Wednesday, July 16, 2025
Submit News

WWE Superstar Says Lacey Von Erich Has No Talent

WWE Superstar, Goldust had some less than flattering critiques about TNA’s Lacey Von Erich last night on Twitter. The Superstar posted several tweets during last night’s Knockouts Tag Team Championship match on Impact. Read below: * Lacy [sic] has no talent whatsoever. * She is horrible * Great family but her no Goldy went onto … Read more

Impact Write-Up (July 29th, 2010): New Number One Contender, Angelina Love! Again.

In a strange attempt to prove that Hell has indeed froze over, TNA put together their second consecutive week of competent story telling. It’s shocking, I realize that, but us scorned Knockout fans are going to have to try very hard to wrap our heads around this rare, but exciting encounter. This week, the Beautiful People continue to have a go at one another, despite the fact they remain in control of the Knockouts division. And a brand new number one contender to the Knockouts Championship is determined in what turned out to be a pretty impressive match. What’s wrong with you TNA?! Don’t you know that you’re not supposed to make sense?

The Knockouts are first seen tonight courtesy of a backstage segment featuring the Beautiful People. Lacey Von Erich and Velvet Sky are discussing the recent happenings within the BP camp. Velvet is fussing with her make-up while she bitches about Madison; she’s still furious over everything. Lacey is trying to tell Velvet it’s in their best interest to stop while they’re ahead and just make up with one another. She wants to be best friends again. Velvet is not willing to do that. The conversation continues on and Knockouts Champion, Madison Rayne, enters into the picture. She walks in and stares Velvet down. Velvet demands to know what she wants and Madison says that she’s been thinking a lot about the situation between all of them and she thinks it would be stupid to break up the Beautiful People while they own every belt in the company. She continues on to say that they’ve been running the division since day one and that reign of dominance does not need to come to an end. Lacey is nodding along, agreeing with everything Madison is saying.

Velvet isn’t sold.

Velvet jumps to her feet and gets right up in Madison’s face. She tells her that the only reason the BP’s reign of terror is in jeopardy is because Madison is the one who clearly stated that she did not need the Beautiful People any longer. Velvet continues her rant by saying Madison is the one who took it upon herself to invite another member into their group without consulting herself and Lacey, and to top it all off, it was Madison who decided to team with Sarita last week. While Velvet is freaking out, Lacey is in the middle mumbling little things to Madison such as “we forgive you” ect. Velvet snaps at Lacey to shut up and Madison finally gets a chance to defend herself. Madison says that as far as her relationship with Sarita goes, Angelina and Sarita have a number one contender’s match for her Knockouts Championship tonight to which Velvet smirks “some friend.” Madison continues on by saying that when her back up did arrive last week, she extended the offer to both BP members to join them. Lacey happily chimes in that she took the invitation. Madison says that Velvet declined and now she doesn’t know what else Velvet could possibly want from her. Lacey adds that Velvet changed her mind. She didn’t.

Velvet said it’s to late for Madison to apologize. Madison shakes her head and says that she’s not going to beg Velvet for anything, but she does want things to go back to the way they were before. Lacey chirps that she doesn’t mind begging and she begins to do so. Madison then apologizes, quite a few times, and Lacey continues to plead with Velvet to forgive Madison. Velvet’s really annoyed over the situation but she does start to cave and very reluctantly agrees to a truce. The BPs hug it out and Lacey basically starts to cry because they’re all a family again.

Read more

Impact Write-Up (July 22nd, 2010): Confusion Reigns Supreme But Not On Our Part For A Change

Last week on Impact, the Knockouts took an unexpected, yet welcomed step in the right direction in terms of their booking. Whoever wrote the show or whatever gave all of us long suffering KO fans a well deserved treat in the form of a brilliantly scripted and well acted in-ring segment and a pretty darn good streetfight. Personally, it was almost to much for me to handle you know what I’m sayin’? This week, the action wasn’t overwhelming but it was still great, and very enjoyable to watch.

Tonight’s Knockout portion of Impact kicks off with a segment featuring Madison Rayne, Sarita, Velvet Sky, and Lacey Von Erich. Sarita and Madison are hanging out in the women’s lockerroom and they’re gossiping. Eventually the subject gets switched to Velvet, and Madison starts to run her mouth unaware that Velvet and Lacey have both walked up behind her. Lacey attempts to cover Velvet’s ears so she can’t hear the mean things Madison is saying, but it fails and Sarita goes quiet. Madison wants to know what’s going on and of course, Velvet is standing behind her when she turns around. Lacey begs them to stop, but Velvet’s not having that and she looks down her nose at Madison. She tells Madison that if she has something to say then she better say it to her face. Sarita is in the background smirking, but Velvet calls her out next. She basically accuses Sarita of being the mystery biker chick and tells her that she should keep the helmet on her big ass head. Bitching ensues and once again, Lacey tries to break it up. Both Madison and Velvet snap at Lacey like she’s a five year old, and then Madison gets all cocky, saying that tonight she is going to be handed back her TNA Knockouts Championship. Velvet just rolls her eyes and mentions that she still has her title because she never lost it. Both girls try and buck up to one another, and poor Lacey. She’s just stuck in the middle of all of this and getting treated like crap. Sarita and Madison both walk away, and Velvet and Lacey go off in the opposite direction. TNA goes to commercial.

After a bit of pointless crap, Angelina Love and Taylor Wilde make their way to the ring. Angelina is still wearing the Knockouts Championship but that’s about to change. The Beautiful People music hits and Sarita walks out with Madison. Sarita and Taylor are jawing back and forth at one another during the entire entrance  and Madison is literally bouncing to the ring with a bright smile on her face. Once all that is finished, senior referee, Earl Hebner, stands in the middle of the ring with a microphone in his hand. He informs Angelina, as well as the crowd, that the Board of Directors have no proof that a member of the Beautiful People was riding that bike therefore Angelina has to surrender the championship. Madison starts demanding that she be handed the belt, but after Angelina passes it off she cold cocks Madison right in the kisser. Taylor attacks Sarita and the fight between these four talented ladies is underway!

Read more

Impact Write-Up (July 15th, 2010): Vintage Knockouts!

A lot of fans, myself included, were absolutely horrified at the hot mess that was the Victory Road pay-per-view. The Knockouts match had one shit-tastic ending and I don’t know about you, but I made the decision then and there to write TNA off. It’s hard enough to watch it these days anyway, but when you end a title match in such a ridiculous fashion, it’s enough to turn a fan off for good. Fortunately, my Diva Dirt duties require me to watch the KO action every Thursday and wow! I’m super glad I had to do just that this week. In addition to a pretty good match, we got a massive segment featuring the new champ, the Beautiful People, and that not so mysterious mystery biker chick. I know it’s probably hard for all of y’all to fathom that Impact was actually a good watch, but believe me it is. I even double checked it myself to make sure I wasn’t dreaming. The proof lies within the confines of this Write-Up so stop wasting your time reading this pointless introduction and watch the videos!


skip ahead to 5:40

The Knockouts waste no time getting down to business tonight. Sarita and Taylor Wilde are shown backstage, and according to Taz, the ladies are scheduled to meet in a street fight later on tonight. It seems like both girls have decided to start the match early, because Sarita slams Taylor into one of the backstage walls. The fight is on and Sarita is basically dominating it. She’s screaming at Taylor that she’s finally getting rid of the dead weight, and that now, everything is going to be about her. Taylor takes several stiff shots, but she fights back hard. She gets Sarita down and begins to punch and choke her. Sarita is back up soon enough and the fight spills into another part of the backstage area. Sarita throws Taylor into several walls, and eventually Taylor is able to muscle Sarita off of her. The ex-Knockouts Champ throws Sarita into a door and takes off. She’s seemingly searching for some type of weapon, but comes away empty-handed. That brings Taylor back to a waiting Sarita. The sexy brunette takes her turn bouncing off the wall, and then gets knocked into a piece of equipment. While Sarita is doubled over, Taylor starts to beat on her. Sarita is able to gain the advantage back and she starts telling Taylor that she has always been better than her, and that everyone knows it. Taylor is thrown into a piece of backstage furniture, and then kicked down to the ground.

Taylor bounces back up and grabs a steel pipe, which she swings wildly. Sarita, thankfully, ducks and the pipe slams into the wall above Sarita’s head. Sarita gets up and kicks Taylor away, but the blonde grabs a chair and starts to smack her former tag team partner with it. Sarita is momentarily stopped by this, but it doesn’t last long. She overpowers Taylor and throws her into the photo shoot area. Taylor has her head slammed into the ground and Sarita gets down with her. She finally locks Taylor into a submission move and starts bitching at her some more.

So of course Impact goes to commercial break.

Read more

Impact Write-Up (June 17th, 2010): Welcome To The Angelina Love Express. Destination: Victory Road.

I just ripped off a Sue Sylvester quote for my title this week. I’m so sorry.

I don’t know about you guys, but the lack of Knockouts on last week’s Impact left me pretty bitter and disgusted. It was the last show before their pay-per-view extravaganza, Slammiversary, and they did absolutely nothing to build up to Roxxi versus Madison Rayne for the TNA Knockouts Championship. As awful as that was, the worst was yet to come as we witnessed an absolute travesty take place at Slammiversary. Roxxi was unceremoniously fired from TNA with little, to no explanation and we had to watch her once again sacrifice herself for this company that seemingly has no respect for her sacrifices and work ethic. The way TNA has treated Roxxi is despicable, but life goes on and now I suggest that all of us fans move on as well. As we found out tonight, Angelina Love is now back in action and she already has a title shot at TNA’s next PPV, Victory Road. With that in mind, Angelina stepped into the ring against Lacey von Erich, the woman who replaced her in the Beautiful People. The match wasn’t to shabby which is a lot more than I can say for Angelina’s ugly ring gear


skip ahead to 1:40

Mid-way through the first half of Impact, the camera cuts to a backstage shot of a pair of nicely tanned legs. One of the TNA Knockouts is laying down, or laying out, and as the camera pans up the female’s body, the guys who watch are treated to a barely covered backside. On said backside sits one of the TNA Knockouts Tag Team Championship belts and upon further review, the Knockout who is getting a massage is our girl, Lacey. She’s smiling and at peace with her surroundings as the masseur goes to work on her lower back. One of the commentators (Mike Tenay if I remember right) makes a remark that Lacey has an odd way of preparing for her match tonight.

Angelina made her way to the ring later on. We didn’t really get to see the ring entrance thanks to a video package of some TNA action figures that no one is going to buy, but whatever. I’m not exactly bothered. Angelina is already talking and she mentions that because she’s been sitting on the sidelines for the past six weeks thanks to an injury, she now knows how precarious an athlete’s position in life can be. It basically put everything in perspective for her, because Angelina realizes that every match could very well end up being her last because of all the risk factors involved in wrestling; one wrong move can end everything. Angelina says she is not going to waste another second of her career. She calls out Lacey, saying that it’s them two tonight, and come next week, she’s going to get Velvet. Angelina continues on by saying that at Victory Road she will regain her Knockouts Championship against Madison. Angelina tells Lacey to get out there now and the BP’s theme music hits.

Read more

Scrapped Knockouts Match Airs on International Impact (Full Match Report)

Diva Dirt reader, David Myles wrote in to tell us that a match scrapped from this past Thursday’s episode of Impact has aired internationally, particularly in Australia and the UK.

The match pit #1 Contender Roxxi and newcomer Rosie Lottalove against The Beautiful People’s Lacey Von Erich and Velvet Sky on the go-home show before tonight’s Slammiversary pay per view.

The Motor City Machine Guns came down on commetary, Roxxi’s music played and her and Rosie made their way to the ring in a pretty funny entrance. (Roxxi again wearing the brown outfit). The guns are horrified they have to be on commetary watching Rosie just to get on TV, but they call her ‘hot’ nonetheless. They replay the events from last week with Madison and Rosie. The opponents Velvet and Lacey enter (sans Madison Rayne), and the Guns compare entrances of Rosie and TBP. A few fat jokes and we get to the match.

Rosie starts off against Velvet, Velvet mocks Rosie by shaking her ‘thang’, to which Rosie shakes her own. Velvet charges and gets knocked down by Rosie before tagging in Lacey, who also mocks Rosie by walking in with her arms outstretched (a la trish mocking ‘fat’ lita), before shoving Rosie, who doesn’t move, Rosie shoves Lacey back and sends her into next week.

Lacey composes herself before attempting to bodyslam Rosie (yep…) even with Velvet’s encouragement she fails to lift Rosie, and Rosie easily slams Lacey before tagging in Roxxi who hits a sloppy dropkick on LVE, before Lacey tags in Velvet. Velvet charges and is dropped with a drop toe hold, she grabs Vel Vel with an arm wrench before allowing Rosie to tag herself in (after being slightly out of reach and missing the first tag attempt ~lulz) Rosie hits a standing axe-handle to Velvet before continuing to work over the arm. Roxxi (for some reason) is trying to get into the ring or around to Lacey, but anyway, manages to accidently distract the referee, allowing Velvet to pull Rosie’s hair and get her in position for LVE to hit her across the back of the leg with the infrequently seen ‘ugly stick’. Rosie sells it like she had been shot in the leg, and Lacey tags in and hits a double team ‘wish bone’ on Rosie, Lacey works over the leg before tagging Velvet back in.

Read the rest:

Read more

Impact Write-Up (May 27th, 2010): Impact Fails To Impress. Water Is Wet. Turbatu Is Red Clay. C’est Le Vie.

It’s just after 4 AM and I’m feeling quite sprightly at the moment. The French Open is on my television. Rafa Nadal is playing. The entire Impact show is up on YouTube so I don’t have to leave the comfort of my livingroom desk and big screen TV in order to recap the Knockout action for each and every one of you. At the time of this introduction, I have yet to watch the match itself but it features Lacey Von Erich. That fact alone makes this an epic in the making and I know that secretly all of you are closet Lacey fans. Without Lacey, you’d have nothing to look forward too or complain about! And speaking of our girl, she her part of the show involved a tag team title defense alongside the devious Velvet Sky. The two Beautiful People were in action against Sarita and Taylor Wilde, who to my knowledge have done nothing to earn a tag title shot, but whatev. At least they’re on television for like the third week in a row so I’m not going to complain.

The Knockout portion of Impact starts with a stupid promo for Halfpint Brawlers which isn’t a surprise if you read spoilers. Something named Puppet is sitting at the commentary table with Taz and Mike Tenay. Apparently he’s the owner of the new midget show and he puts it over before we go to the backstage area. Christy is standing by with Roxxi, who last week defeated Madison Rayne in a non-title match. Roxxi is wearing her ugly brown outfit again, but Christy sports a pair of fit jeans and a white wife beater. Christy talks about Roxxi’s victory over Madison and welcomes her back to TNA with open arms. Roxxi replies that it’s great to be back and that she’s looking forward to her time in TNA. As she’s talking, the video of her injury is being played. I’m totally shutting my eyes because it’s just far to gross to watch again. Roxxi says that the position she’s in now is a familiar one but this time, she’s not going to let her chances slip through her fingers. Roxxi’s pretty pumped and ready to go, and Christy decides to drop a bomb. She mentions to Roxxi that because of her (Roxxi’s) victory last week, Roxxi will be Madison at Slammiversary for the TNA Knockouts Championship. Roxxi gets all excited over the opportunity and basically freaks out. Christy is super giddy herself and Roxxi finally takes the microphone and tells Madison that she will meet her at Slammiversary.

Christy sends it back to the ring area where Sarita and Taylor are waiting for the Beautiful People. Puppet is invited to stick around for commentary (oh joy) and the BPs begin to make their way to the ring. I refuse to talk about their entrance ever again so to take up this writing space I want to say that Rafael Nadal is wearing my favorite color combination at this year’s French Open – lime green and turquoise. True story. Instead of discussing the in-ring action, the announcers and the midget begin to talk about Halfpint Brawlers. Shocking. Velvet and Sarita are looking to kick things off and Sarita catches Velvet around the waist. Velvet reverses whatever Sarita was planning and hiptosses her to the mat. Velvet’s super proud of herself but Sarita’s not down for long. She Shawn Michaels’ up to her feet and when Velvet turns around she shrieks and goes back at Sarita. Sarita brings her down and goes for a quick roll-up, but she only gets a two count. Velvet’s back up in a flash but is brought down with an elbow. Sarita makes the tag to Taylor, then splashes Velvet just to do it. Taylor mounts her first bit of offense by somersaulting on top of Velvet and she goes for the cover. Another two count.

Read more

Impact Write-Up (May 13th, 2010): Two Times the Tara, Lacey Von Face?, More Randomness

So it’s been awhile since I’ve had to do an Impact Write-Up and to be honest, I’ve enjoyed my little vacation from the asinine side show that has become Total Non-Stop Action. I, for one, am incredibly glad that TNA copped out on this whole Monday Night Wars 2.0 thing because they were getting anally raped and not in some sadistic, kinky way. Once upon a time, the Knockouts flourished on Thursday nights. They ran the company with their perfectly manicured hands balled into tiny iron fists. They set the standard for women’s mainstream wrestling and made the Divas seethe with envy over their greatness. If there truly is a wrestling god (I’m talking to you, JBL!) then this move for TNA back to Thursday nights will light a fire under the collective asses of “management” over there and us Knockout fans will get to see our girls shine like the sun on a perfect, late Spring day. No more clouds in the sky for the Knockouts. Use them wisely, TNA. They are your ratings!

How’s that for an intro?

So this week’s Impact is the first official Thursday show, not to mention the last show before TNA Sacrifice. There was a lot of Knockout action tonight and you know, it actually seems slightly interesting. Tara competed not once, but twice tonight against Taylor Wilde and Sarita. The Beautiful People had a backstage segment and Madison Rayne finally told everyone they needed to let the new girl run with the ball and basically just accept the fact she is champion. Velvet Sky continued to be snarky towards Lacey Von Erich, who showed the first signs of what I feel could be a face turn coming in her future. And Chelsea starred in a fun angle that basically dominated the entire show. I hope you guys are ready for all the HKA… hot Knockout action!

The Beautiful People are backstage with Jeremy Borash and it’s basically Madison’s chance to get people hyped up for Sacrifice. She calls Tara out on her ridiculous behavior and psycho-like obsession for the Knockouts Championship. Madison reminds everyone that she is champion now and that basically it’s her turn to run the Knockouts division. Madison puts over the fact that she’s a fresh face for the division and then Velvet chimes in that all the gold will stay where it belongs come Sunday because she says so. Lacey Von Erich, who’s been spastic this entire time, cuts Velvet off before she can finish, steals Velvet’s line, and basically runs off to pee. Velvet gets seriously irritated but Madison gently reminds her that Lacey is really pretty and the segment fades back to the ring area. Tara versus Taylor Wilde is next.

Taylor Wilde is out to the ring first and she has Sarita with her. They do their horrible ring entrance (what’s up with female tag teams having choreographed entrances now?) and then Tara makes her way out. She’s looking fit and feisty, and we get reminded about all the drama she had last week with Taylor and Sarita. Wilde is attempting to look tough at this point and honestly, her acting makes me laugh. She’s like a little poodle who’s trying to stare down a raging bulldog and it’s not going to end pretty for her, I’m sure. The referee orders Sarita out of the ring and now we have two former Knockouts Champions about to go at it.

Tara turns her back to Wilde, and begins to badger Sarita. That gives the Canadian a chance to catch Tara off guard and she fights the bigger woman down to the mat. The referee pulls Taylor off of Tara, and Tara rolls out of the ring. She attempts to collect herself, but Taylor is perched on the ring apron and comes flying off. Tara is taken to the ground, mounted, and punched repeatedly in the face and head. Taylor is once again pulled off Tara and she’s not really overjoyed by it. Tara rolls into the ring and when Taylor follows after her, Tara attempts to take her down. Taylor ducks and takes Tara down with a knee to the abdomen.

Tara backs up to the ropes and begs Taylor to stop. The blonde is understandably weary at this request and motions at Tara to come at her. Tara is pleading with Taylor, saying that they’re friends and whatnot, and all Taylor can do is glare. She’s not buying it and for some reason, she gets the bright idea to charge at Tara. Tara sends her flying through the ropes and Taylor lands on the entrance ramp. Tara gets out of the ring and slams Taylor’s face off the floor only once before tossing her back inside. She grips the ropes and attempts to somersault onto Taylor, but Taylor moves and Tara lands on her pancake!

Taylor springs into action via the middle rope and launches herself off. Tara catches her with a sloppy kick to the stomach but Taylor sells it anyway because that’s her job. Tara goes for the cover and gets the three count, which is a shady ending to a pretty nice little match but oh well. Tara rips off her own kneebrace and begins to beat down Taylor with it. Taylor acts like she’s getting nailed to the cross. Apparently the pain she’s feeling from this post match attack is excruciating. Sarita finally makes the save and Tara bolts, receiving a nice round of applause and a light chant on her way out.

Read more

Impact Write-Up (May 3rd, 2010): TNA Should Cleanse Their Booking Staff, One Ugly Person At A Time

When it comes to TNA, they always drop the ball when it comes to the live shows so imagine my surprise and shock when they exceeded even my low expectations this week. Announced over the weekend, was a title match where all three titles were on the line; The Beautiful People defending against Tara, Taylor Wilde, and Sarita. It sounds good on paper (sort of…) but it was an actual hot mess on television. The MIA tag team known as Saritaylor were mere stand-ins tonight and TNA’s weird booking once again came into play. If you want to watch the mess unfold, go ahead and click the video. If you don’t, then I don’t blame you. I want to forget Impact was even on television last night.

Even though it was a crappy night for the Knockouts as a whole, it was a decent night for the Beautiful People. Earlier in the show, Madison Rayne, Velvet Sky, and Lacey Von Erich were seen backstage in their lockerroom. All three girls were either sitting or standing at their vanity table and they were messing with their make-up and just generally looking at themselves in the mirror. They were having a conversation about how hard it was to be a champion and Lacey starts talking about how her back is always killing her. She goes on to say that things aren’t so bad during the day but when she wakes up after a good night’s sleep she is basically in a world of hurt. Velvet gives her a look and politely tells her she’s not supposed to wear the title to bed. Lacey is like “I thought we weren’t supposed to take them off” and the other two girls just groan. Madison is a little annoyed that they’re being forced to defend the belts again but Velvet calms her down and states what we all know to be true: the BP are the entire Knockouts division. Velvet goes on to say that no one is a threat to them and this and that, and the segment ends with Lacey triumphantly announcing that they weren’t supposed to take the belts off and that she knew that all along.

Tara and Saritaylor are in the ring as the Beautiful People begin to make their way down the entrance ramp. I’m not going to bore you with the details of their entrance but it’s certainly sparkly this week. Tenay and Taz run down the rules for the match and when the bell rings, Tara decides she’s going to begin the match for her team. She tries to tell this to Sarita and Taylor, and when they don’t seem to get it, she demonstrates by shoving Taylor rather stiffly a few times to get her out of the ring. Taylor is like whatever and does what she’s told and Tara turns her back. Lacey is waiting for her and she’s looking pumped to start this match. The sultry blonde is decked in silver and black, and she’s ready for action. Lacey begins to dance around in the ring much to the chagrin of Tara, and Tara finally kicks her, doubling Von Erich over in pain. She slams Lacey down, rolls over her for a pin, but changes her mind and goes for a front guillotine choke instead. Tara shoots dirty looks over her shoulder at her partners while the referee tries to get her to let up on Lacey. Finally she spits at Taylor and Sarita, which is pretty unsanitary, and she picks Lacey up.

Read more

Impact Write-Up (April 19th, 2010): Really TNA? Really?

For all the crappy booking we’ve been forced to watch on TNA as of late, this past Sunday’s Lockdown was a refreshing treat. The cage match between The Beautiful People and Angelina and Tara signaled the end of some old angles and the beginning of some fresh ones. We were privy to a Tara turn, a brand new Knockouts Champion, and the culmination of the Beautiful People who have now reached their highest peak. The thought of a face Angelina and pyscho Tara feud was salivating to say the least and the announcement of a Knockouts Tag Team Championship match for Impact with the stipulation that Daffney would have a mystery partner led to plenty of afternoon speculation of just who that could be. Impact looked promising and the Knockouts seemed to be floating leisurely up, up, up.

Then Impact aired and what we got was a horribly short, stupidly booked match that made little if any sense. An injured competitor made her return and it went unnoticed because she wasn’t given a ring entrance. Angelina and Tara were left off the show which lead to much shaking of the head. How can you have such a dramatic angle the night before and not have it picked up or even mentioned on the next show? We got to watch Lacey Von Erich wrestle instead of Madison Rayne, who’s Knockouts Championship win wasn’t given the proper respect. Then we had to watch a big, powerful woman go down to an aerosol can of spray and get pinned for her team. There wasn’t really anything good about Impact. There wasn’t anything bad, either. It was all ugly considering everything that could have been done.

As I stated earlier, Daffney and ODB weren’t given entrances. This random ass pairing is pretty ridiculous in my opinion. It’s great that they decided to use someone different, but to pair her with Daffney? These two have nothing in common and to my knowledge, no previous interaction with one another. Maybe TNA were going for the comedy effect by making these two oddballs a team but it simply didn’t work. They were already in the ring as the pre-match glitz came to fruition which made it even more strange because TNA went out of their way to promote this match as something that could potentially be interesting. Whatever, right?

As the Beautiful People come to the ring it’s clear that the new Knockouts Champion isn’t going to be wrestling tonight. Madison is dressed in a little black dress with strappy wedge sandals. Despite all this, the ring announcer says she is going to be in the match anyway, while Lacey is the one at ringside. Madison didn’t even try to hide the can of what we’re going to call hairspray for the sake of this recap. I mean you can just see it and tell she is going to use it and that’s how the match is going to end. After TBP did their thing, Daffney and Lacey are two who decide to start the match off. It takes all of two seconds for Lacey to change her mind about that and she tags out to Velvet Sky before the match even properly begins.

Read more

Lockdown in Review: It’s A Beautiful World and We All Just Live In It

It’s definitely a beautiful world these days when it comes to TNA. Last night on Lockdown, quintessential Beautiful People jobber, Madison Rayne, shocked the wrestling world as we know it and became the new TNA Knockouts Champion. The surprising win came just weeks after the title had changed hands in the controversial Lockbox segment. With the way TNA works these days, nothing should come as a surprise, but putting the title on Madison Rayne definitely made for great television last night in St. Louis. Lets take a look back at Madison’s historic win, as well as the long anticipated heel turn of Tara.

The Knockout portion of Lockdown begins with a video package highlighting the hot mess that has been the intertwining storyline these five women have found themselves in over the past couple of months. A rundown of the rules also takes place and the Beautiful People are the first team out. These three women look absolutely stunning. The best part of pay-per-views is the new ring attire that always debuts, and TBP did not disappoint. Between their amazing fashion and lesbian-like entrance, fashion gurus and pervs alike were satisfied. Not surprisingly, Tara and Angelina were given separate entrances. Tara was out before the Knockouts Champion and she took the time to pose with a guy who was holding a sign that read “Tara’s Future X-Husband.” Amazing. Tara was sporting a St. Louis Cardinals’ baseball cap (gag) and she had her precious baby with her as well. Tara gives a disgusted So Cal Val the spider, tosses the baseball cap to the crowd, and makes her way into the ring where TBP are just chillaxing. Angelina Love is out last and Velvet Sky starts to mock her ex-BFF by running around the ring with her hands behind her back mimicking being handcuffed.

Angelina pays no attention and starts pose, basking in her championship glory. She holds the belt up, showing it off, and finally gets into the ring in her own beautiful person style. She hands the title off to the referee, who shows off all three belts. Angelina and Tara don’t really seem to agree on who will start the match off, but Angelina eventually does and she takes Velvet down with a nice, girly spear. Velvet ends up getting beat on for a few seconds before she escapes, but since she’s not Houdini, she can’t make herself disappear. Angelina easily catches her and connects with an elbow, taking Velvet to the mat. Velvet is clearly flustered and scrambles to her corner while begging the referee for a time out. There’s no time outs in wrestling so Velvet smartly makes the tag and we get out first look at Madison.

Read more

Impact Write-Up (April 12, 2010): Leather and Lace? More Like Bondage and Beat-downs.

Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past few months, it’s plain as day to see that the Knockouts division is slowly going down hill. The girls are being turned into pretty face divas instead of being allowed to get down and dirty, and be the Knockouts we all know they can be. This week’s Impact was another sign that the times are changing with the little Florida based company that desperately wants to compete with the billion-dollar empire that calls Connecticut home. Last week’s lock box disaster included contract winner, Velvet Sky, announcing that she would be facing Angelina Love in a Leather and Lace match. We got that match this week (sort of) and a lot more.

Angelina is the first competitor to make her way to the ring. I’m not seeing much lace on her outfit, but whatever. She’s got the TNA Knockout Championship strapped around her waist so I guess she can do and wear whatever she wants. That’s fair. She looks gorgeous, either way, and right at home with that title. The crowd gives her a nice reaction and it’s cool to see Angelina as champion again even if she won it in a cheap way. Velvet comes out second and she’s got her title and a microphone. She stops at the ramp and announces that tonight’s match is not going to be leather and lace because none of the perverts deserve to see her goodies (nevermind that she was more covered up this week than usual). Angelina rolls her eyes, not surprised, because she knows better than anyone than Velvet is all about shenanigans. Velvet smiles so pretty and says that tonight she is going to face Angelina in a handcuff match and that she was gunna whip that booty. Angelina perks up and gets annoyed, especially when the referee starts to manhandle her. He slaps those cuffs on her pretty tightly and Velvet makes her way to the ring once Angelina is secured.

To Velvet’s surprise, Angelina is the first to mount some offense. She stiffly kicks Velvet as she’s slipping between the ropes. Velvet goes down and begins screeching her head off, while Angelina happily puts the boots to her ex-best friend forever. The referee eventually pulls Angelina off Velvet, which gives the devilish Miss Sky the chance to grab the Knockout Championship and hit Angelina with it. Angelina goes down like a ton of bricks and Velvet takes control. She motions for the microphone and tells everyone that she forgot something. The match is now under “I Quit” rules. Velvet starts to beat on Angelina and show her who the true beautiful person is. Angelina basically has no fight at this point because well she’s handcuffed and got smacked with a gold belt. The beat-down is pretty weak, but props to Velvet for protecting Angelina during it. Velvet continues her offense and in a really cool spot, she starts choking Angelina with her own hair. Once Velvet tires of that she gets up, grabs the microphone, and demands that Angelina say those two magic words. Of course Angelina refuses.

Read more

Madison Rayne vs Tara

How’s that for a fast turnaround? TNA has uploaded a brand new Knockouts webmatch between Madison Rayne and Tara which was only taped on Tuesday night. Watch below:

Madison is first out to the ring with Lacey Von Erich in toe. Tara walks down to the ring a little bare, now that she is without her Knockouts Championship thanks to Lock Box-gate, the name of which is ridiculed by Taz. Our sentiments exactly, Taz.

As Tara poses in the ring with her pet tarantula, Poison, Madison flees the ring for her life seeking solace in Lacey VE. Madison eventually gets back in the ring and tries to act sexy and it comes off super unnatural. I have never bought Madison as ‘the sexy bitchy girl’ and I still don’t. Not to say she hasn’t worked hard in trying to develop into the role, but I still see the girl next door trying to act all sexy~ and it’s all awkward looking. Imagine Taylor Swift gyrating. Yeah… not pretty.

With Tara ‘mesmerized’ by her Kelly Kelly-like dancing, Madison goes for a kick but Tara grabs her leg and slams her down on the mat before mounting Rayne and hitting her with several haymakers. I’d like to think that Tara is unloading her tension over the night before here. Tara hits a scoop slam, takes off her top [as you do] and hits a beautiful standing moonsault into a cover but no dice.

Read more

Impact Write-Up (April 5th, 2010): Are We Knockouts or Are We Divas?

Wow, I don’t even know how to start off this Write-Up. First, I guess, we all got a surprise last night when the 8-Knockout Tag Team match that was announced was mysteriously changed into this hot mess of a match with rules that were more confusing than a episode of Lost. If you want an in-depth explanation of what went down, please go and listen to the Post Raw and Impact Show or just watch this video of Christy explaining what’s going to happen with the Knockouts tonight.

So there you have it. The Beautiful People kick off the live Impact after Christy explains the rules and what’s at stake. Velvet Sky and Madison Rayne are looking adorable with their pink outfits and tag titles, but Lacey is missing in action interestingly enough. Velvet starts off by saying that the Knockouts continue to revolutionize this business and tonight the Beautiful People will own three of the four lock boxes. She claims they’re going to get the spider and squash it like they should have done ages ago. Then she says they’re going to get the open contract so they can dominate whoever they want, and last but not least, they’ll get the TNA Knockout Championship, which is apparently the highest honor for women in wrestling today. Madison takes her turn speaking next. She agrees with “Vel Vel” and says tonight the Beautiful People will get it all; everything they deserve and everything they are owed. While she’s talking, Lacey von Erich walks out of the bathroom wearing nothing but a smile and a fuzzy white towel. She takes front and center and says no one will ever forget the night they saw Lacey von Erich strutting around in her bra and panties.

LVE: “Tonight, everybody wins.”

Oh boy.

With the Knockouts basically spread through out the entire show, it’s awhile before we get another segment, but when we do, it’s Christy Hemme standing with Team Tara. Team Tara is comprised of soon-to-be former champ, Tara, Angelina Love, ODB, and Hamada.

Read more

Impact Write-Up (March 23rd, 2010): WWE Take Notes: It is Possible to Use All Girls in a Match

Twenty-four hours after Daffney and Tara wowed us with their impressive match at Destination X, the Knockouts were back in action live on Impact with an 8-Knockout Tag Team match that had a scary Diva feel to it in a sense that they were trying to cram as many Knockouts into one segment as possible. The team of Knockout Champion, Tara, Angelina Love, Sarita, and Taylor Wilde took on Team Beautiful People (Lacey von Erich, Velvet Sky, and Madison Rayne) and Daffney.

The Knockouts had the privilege of being the opening match this week and the Beautiful People were the first ones out. Madison and Velvet had matching outfits on again while Lacey stuck out like a sore thumb as usual. That said, the von Erich spawn looked gorgeous. Madison and Velvet had their tag team titles strapped around their waists and on a personal note, I love seeing these girls with titles. Their tag team partner, from Sybil, Texas, Daffney came out next in the same outfit from Destination X. She’s proudly carrying Tara’s kidnapped pet and the Beautiful, who have high tailed it to the outside of the ring, are freaking out over the gross little critter. Daffney is showing off the tarantula when Tara comes storming down to the ring. She gets inside before Daffney sits the spider cage thing down and threatens to stomp on it. Tara begs her not to do it, and that gives those sneaky Beautiful People a chance to sleek into the ring and start stomping and beating on Tara. For the second week in a row, Daffney and TBP work together and Tara is the victim of a four-on-one beatdown until Saritaylor come running to the ring to make the save in their horrendous, circus freak matching outfits. Angelina isn’t far behind them. Shit hits the proverbial fan and we have an eight woman brawl which has really gotten the crowd going.

So of course, TNA goes to commercial break.

Read more

Impact Write-Up (March 15th, 2010): Wash, Rinse, Repeat

To follow the trend of recent weeks, TNA recycled their Knockouts’ storylines and twisted them into a pretzel to make both seem original. Was there progression? Did the it all make sense? Are we actually going to get a title match on pay-per-view this month? All these questions and more will be answered… after the break! Just kidding about the break! This isn’t American Idol and I am not Ryan Seacrest. If you do want answers, then you must continue reading.

The part of Impact worth watching begins with an amazing promo by Angelina Love. Christy asks Angelina how she feels seeing the group she founded walk away with the Knockouts Tag Team Championships. Angelina gets a great look on her face that’s a mix of disgust and annoyance that her ex-best friends are actually champions and she starts to vent about it. Angelina flat out admits that it sucks to see the group with the titles and that it made her mad. She claims she is going to do something about it and issues an open challenge to any member of the Beautiful People to meet her in the ring tonight. She says she doesn’t care which member it is because all of them have been ducking her for weeks and as far as she is concerned, they’re all trying to be like her. Angelina is an original, and she adds that she is going to start cleansing TNA one Beautiful person at a time.

After a promo featuring time wasters and a tag team match, the Beautiful People are seen backstage with their newly won titles discussing their options. They make plans as the show fades to commercial and after one more segment, we finally get our Knockout match of the night. Angelina comes to the ring first and her hair looks absolutely fabulous. Her ring entrance is short lived because as soon as Angelina gets into the ring, the Beautiful People’s theme song hits. Velvet Sky and Madison Rayne are carrying the titles on their shoulders while Lacey von Erich remains the sole possessor of the ugly stick. The three BP members are carrying themselves with a renewed sense of confidence this week and their smiles are so blinding white the Impact Zone doesn’t really need all those harsh lights while they’re around. Velvet has a microphone and she looks down to the ring with a sneer across her lovely face.

Read more

Lacey Von Erich Begins Wrestling Training

The Beautiful People’s Lacey Von Erich will report to Mach One Wrestling (also known as M1) in California today to begin extensive training in wrestling. The TNA Knockout wrote on her Facebook page that she will attend training three times a week under a new deal struck between M1 and TNA. She writes: I start … Read more

Impact Write-Up (March 8th, 2010): Congratulations Beautiful People! You Now Have Accessories

Tonight was a historic night for wrestling as round two of the Monday Night Wars kicked off and in grand fashion for both the Divas and Knockouts in my opinion. Both shows featured tag team action but on Impact we got a treat. With Awesome Kong basically done in TNA, the question has remained: “What’s going to happen with the Knockouts Tag Team Championships?” We got our answer and in spectacular fashion. Missing in action Knockouts Taylor Wilde and Sarita returned to television to take on The Beautiful People (Madison Rayne and Velvet Sky) and the team of Angelina Love and Tara in a triple threat tag team match.

Before the match gets underway, we’re told that due to the champions not defending the titles, Hamada and Awesome Kong have been stripped of them. That’s unfortunate for Hamada because she’s an innocent victim in all of this but life goes on and Tenay tells us new champions will be crowned tonight in a triple-threat match. Taylor Wilde and Sarita sort of get an entrance in the fact it’s nearly half over when the camera cuts to the ring area. They’re in terrible matching outfits but the fact they bother to coordinate their outfits give you a sense that they’re a real team. As the inaugural Knockout Tag Champs, it’s been far to long since they’ve actually gotten to perform on a televised show. The audience loves them and they receive a nice reaction as they play to the crowd and pose in the ring. Their posing is short lived because the theme music of the Beautiful People started to play and those three devilish Knockouts walked onto the ramp. They do their usual posing and flirting with each other, before finally getting in the ring and settling down for business. They know what a huge opportunity this is and how winning tonight could solidify this version of the Beautiful People as the real deal. Team number three consists of our Knockouts Champion, Tara, and ex-TBP member Angelina Love. Angelina is basically foaming at the mouth at the chance to get in the ring against her haters and Tara just looks fierce like usual.

Upon entering the ring, Angelina makes a beeline right for her former friends. Velvet and Madison are quick to get the heck out of dodge but a sluggish Lacey von Erich nearly gets caught in the clutches of a furious blonde Canadian. TBP start screeching at Angelina and Tara, causing an annoying distraction, and that allows Saritaylor to quickly go for a roll-up pin on both. The bell rings but before a count can be made, Angelina and Tara both kick-out. Nice explosive start to the match. Thankfully it doesn’t take long for the chaos to get sorted out and each team of ladies take a corner. Taylor and Tara are the two who officially kick us off. Taylor hits a nice kick to bring Tara down to the mat and she immediately goes for a quick cover. Tara kicks out after a one count but that doesn’t stop Taylor’s effort. She uses the ropes for momentum and goes to leap over Tara, but Tara catches her, holds her for a second, then just brutally drops Taylor down to the mat on her chest. In obvious pain, Taylor makes the tag to her partner. Sarita comes in, ducks a clothesline attempt, and delivers a nice modified neckbreaker to Tara, sending the Champ staggering. Sarita goes flying to the ropes to get momentum for a crossbody and Velvet smartly tags herself in. Sarita is unable to go for the pin on Tara and Velvet takes over.

Read more

Impact Write-Up (March 4th, 2010): Approved Change of Pace

This week on Impact we were treated to a slight change of pace. Instead of more Tara/Daffney build-up we got a video package, backstage fight, and in-ring segment all featuring the Beautiful People and Miss Angelina Love. Ever since Angelina made her return to TNA, the Beautiful People have gone after full force and this week was no different. The backstage beatdown was pretty intense but what happened in the ring was even better. Lets get down to business.


Skip to 4:46

The video package starts to play and it highlights everything that has happened between Angelina and TBP so far. We’ve already seen the highlights of all these incidents so they’re not really worth reviewing. Once the highlight reel is over, we’re told that earlier in the evening, Angelina Love was in a photoshoot that was interrupted by the Beautiful People. The Canadian Knockout starts swinging as soon as Madison Rayne and Lacey Von Erich arrive on the scene. Madison gets knocked back thanks to a stiff looking shot to her face and Lacey suffers the same fate. An official tries to hold Madison back but she shoves him to the ground and goes after Angelina. The two-on-one situation eventually overtakes Angelina and she’s forced into submission. Madison and Lacey beat the hell out of Angelina and throw her into a random steel barricade that is sitting backstage. Lacey grabs Angelina’s arm and pulls her through the railing, trapping her and leaving her as an easy piece of prey for Velvet Sky who finally gets in on this.

When Velvet shows up she has a hot pink belt in her hands. She starts screaming at Angelina like some kind of psycho and then begins whipping her. It’s pretty intense segment. Lacey tries to calm Velvet down and tells her “that’s enough” but Vel Vel’s not having that. She marches behind the barricade, gets right in Lacey’s face, and screams at her that “it’s only enough when I say it’s enough.” A meek Lacey can do nothing but agree with Velvet and Velvet gets in one last good, hard lick. She slams the belt down and declares “now it’s enough” and she stalks off in a fit of rage. Madison and Lacey gulp and stare at each other quickly before leaving the beaten Angelina down on the ground and hurrying off after their teammate.

Read more

Impact Write-Up (February 11th, 2010): Here’s To You, LVE

(** author’s note: To all the readers, I apologize profusely for this going up so late! My work schedule was nothing but mornings this week and it completely threw me through a loop! Hopefully the read is well worth the wait =D)

For the past few weeks, Impact has turned into the Beautiful People show and this week was no exception. As usual, Lacey Von Erich, Madison Rayne, Velvet Sky, and ex-member Angelina Love took center stage. Joining them this week was special guest star, Knockout’s Champion Tara. What did the fabulous fivesome have up their sleeves for us this week? Click the video below to watch or just continue reading if you can’t be bothered.


Before the match begins, we’re treated to an interview with Angelina and Tara. Right off the bat, Christy brings up the past history between the two former rivals and Angelina is quick with a rebuttal. She flat out admits that she didn’t care for Tara when she (Tara) first arrived in TNA. Tara takes it in stride and Angelina continues on by saying the past is the past. She brings up last week and the amazing match the two women had, then gets disgusted because of how the Beautiful People interfered. Tara mumbles “welcome to my world” but Angelina brushes it off. She says that last week she and Tara had each others’ backs and that this week it would be no different.

Christy, who’s been nodding along all this time, turns her attention to Tara and asks her if there’s a special plan to take care of the Beautiful People tonight. Tara says something along the lines of “…the plan for tonight is quite simple. It’s going to get Ugly.” A confident Angelina takes the microphone, puts on her serious face, and adds “…real ugly.” Great promo by both.

After the interview, the terrible ring entrance by the Beautiful People takes place. I’m all about flashy entrances, but they completely kill me (and not in a good way). Madison and Velvet having matching outfits is completely adorable and I really like Lacey’s boots. Angelina walks out to the ring next wearing something slightly trashy but what else is new? The girl does the trash look well and manages to make it not look disgusting like it would on most people. Finally, Tara comes to the ring. All I can do is pray for no wardrobe malfunction this week. It takes a little longer than necessary to get everyone settled but when they finally do, Velvet bravely offers to being the match against Tara. It takes all of two seconds for Tara to tag in Angelina and once that happens, Velvet is off and running. She wants absolutely nothing to do with Angelina and I don’t blame her. Angelina is one fierce mamacita and Velvet stands no chance against her!

Velvet seems to be heading towards the ramp and Angelina continues to stalk her. When Velvet sees she has nowhere to go reality sinks in. She’s totally stuck. Angelina is almost to her when Lacey comes up from behind. This doesn’t faze Angelina because she slaps the stew out of her replacement. Angelina climbs back on the apron where Madison is waiting to confront her. Needless to say Angelina doesn’t care what Madison has to say because Madison Rayne gets a boot to the gut for her efforts. While all that goes on, Velvet gets back in the ring and she starts attacking Angelina. She gets her former bestie down on the mat and begins to work her over, gaining the clear upperhand. A small “You Can’t Wrestle” chant breaks out while Velvet is offense but if she actually cares, she doesn’t show it. She happily chokes Angelina Love with the woman’s own hair. When Velvet tires of the choking, she gets Angelina in a position to whip her into the ropes. I kid you not, someone from the crowd screams “TAG IN LACEY” but that doesn’t happen… yet. (Dun, dun, duuuunnnn!)  Velvet whips Angelina across the ring, but it does her no good. Angelina knows what’s coming and attempts to go on offense. Velvet anticipates this, falls flat on her backside, and rolls out of the ring.

Velvet wants none of what Angelina’s got, and that’s fine with the Canadian. She turns her attention to Madison and starts picking on her. The pastel blue attired member of TBP is pulled into the ring by her blonde and pink locks, and is forced to eat a face full of turnbuckle as a punishment. Angelina tags in Tara and the Knockout’s Champion gets her first taste of action in the match! Tara sunset flips in, goes for the cover on Madison, but only gets a two count. Madison gets up but is taken down twice with arm drags. She’s taken down again with a suplex and Tara rolls her over into a guillotine-like move. Tara does a great job of bullying Madison around the ring with various little moves and eventually Madison has to get out of the ring. Velvet and Lacey jump down from the apron and start to comfort their fellow BP member. The Beautiful People receive no sympathy for Tara and Angelina. Angelina gets into the ring with Tara and the two women bounce off the ropes and come flying at the backs of the BP with dropkicks. All three members go flying into the guardrail and I’ll let you guess which one took that bump awkwardly. Tara and Angelina celebrate their dominance as the match fades to a commercial break.

Read more

Impact Write-Up (Feb. 4th, 2010): Tara and Angelina Do Work

This week for the Impact Write-Up, I’m going to try something different. Instead of the usual match review with my comments thrown in there, I’m going to do just a plain review of the actual match itself and what led up to it, then at the end I’m going to list the things I enjoyed about Impact, and the things I didn’t. I hope this column turns out a lot neater and more informative than my two previous ones.

The Knockout portion of Impact started with an interview from both champion and later on, the challenger. Both put over the match and touched on issues that were impacting them at the moment, no pun intended. Angelina Love had a great line during hers; it was something along the lines of “I taught the Beautiful People everything they know, but I didn’t teach them everything I know.” Perhaps that foreshadows something to come?

After patiently waiting all night for the match, it finally rolls around as the main event of the evening. A video package starts us off highlighting Angelina’s ongoing feud with the Beautiful People. That leads into Angelina’s ring entrance and she’s looking pretty amazing tonight, in my opinion. She plays to the crowd, who clearly love her, and gets in the ring looking confident and relaxed about this match-up. Tara comes out second, with her championship strapped around her waist and her spider with her, of course! The match gets underway after the referee lets us know this match is indeed a championship bout. The two old rivals and new frenemies lock up and start jostling back and forth for position. Tara gets Angelina in a headlock and takes her down to the mat. She doesn’t let up on this but Angelina uses her strength to muscle Tara into a pinning position, but she barely gets a two count. The two women start moving around on the mat and Angelina gets Tara in a headscissors. What follows is a nice little series of wrestling between these two talented women. Tara rolls out of the headscissors and flips over Angelina, going for the pin. She gets a two count before Angelina bridges up. A few reversals happen and then Angelina executes a backslide and gets a two count before Tara wiggles out of it. The two women continue to actually wrestle before we’re interrupted by a far too long commercial break.

The match returns and we’re treated to even more chain wrestling from Angelina and Tara. Angelina takes the advantage for the most part of this, but Tara does a cutesy cartwheel thing and gets her upperhand back. It doesn’t last long before Angelina gets Tara into a pinning position and gets another two count. After Tara kicks out, Angelina gets her up and forces the Californian to eat a face full of turnbuckle. The blonde Canadian attempts to make Tara eat the opposite one, but the crafty Tara reverses it and Angelina finds herself in a world of hurt. Tara whips Angelina into the corner and charges, but Angelina lifts up and then rolls down Tara! She rolls her up for a pin but only gets yet another two count. Tara quickly gets up and gets Angelina in position for a nice sidewalk slam. She now tries to get a pin but Angelina powers out after a two count. Angelina is slow to get up and she’s gripping her lower back, but when she does make it to her feet she throws a few shots at Tara’s face then sends her into the ropes. She misses a kick and Tara catches her. She sets Angelina up for the Widow’s Peak but the crafty Angelina slides down and gets Tara in a pinning position. Tara rolls out of it and gets her entire body weight on top of Angelina, pinning her flat to the mat. Tara finally… FINALLY gets the W in a most amazing match-up.

Read more

Impact Write-Up (January 28th, 2010): Beautiful People Overload

All I have to say is thank God for the fast forward button. I thought I could be strong and sit through an entire episode of Impact tonight but man, was I ever wrong! It’s truly an excruciating show to watch and I literally watched the whole thing on fast forward until it came back from commercial break and we were treated to a shot of the Beautiful People backstage getting ready for their six woman tag team match. The brief segment (and when I say brief, it seemed less than thirty seconds!) was nothing more than two of the Beautiful People stretching each other out and the third standing in the middle looking like a little lost puppy. It doesn’t take rocket science to figure out who is who. Mike Tenay mentions that the Beautiful People will be in action later on tonight against the Knockouts Champion and Tag Team Champions, so of course I’m forced to sit here and fast forward through more garbage; aka old men desperately clinging to one last shot at glory they do not deserve. Blah.

I’m not one who reads spoilers so I was surprised to see that the Beautiful People actually got an interview. Christy Hemme made mention of the match but instead of asking them about their opponents, she asked them about Angelina Love. Velvet Sky spoke first and said that Angelina makes her sick and she’s just so tired of hearing about her. Velvet basically ripped on her former BFF and claimed that Angelina just wasn’t cut out to be a BP so that’s why she got to steppin’. Unfortunately Madison Rayne decided to talk next and she made me LOL IRL. Apparently Angelina Love is so 2009 and the Beautiful People have moved on to bigger and better things. Kudos to Madison and Velvet for keeping straight faces through that preposterous comment. Madison talked about how the Beautiful People were aiming for gold and rubbed her waist to signal that’s where it would it up going. I absolutely refuse to repeat the rest of the segment because I firmly believe everytime Lacey Von Erich speaks God kills a kitten and I just don’t agree with animal abuse.

We finally get to the match and the Beautiful People are out to the ring first with a horrible choreographed ring entrance. As cute as their pink outfits are, their antics just aren’t this week. I hated von Erich’s awkward flip over the top rope and I when I went to pause the match to dissect the ring entrances, I paused on a shot of Velvet’s bottom which does absolutely nothing for me. Madison’s hair looks absolutely terrible and in my opinion, Velvet just doesn’t seem to have as much fun anymore. Awesome Kong and Hamada make their way out next and if this is truly Awesome Kong’s last match in TNA, I’m sure going to miss her. She’s got the best entrance music ever and it just scares me to see her stalking down towards the ring because I sure wouldn’t wanna face her! Tara gets a nice reaction from the crowd and I chuckled at seeing TBP freak out over the spider.

The match gets started pretty quickly with Hamada and Madison Rayne. There’s not a whole lot of messing around at the start of this like there was in last week’s match and that’s always good to see. Hamada takes Madison to the mat with a wicked kick and doesn’t let up on her offense by chopping the pink and blonde headed beautiful person. This continued for a few moments before Hamada decided to unleash her inner Undertaker and do his “Old School” type of move by walking on the top rope while hanging onto Madison’s arm. Hamada put her own twist on the move by flipping down and executing a weird looking arm drag to which Madison bounced back up from. Madison is able to make the tag to Velvet, who stayed in the match for approximately two point two seconds before tagging out to LVE.

Read more

Hulk Hogan: Lacey Von Erich “Can’t Work”

TNA’s new man in charge, Hulk Hogan didn’t pull any punches when asked about Lacey Von Erich on Bubba the Hate Sponge’s radio show today. When asked what he and Eric Bischoff think of Von Erich, he said that she “can’t work,” a wrestling term for basically sucking in the ring. Meanwhile Bischoff chimed in … Read more

Impact Write-Up (January 21st, 2010): Knockout Action… Diva Style?

I suppose I should begin this by introducing myself. My name is Cryssi and I’m Diva Dirt‘s new TNA correspondent. It’s an honor to be here and I promise to bring my best each and every week with whatever I do here! I’m excited for this job. Part of the excitement stems from the fact I’ve been thrust into the middle of a train wreck of a show. TNA is a soap opera of revolving doors, pointless drama, and politics. At least that’s how I view it. With the departure of Alissa Flash and Awesome Kong’s request for her release, we’re left with some questions about the Knockouts division. None of them were answered on this week’s episode of Impact and we likely won’t know much until TNA returns for more tapings. Tara was absent from this show, as were Knockout Tag Champs, Awesome Kong and Hamada. The Beautiful People and Angelina Love were the only entertainment for us Knockout fans. So with all that being said, lets get on with my first ever Impact Write-Up!

We’re treated to a backstage shot of Angelina getting mentally ready for her match but that’s not all fans. We get a video package too! The history of Angelina’s break-up with the Beautiful People is rehashed, and I’m not going to lie; I still laugh whenever I see her beat the crap out of Velvet Sky. It’s hilarious. Madison Rayne comes out first and she doesn’t look half bad tonight. She’s improving week after week and her antics toward the crowd were pretty funny. I loved when she booed the fan that was booing her, and her overall attitude was great and spot on. She does her posing with the ropes and on the turnbuckles, and it surprised me to see that she came out sans Velvet and Lacey von Erich. Angelina comes out next, to her new music, and gets a hot face reaction. The crowd seemed really excited to see her and rightfully so. She’s one of the few women left in TNA now who can actually put on an amazing, legit match.

The bell rings and Angelina goes after Madison. The referee tries to stop it seeing as how Madison is backed into the corner, and to her credit Angelina backs off. Madison uses Angelina’s sportsmanship to her advantage and goes right after her former leader. She hits a few nice punches and gets Angelina to the mat. The Canadian does her best to defend herself, but Madison doesn’t really let up until she (Madison) gets back to her feet. Angelina is up as well and is met with a few stiff forearms to her jaw, then finds herself pressed against the ropes. Madison whips Angelina to the other side, but momentum switches and Angelina slams Madison down to the mat by her hair!

With Madison down, Angelina takes charge. She mounts her and begins to unleash her angst on her former lackey. Madison takes the abuse and then gets thrown into the corner. Okay, she doesn’t get thrown. Her face eats a mouthful of turnbuckle and it looks like it really hurts. Madison stumbles to the left and is “helped” to her feet by Angelina. Angelina goes for a whip, Madison reverses it, Angelina ducks a clotheslines, and Madison gets absolutely destroyed by a sick bicycle kick! Angelina goes for an arrogant cover and gets the victory.

Read more

The Guide to Impact (January 14th, 2010): The Second Coming of Love

This week on TNA Impact, one of the biggest news stories of 2009 came full circle as former Knockouts Champion Angelina Love made her return to the company after being released in September due to visa issues. But before we get into that, Velvet Sky and Madison Rayne of The Beautiful People took on new Knockouts Tag Team Champions Awesome Kong and Hamada. Check out the match and Angelina’s return below:

The Beautiful People make their way to the ring first, sporting their new matching ring gear. I know she’s not actually wrestling, but would it kill them to pick up a trashy velour outfit for Lacey? She looks tragically out of place next to the newly coordinated Velvet and Madison. As the trio strut their stuff on the ramp, Velvet Sky spots a familiar face in the crowd. Is that… Ashley Massaro? No, it’s her old friend Angelina Love! Reunion Time! Velvet and Madison seem ecstatic to see their former teammate, but Lacey Von Erich doesn’t share the sentiment. In fact, she makes sure to give Angelina a good dose of stink-eye while greeting her. I love how TNA played up the tension between Lacey and Angelina. If I didn’t know any better, I would think Lacey genuinely disliked Angelina, because that fake ass smile she gave her was 100%, Grade A bitchy. I may not a fan of Lacey between the ropes, but it’s the little things like this that she excels in.

Next out is the Tag Team Champions Awesome and Hamada looking surly as usual. I couldn’t help but notice that Hamada seems to still be having trouble with that ankle of hers. Props to her for working matches essentially on one foot.

The bell rings and it looks like it’ll be Hamada and Velvet kicking things off. Velvet starts the match on a sour note, striking a Karate Kid crane pose. That’s not offensive at all, right? The two lock up and Hamada forces Velvet to the ropes prompting a not-so-clean break by Hamada. Hamada unwisely turns her back to Velvet, who jumps at the opportunity to take her down by the hair. Velvet mounts Hamada and hits a few rights, followed by a splash in the corner and her trademark bulldog. She goes for the pin, but it’s not enough to keep Hamada down.

Velvet and Madison exchange quick tags, keeping control of the champion. The duo take a bit too much time executing a double Russian Legsweep and Hamada capitalizes, tripping both girls and tagging in Kong. Kong snatches both girls down to the mat by the hair, before stacking them up in the corner for a splash of her own. Finally, she grabs Madison, the official sacrificial lamb for The Beautiful People, and hits the Awesome Bomb for the three count.

As we said on last night’s Post-Impact Show, the match was just fraction of what it could have been. It seemed to drag on and it didn’t help that the majority of the match was worked by Velvet Sky, who is definitely the weaker link wrestling wise. Furthermore, where were Sarita and Taylor Wilde? If anything, they deserve first crack at Kong and Hamada. Hopefully we’ll be seeing them next week on Impact.

Read more