

Impact Write-Up (September 23, 2010): Well, That Certainly Wasn’t PG!

It’s that time again! Time for our weekly dose of TNA Impact! What will those wacky Knockouts be up to on this edition?  Will Tara and the Rayne bring the pain, or will the Beautiful People (now with extra added Lacey Von Erich!) find some way to thwart their dastardly schemes? Perhaps some gold will switch waists? Lets find out!


Skip to 3:27

We see Lacey Von Erich walk into the makeup room where the original Beautiful People – Velvet Sky and Angelina Love – are already there, chatting amongst themselves. Lacey sits down and looks deep in thought (I’m refraining from cracking a joke here) until finally Velvet asks if she’s okay. At that… the youngest Von Erich EXPLODES. It’s a beautiful rant, made more perfect by the F-bombs Lacey throws out there. Brings a prideful tear to my eye. Go ahead, listen to it. I’ll wait – there’s no words that can do it justice.

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Impact Write-Up (September 16, 2010): The Lines are Drawn

Greetings and salutations everyone! With Cryssi taking over the SmackDown Redux, I’ll be taking on writing up Impact. I’m excited about this, but I also hope I can do as good a job as she has done. Let’s get right down to it, shall we?

This week, we have TNA Knockout Tag Team Champions Taylor Wilde and Hamada facing off against Madison Rayne and the newly-returned to TV Lacey von Erich. It would be a major upset if Madison & Lacey were to overcome this formidable team. Can they work together to regain the gold? Or will Hamaylor keep those shiny belts around their waists? Find out below.

Before the match, we go backstage to see Lacey, Madison and Tara in their lockeroom. Lacey is clad in a towel yet again… perhaps it’ll be her new ring attire? Madison gushes about how great it is to see Lacey, and springs the news on her that they have a tag title match “like five minutes ago!” Lacey looks confused and she mentions that she hasn’t made her decision yet. At this, Madison’s temper flares. She screeches about how it wasn’t her that laid her out a few weeks ago and that there is no decision to make. Together, her and Tara bully Lacey into submission, ordering her to get dressed before leaving in a huff. Poor Lacey looks unhappy but there seems to be little she can do but comply.

The Beautiful People’s music hits and out come Tara and Madison on the motorbike, Lacey trailing behind. Without waiting for either of the two, Lacey bounces into the ring, which causes Madison to look slightly irritated. She shrugs it off and whilst Tara climbs into the ring, Madison climbs up onto the apron. Tara nudges Lacey out of the way so she can perch on the bottom rope and lean over, giving Madison’s ass a smack. Which is followed by a quick kiss. Tara goes to give Lacey a kiss as well but the blonde wants a handshake instead. I admit, I laughed! Taylor’s music hits and out come Taylor and Ayako, the latter of which has her belt hung around her neck. After posing on one knee, Hamada takes Taylor’s hand, spins her and gives her a smack on the behind! Cheeky Ayako! The two make their way to the ring and after posing for a moment or two, the match gets underway with Taylor and Lacey starting it off.

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TNA Xplosion Watch (August 13, 2010): Return of the Zombie Hot!

Okay, so technically she never left, but it’s still been awhile since we’ve seen her…so I hereby dub this TNA Xplosion write-up as “Return of the Zombie Hot!” Tonight we see one half of the new TNA Knockout tag champions, Hamada taking on the living dead girl Daffney. Can Hamada moonsault her way to victory? Or will Daffney rise again to feast on some delicious, fresh braaaaaaains? (I’m a horror fan, I’ve got a million Zombie references to throw out. Aren’t you all excited!?) Lets find out!

Part 1

We open with Taylor Wilde and Hamada in the back, holding their tag straps. Taylor expresses how great it is to be a tag team champion again and that it’s even better with her new partner. “If you  haven’t noticed, Sarita has lost her mind,” she comments and I can’t help but laugh, she says it in such a straight forward manner! She knows she can count on Hamada and it feels wonderful to be a two-time tag team champion.

We switch to Daffney, who’s just now learning that Taylor and Hamada are tag champs. She wonders where she was when all this happened and concluded she must’ve been, “out there, in la la realm.” There’s a gleam in Daffney’s eye – the kind of gleam that says, “Doesn’t really matter if they’re champions. I just want to hurt someone.” She’ll get her opportunity tonight!

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Impact Write-Up (August 5th, 2010): The Match That Launched A Thousand Retweets

Tonight the long anticipated return of Hamada to Impact took place and sadly for her, it was in very unspectacular fashion. She teamed up with Taylor Wilde to take on the TNA Knockouts Tag Team Champions, Velvet Sky and Lacey Von Erich, and the match ended up being one of the worst TNA matches of all time. Granted, it was no Jenna/Sharmell fiasco, but it was pretty damn bad. If you don’t wish to take my word for it, I understand. All the proof lies within the video so feel free to see the ugliness for yourself.

The tag match officially kicked off the wrestling portion of the show tonight, so while everyone sat around and digested the epic and highly personal promo stand-off between Raven and Tommy Dreamer, the Beautiful People began to make their way towards the ring. Velvet Sky and Lacey Von Erich were in rare form tonight, carrying their titles with confidence. Each girl looked great as well. Kudos to LVE for becoming the first ever Beautiful People member with actual ring gear! Velvet was dressed in one of her usual outfits, and it’s not worth describing to be honest. The show cut to commercial as the Beautiful People played to the crowd but upon it’s return, Hamada and Taylor Wilde made their way to the ring. Their entrance was cute, and a bit cheeky. Hamada twirled Taylor around and slapped her on the ass, a la the Beautiful People. Shame Taylor Wilde’s ring gear continues to make my stomach turn. The Beautiful People stood on the outside of the ring as Taylor and Hamada hyped up the crowd. Velvet screamed at them and made reference to the fact that her title wasn’t going anywhere. When the BPs returned to the apron, Lacey hopped into the ring to start the match off against Taylor. The referee held the championships up and the match began.

Taylor coaxed Lacey into turning around so that everyone could admire her new, sparkly outfit. Of course, Lacey fell for it and Taylor immediately rolled her up for a pin. Lacey scrambled out of the before the referee could even get down and count and Taylor flew to the ropes to gain some momentum. Velvet backed up Lacey by cheaply distracting Taylor, who promptly turned around to bitch. Lacey hit her from behind and went for a spinning heel kick but Taylor dropped down and swept her off her feet. Taylor once again went to the ropes, but Lacey was there to catch her. Unfortunately what could have been a gorgeous move was hampered by the fact Lacey struggled to throw Taylor over her head. Oh well. Eventually, Lacey did what she wanted to do, and Taylor rolled over to tag in the rarely seen Hamada.

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Impact Write-Up (July 22nd, 2010): Confusion Reigns Supreme But Not On Our Part For A Change

Last week on Impact, the Knockouts took an unexpected, yet welcomed step in the right direction in terms of their booking. Whoever wrote the show or whatever gave all of us long suffering KO fans a well deserved treat in the form of a brilliantly scripted and well acted in-ring segment and a pretty darn good streetfight. Personally, it was almost to much for me to handle you know what I’m sayin’? This week, the action wasn’t overwhelming but it was still great, and very enjoyable to watch.

Tonight’s Knockout portion of Impact kicks off with a segment featuring Madison Rayne, Sarita, Velvet Sky, and Lacey Von Erich. Sarita and Madison are hanging out in the women’s lockerroom and they’re gossiping. Eventually the subject gets switched to Velvet, and Madison starts to run her mouth unaware that Velvet and Lacey have both walked up behind her. Lacey attempts to cover Velvet’s ears so she can’t hear the mean things Madison is saying, but it fails and Sarita goes quiet. Madison wants to know what’s going on and of course, Velvet is standing behind her when she turns around. Lacey begs them to stop, but Velvet’s not having that and she looks down her nose at Madison. She tells Madison that if she has something to say then she better say it to her face. Sarita is in the background smirking, but Velvet calls her out next. She basically accuses Sarita of being the mystery biker chick and tells her that she should keep the helmet on her big ass head. Bitching ensues and once again, Lacey tries to break it up. Both Madison and Velvet snap at Lacey like she’s a five year old, and then Madison gets all cocky, saying that tonight she is going to be handed back her TNA Knockouts Championship. Velvet just rolls her eyes and mentions that she still has her title because she never lost it. Both girls try and buck up to one another, and poor Lacey. She’s just stuck in the middle of all of this and getting treated like crap. Sarita and Madison both walk away, and Velvet and Lacey go off in the opposite direction. TNA goes to commercial.

After a bit of pointless crap, Angelina Love and Taylor Wilde make their way to the ring. Angelina is still wearing the Knockouts Championship but that’s about to change. The Beautiful People music hits and Sarita walks out with Madison. Sarita and Taylor are jawing back and forth at one another during the entire entrance  and Madison is literally bouncing to the ring with a bright smile on her face. Once all that is finished, senior referee, Earl Hebner, stands in the middle of the ring with a microphone in his hand. He informs Angelina, as well as the crowd, that the Board of Directors have no proof that a member of the Beautiful People was riding that bike therefore Angelina has to surrender the championship. Madison starts demanding that she be handed the belt, but after Angelina passes it off she cold cocks Madison right in the kisser. Taylor attacks Sarita and the fight between these four talented ladies is underway!

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TNA Xplosion Watch (July 14, 2010): When Former Partners Collide

(Apologies for the belated Xplosion report! This one slipped by me. Apparently it happened a day before the street fight we saw on Impact.)

It was bound to happen. Not content to keep their implosion behind the scenes, we finally see Sarita take on her former tag team partner Taylor Wilde tonight. Their similar styles and exciting ring work together makes me anticipate this all the more. Who’ll come out on top?

 Out first is Sarita, in a blue and lime green one piece outfit. She’s taking a page from the Zack Ryder playbook however…there’s a piece missing from her right shoulder down to her upper arm. Okay. Brimming with confidence, she smugly makes her way down the ramp. It’s all about Sarita now! Next comes Taylor Wilde in her silver and black bikini top and skirt. Very cute! After a pose for the crowd, Taylor has her game face on as she marches to the ring, pointing at Sarita. Any hesitation Taylor may have felt about facing her former partner is gone, replaced by a focus that is pin point.

 As she climbs into the ring, Sarita has her hands up in a “hold on” gesture. She…apparently wants to shake hands with Taylor? At first, Wilde isn’t buying it. But Sarita is insistent…Taylor takes her hand and both women shake, then separate. Huh. This is a far cry from the ruthless, cold woman that we’ve seen the brunette morph into. Interesting. The bell rings and the two circle each other.

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Impact Write-Up (July 15th, 2010): Vintage Knockouts!

A lot of fans, myself included, were absolutely horrified at the hot mess that was the Victory Road pay-per-view. The Knockouts match had one shit-tastic ending and I don’t know about you, but I made the decision then and there to write TNA off. It’s hard enough to watch it these days anyway, but when you end a title match in such a ridiculous fashion, it’s enough to turn a fan off for good. Fortunately, my Diva Dirt duties require me to watch the KO action every Thursday and wow! I’m super glad I had to do just that this week. In addition to a pretty good match, we got a massive segment featuring the new champ, the Beautiful People, and that not so mysterious mystery biker chick. I know it’s probably hard for all of y’all to fathom that Impact was actually a good watch, but believe me it is. I even double checked it myself to make sure I wasn’t dreaming. The proof lies within the confines of this Write-Up so stop wasting your time reading this pointless introduction and watch the videos!


skip ahead to 5:40

The Knockouts waste no time getting down to business tonight. Sarita and Taylor Wilde are shown backstage, and according to Taz, the ladies are scheduled to meet in a street fight later on tonight. It seems like both girls have decided to start the match early, because Sarita slams Taylor into one of the backstage walls. The fight is on and Sarita is basically dominating it. She’s screaming at Taylor that she’s finally getting rid of the dead weight, and that now, everything is going to be about her. Taylor takes several stiff shots, but she fights back hard. She gets Sarita down and begins to punch and choke her. Sarita is back up soon enough and the fight spills into another part of the backstage area. Sarita throws Taylor into several walls, and eventually Taylor is able to muscle Sarita off of her. The ex-Knockouts Champ throws Sarita into a door and takes off. She’s seemingly searching for some type of weapon, but comes away empty-handed. That brings Taylor back to a waiting Sarita. The sexy brunette takes her turn bouncing off the wall, and then gets knocked into a piece of equipment. While Sarita is doubled over, Taylor starts to beat on her. Sarita is able to gain the advantage back and she starts telling Taylor that she has always been better than her, and that everyone knows it. Taylor is thrown into a piece of backstage furniture, and then kicked down to the ground.

Taylor bounces back up and grabs a steel pipe, which she swings wildly. Sarita, thankfully, ducks and the pipe slams into the wall above Sarita’s head. Sarita gets up and kicks Taylor away, but the blonde grabs a chair and starts to smack her former tag team partner with it. Sarita is momentarily stopped by this, but it doesn’t last long. She overpowers Taylor and throws her into the photo shoot area. Taylor has her head slammed into the ground and Sarita gets down with her. She finally locks Taylor into a submission move and starts bitching at her some more.

So of course Impact goes to commercial break.

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In Pictures: Mickie James & Saritaylor at K&S WrestleFest Yesterday

Former Diva, Mickie James and TNA Knockouts, Sarita and Taylor Wilde were some of the stars on hand at K&S WrestleFest yesterday. Mickie signed copies of her debut album, ‘Strangers & Angels’, while the feuding former Knockouts Tag Champs were at the Highspots.com booth with our own Amber Gertner. Mickie and Sarita look beautiful, though … Read more

TNA Xplosion Watch (July 7th, 2010): Lottalove and Lottahate

The past few weeks we’ve seen the implosion of the team Saritaylor on TNA Xplosion. Apparently fed up with lack of TV time and wins, Sarita violently turned on Taylor Wilde. Tonight, we see the return of Rosie Lottalove as she takes on Taylor Wilde. Will the Dark Angel make an impact here as she has the last few weeks?


(Skip to 2:58)

We see Rosie Lottalove relaxing before her match. She speaks of what makes her different from the knockouts, her determination to become Knockouts Champion “very soon,” and her upcoming match with Taylor Wilde. She knows Taylor is a former KO champion and that she’s small and fast. But Rosie is smart – she’ll catch Taylor and that’ll be all she wrote. The usual play on her size is all over this promo, but to be honest I’m distracted by that ten ton of eyeshadow on her eyes. Looks like the late Tammy Faye Baker. Rosie’s really beautiful without the gobs of makeup, I wish she’d tone it down.

We switch to Taylor Wilde who’s sitting on the floor of the locker room. She’s despondant yet fustrated with the blowout of her partnership and friendship with Sarita. She feels lost stepping into the ring without her friend and doesn’t know where things will go from here. One thing’s for certain – she’s taking all this pent up fustration out on Rosie Lottalove tonight. As we cut away from her, we see Sarita enter the building. She’s not about to discuss why she’s here either.

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TNA Xplosion Watch (July 2nd, 2010): Revenge of the Zombie Hot

Last week on Xplosion we saw Daffney take on Taylor Wilde. But before the match, a backstage segment showed us some surfacing tension between Sarita and Taylor. During the match, Sarita interfered, allowing Taylor to pick up the win. This week, it’s Daffney taking on Sarita as payback. Will Zombie Hot get her revenge?

We hear from both Sarita and Daffney on their upcoming match. Sarita claims that last week Taylor took out Daffney, so this week it’s her turn. Daffney (sporting a cute mini-veil with her tiny black top hat) says since Sarita interfered in her business last week, this week she IS Daffney’s business. And she’s feeling a little….crazy. Cue mad cackling. They really don’t give Daff enough promo time, I love it when she speaks. Anyways, we cut to the match.

Out first is Daffney sporting an all black ensemble. She’s looking as Zombie Hot as ever. We get a recap of last week’s events that led to this match. Next out is Sarita in a red and sky blue attire, with a design on the top that reminds me of either angel wings or Isis’ wings. She’s looking pretty confident as she strolls to the ring. As the bell rings, the crowd starts loud chants for Daffney. (I like these people, they have good taste!)

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Impact Write-Up (July 1st, 2010): ECW Originals, Weaves, And Bad Fashion Distract From What May Have Been A Good Match

Before I even get started, I want to give a big, Southern Belle thanks to Jennifer who graciously stepped in for me last week and forced herself to write about Impact.  I know that at times it can be depressing and rather unfortunate, but Jennifer was able to preserver and shed a beautiful, shining light on something I found repetitive and downright excruciating. She has inspired me to look at TNA this week with an open mind and a glass half-full approach, so Jennifer thank you for that. I will definitely be thinking of sunshine, rainbows, naughty time with my husband, Justin, and lots of ice cream.

Wow, did I really just use “Justin” and “rainbow” in the same sentence? Damn you all.

Ahem! Moving on to more important things tonight’s action. TNA Knockouts Champion, Madison Rayne, took on former champion and TNA Tag Team Champion, Taylor Wilde. Number one contender, Angelina Love, made her presence felt and in addition to the match, we got a fun backstage brawl involving Sarita, and a Chelsea appearance. Lots to talk about for a change.

Taylor Wilde is the first competitor in the ring. They make sure we know she’s a former Knockouts Champion and her outfit just leaves me scratching my head. Taylor, between you and I, that is not a flattering look for you! The champ, Miss Madison, is out next and she’s looking mighty lovely. Yeah, who am I kidding? Madison looks downright awful with her new hairdo. That’s a crying shame because she was so pretty before. Blah. Her outfit is great though. As Madison’s entrance takes place, the commentators run down Angelina’s dominance over Lacey and Velvet the previous two weeks, and finally it’s time for the match to get started. The girls lock up and Taylor takes Madison down early. She rolls over her, attempts a headlock, but Madison wiggles free and brings both back to their feet. She jerks Taylor’s head back by the hair and starts screaming in her face and waving her finger. Sheesh Madison. The referee slaps Madison on the arm to get her to stop and that understandably pisses off Madison because you’re not supposed to hit a woman. Madison whirls around to question his actions which allows Taylor to get back in the swing of things. She turns Madison around and slams her in the jaw with a convincing punch. Madison staggers but regains her balance and goes for a spear. Taylor ends up down on the mat and that gives Madison a chance to mount her and start punishing her.

The feisty little Knockout begins to slam Taylor’s head into the mat over and over, until the referee starts to bitch again. Madison unleashes her verbal fury on him but nonetheless, she gets up and drags Taylor over to the ropes. Taylor finds herself in a world of hurt as Madison starts choking her and pulling on her face. Madison backs off and sends Taylor to the opposite side of the ring. The blonde Canadian ends up using her momentum to reverse Madison’s offense and bring her down with a lazy looking hurricanrana. She attempts another fancy move, but Madison somersaults out of it. In the end, Taylor maintains her control and Madison ends up on the receiving end of another shot to the face. Taylor motions for Madison to get up and when she does, she pushes her against the ropes and chops her across the chest. Taylor goes to throw Madison across the ring, but the savvy BP member hangs tough and jerks Taylor down by the hair. Madison turns her back and Taylor takes the opportunity to run towards the top rope and spring onto it.

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In Video: Daffney vs Taylor Wilde on TNA Xplosion

Earlier this week, we wrote about a possible heel turn for Sarita based on her actions on the first episode of a newly relaunched Xplosion. Well, you can now watch all the Knockouts action from the show below — and there’s a lot of it!

We kick off with a video package featuring Daffney and Taylor Wilde:

Follow the cut for the match and backstage segment:

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Sarita Turning Heel in TNA?

Could former Knockouts Tag Team Champion, Sarita be turning heel? Diva Dirt reader Michael writes: Hey Diva Dirt, was just watching TNA Xplosion here in Australia and noticed some interesting Knockout action, it featured a backstage segment between Sarita and Taylor Wilde, basically Sarita was upset that Taylor was receiving a singles match against Daffney … Read more

Madison Rayne vs Taylor Wilde (Knockouts Title Match)

Erm, really? The Knockouts Championship is being defended on… the Internet? Whatever, TNA’s logic gives me a headache. But nonetheless, here’s the match between Madison Rayne and infrequently seen former Knockouts Champion, Taylor Wilde.

Despite the video logging in at 4 minutes and 40 seconds, the entrances alone shave off two minutes which means we are in store for an epicly short, Raw-esque two [and some change] minute match.

Madison Rayne begins by taunting Wilde but the former Knockouts Champion ain’t backing down, shoving Rayne for her jibes. Rayne comes at Taylor with a forearm but she very impressively counters into a pin predicament but Rayne kicks out. Rayne runs at Taylor but is hit with a drop-toe-hold and again, Taylor rolls up Madison trying to put her away quickly. Well, it is a championship match [on YouTube].

After a kickout, Wilde quickly hits the ropes and charges down Rayne before doing her Beautiful People-esque gyration for the crowd. She again tries to pin Madison but to no avail. Wilde tries to whip Rayne into the corner but the champion reverses, sending Wilde into the corner but she manages to catch herself and jump onto the middle rope and hits a nice crossbody on Madison. Another pin attempt.

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Impact Write-Up (May 27th, 2010): Impact Fails To Impress. Water Is Wet. Turbatu Is Red Clay. C’est Le Vie.

It’s just after 4 AM and I’m feeling quite sprightly at the moment. The French Open is on my television. Rafa Nadal is playing. The entire Impact show is up on YouTube so I don’t have to leave the comfort of my livingroom desk and big screen TV in order to recap the Knockout action for each and every one of you. At the time of this introduction, I have yet to watch the match itself but it features Lacey Von Erich. That fact alone makes this an epic in the making and I know that secretly all of you are closet Lacey fans. Without Lacey, you’d have nothing to look forward too or complain about! And speaking of our girl, she her part of the show involved a tag team title defense alongside the devious Velvet Sky. The two Beautiful People were in action against Sarita and Taylor Wilde, who to my knowledge have done nothing to earn a tag title shot, but whatev. At least they’re on television for like the third week in a row so I’m not going to complain.

The Knockout portion of Impact starts with a stupid promo for Halfpint Brawlers which isn’t a surprise if you read spoilers. Something named Puppet is sitting at the commentary table with Taz and Mike Tenay. Apparently he’s the owner of the new midget show and he puts it over before we go to the backstage area. Christy is standing by with Roxxi, who last week defeated Madison Rayne in a non-title match. Roxxi is wearing her ugly brown outfit again, but Christy sports a pair of fit jeans and a white wife beater. Christy talks about Roxxi’s victory over Madison and welcomes her back to TNA with open arms. Roxxi replies that it’s great to be back and that she’s looking forward to her time in TNA. As she’s talking, the video of her injury is being played. I’m totally shutting my eyes because it’s just far to gross to watch again. Roxxi says that the position she’s in now is a familiar one but this time, she’s not going to let her chances slip through her fingers. Roxxi’s pretty pumped and ready to go, and Christy decides to drop a bomb. She mentions to Roxxi that because of her (Roxxi’s) victory last week, Roxxi will be Madison at Slammiversary for the TNA Knockouts Championship. Roxxi gets all excited over the opportunity and basically freaks out. Christy is super giddy herself and Roxxi finally takes the microphone and tells Madison that she will meet her at Slammiversary.

Christy sends it back to the ring area where Sarita and Taylor are waiting for the Beautiful People. Puppet is invited to stick around for commentary (oh joy) and the BPs begin to make their way to the ring. I refuse to talk about their entrance ever again so to take up this writing space I want to say that Rafael Nadal is wearing my favorite color combination at this year’s French Open – lime green and turquoise. True story. Instead of discussing the in-ring action, the announcers and the midget begin to talk about Halfpint Brawlers. Shocking. Velvet and Sarita are looking to kick things off and Sarita catches Velvet around the waist. Velvet reverses whatever Sarita was planning and hiptosses her to the mat. Velvet’s super proud of herself but Sarita’s not down for long. She Shawn Michaels’ up to her feet and when Velvet turns around she shrieks and goes back at Sarita. Sarita brings her down and goes for a quick roll-up, but she only gets a two count. Velvet’s back up in a flash but is brought down with an elbow. Sarita makes the tag to Taylor, then splashes Velvet just to do it. Taylor mounts her first bit of offense by somersaulting on top of Velvet and she goes for the cover. Another two count.

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Impact Write-Up (May 13th, 2010): Two Times the Tara, Lacey Von Face?, More Randomness

So it’s been awhile since I’ve had to do an Impact Write-Up and to be honest, I’ve enjoyed my little vacation from the asinine side show that has become Total Non-Stop Action. I, for one, am incredibly glad that TNA copped out on this whole Monday Night Wars 2.0 thing because they were getting anally raped and not in some sadistic, kinky way. Once upon a time, the Knockouts flourished on Thursday nights. They ran the company with their perfectly manicured hands balled into tiny iron fists. They set the standard for women’s mainstream wrestling and made the Divas seethe with envy over their greatness. If there truly is a wrestling god (I’m talking to you, JBL!) then this move for TNA back to Thursday nights will light a fire under the collective asses of “management” over there and us Knockout fans will get to see our girls shine like the sun on a perfect, late Spring day. No more clouds in the sky for the Knockouts. Use them wisely, TNA. They are your ratings!

How’s that for an intro?

So this week’s Impact is the first official Thursday show, not to mention the last show before TNA Sacrifice. There was a lot of Knockout action tonight and you know, it actually seems slightly interesting. Tara competed not once, but twice tonight against Taylor Wilde and Sarita. The Beautiful People had a backstage segment and Madison Rayne finally told everyone they needed to let the new girl run with the ball and basically just accept the fact she is champion. Velvet Sky continued to be snarky towards Lacey Von Erich, who showed the first signs of what I feel could be a face turn coming in her future. And Chelsea starred in a fun angle that basically dominated the entire show. I hope you guys are ready for all the HKA… hot Knockout action!

The Beautiful People are backstage with Jeremy Borash and it’s basically Madison’s chance to get people hyped up for Sacrifice. She calls Tara out on her ridiculous behavior and psycho-like obsession for the Knockouts Championship. Madison reminds everyone that she is champion now and that basically it’s her turn to run the Knockouts division. Madison puts over the fact that she’s a fresh face for the division and then Velvet chimes in that all the gold will stay where it belongs come Sunday because she says so. Lacey Von Erich, who’s been spastic this entire time, cuts Velvet off before she can finish, steals Velvet’s line, and basically runs off to pee. Velvet gets seriously irritated but Madison gently reminds her that Lacey is really pretty and the segment fades back to the ring area. Tara versus Taylor Wilde is next.

Taylor Wilde is out to the ring first and she has Sarita with her. They do their horrible ring entrance (what’s up with female tag teams having choreographed entrances now?) and then Tara makes her way out. She’s looking fit and feisty, and we get reminded about all the drama she had last week with Taylor and Sarita. Wilde is attempting to look tough at this point and honestly, her acting makes me laugh. She’s like a little poodle who’s trying to stare down a raging bulldog and it’s not going to end pretty for her, I’m sure. The referee orders Sarita out of the ring and now we have two former Knockouts Champions about to go at it.

Tara turns her back to Wilde, and begins to badger Sarita. That gives the Canadian a chance to catch Tara off guard and she fights the bigger woman down to the mat. The referee pulls Taylor off of Tara, and Tara rolls out of the ring. She attempts to collect herself, but Taylor is perched on the ring apron and comes flying off. Tara is taken to the ground, mounted, and punched repeatedly in the face and head. Taylor is once again pulled off Tara and she’s not really overjoyed by it. Tara rolls into the ring and when Taylor follows after her, Tara attempts to take her down. Taylor ducks and takes Tara down with a knee to the abdomen.

Tara backs up to the ropes and begs Taylor to stop. The blonde is understandably weary at this request and motions at Tara to come at her. Tara is pleading with Taylor, saying that they’re friends and whatnot, and all Taylor can do is glare. She’s not buying it and for some reason, she gets the bright idea to charge at Tara. Tara sends her flying through the ropes and Taylor lands on the entrance ramp. Tara gets out of the ring and slams Taylor’s face off the floor only once before tossing her back inside. She grips the ropes and attempts to somersault onto Taylor, but Taylor moves and Tara lands on her pancake!

Taylor springs into action via the middle rope and launches herself off. Tara catches her with a sloppy kick to the stomach but Taylor sells it anyway because that’s her job. Tara goes for the cover and gets the three count, which is a shady ending to a pretty nice little match but oh well. Tara rips off her own kneebrace and begins to beat down Taylor with it. Taylor acts like she’s getting nailed to the cross. Apparently the pain she’s feeling from this post match attack is excruciating. Sarita finally makes the save and Tara bolts, receiving a nice round of applause and a light chant on her way out.

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Impact Write-Up (May 3rd, 2010): TNA Should Cleanse Their Booking Staff, One Ugly Person At A Time

When it comes to TNA, they always drop the ball when it comes to the live shows so imagine my surprise and shock when they exceeded even my low expectations this week. Announced over the weekend, was a title match where all three titles were on the line; The Beautiful People defending against Tara, Taylor Wilde, and Sarita. It sounds good on paper (sort of…) but it was an actual hot mess on television. The MIA tag team known as Saritaylor were mere stand-ins tonight and TNA’s weird booking once again came into play. If you want to watch the mess unfold, go ahead and click the video. If you don’t, then I don’t blame you. I want to forget Impact was even on television last night.

Even though it was a crappy night for the Knockouts as a whole, it was a decent night for the Beautiful People. Earlier in the show, Madison Rayne, Velvet Sky, and Lacey Von Erich were seen backstage in their lockerroom. All three girls were either sitting or standing at their vanity table and they were messing with their make-up and just generally looking at themselves in the mirror. They were having a conversation about how hard it was to be a champion and Lacey starts talking about how her back is always killing her. She goes on to say that things aren’t so bad during the day but when she wakes up after a good night’s sleep she is basically in a world of hurt. Velvet gives her a look and politely tells her she’s not supposed to wear the title to bed. Lacey is like “I thought we weren’t supposed to take them off” and the other two girls just groan. Madison is a little annoyed that they’re being forced to defend the belts again but Velvet calms her down and states what we all know to be true: the BP are the entire Knockouts division. Velvet goes on to say that no one is a threat to them and this and that, and the segment ends with Lacey triumphantly announcing that they weren’t supposed to take the belts off and that she knew that all along.

Tara and Saritaylor are in the ring as the Beautiful People begin to make their way down the entrance ramp. I’m not going to bore you with the details of their entrance but it’s certainly sparkly this week. Tenay and Taz run down the rules for the match and when the bell rings, Tara decides she’s going to begin the match for her team. She tries to tell this to Sarita and Taylor, and when they don’t seem to get it, she demonstrates by shoving Taylor rather stiffly a few times to get her out of the ring. Taylor is like whatever and does what she’s told and Tara turns her back. Lacey is waiting for her and she’s looking pumped to start this match. The sultry blonde is decked in silver and black, and she’s ready for action. Lacey begins to dance around in the ring much to the chagrin of Tara, and Tara finally kicks her, doubling Von Erich over in pain. She slams Lacey down, rolls over her for a pin, but changes her mind and goes for a front guillotine choke instead. Tara shoots dirty looks over her shoulder at her partners while the referee tries to get her to let up on Lacey. Finally she spits at Taylor and Sarita, which is pretty unsanitary, and she picks Lacey up.

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Taylor Wilde: Release Rumours Not True

Former Knockouts Champion, Taylor Wilde took to her Twitter page last night to dismiss reports that her contract won’t be renewed. Wilde wrote: * Thank you all for your concern! The current rumours about me leaving TNA or being released are 100% NOT true. You’d hear it from me 1st! * For the record I … Read more

Two Former Knockouts Champions May Be Leaving TNA

Two former TNA Knockouts Champions’ futures look uncertain going into next month. Three time Knockouts Champion, Tara tweeted that her contract with the company is set to expire next month amidst rumours that she may be leaving the company. The Wrestling Observer newsletter says: “Her contract expires at the end of next month and she … Read more

Taylor Wilde “Not Too Thrilled” With Being Left Off TV

It’s no secret that many think TNA’s overall product has declined in quality as of late. If you’re one of those people, Taylor Wilde seems to agree with you. On Twitter in the small hours of Tuesday, Taylor responded to a fan’s complaints about her recent absence from television, saying: “Yeah……….I’m not too thrilled about … Read more